Saluting My Husband
By Lollie Hofer
“Honor one another above yourselves.” Romans 12:10b
Mike was wounded. I saw the pain on my husband’s face and heard it in his voice as the words came pouring out. “You’ve distanced yourself from me. Your words are sharp, bitter. We don’t touch or kiss anymore. I’m hurting but you don’t seem to care.”
I sat silently on the couch for a long time after he left the room. He was right. I wasn’t showing him the honor he needed. Love begins in the home. How could I care for others according to Romans 12:10, if I shunned the one closest to me?
Honestly, when there was affection, Mike reached out first. When there was kindness it came from him. The times I initiated any physical or emotional contact, I had ulterior motives. It’d been a long time since I had anticipated, or even acknowledged, his needs.
John Bengel, a Bible Scholar, once said, “The Talmudists say, ‘Whosoever knows that his neighbor has been in the habit of saluting him, should anticipate him by saluting him first’.”
It was time to salute my husband. I asked God to forgive me through His Son, Jesus. I also asked for a heart of compassion toward Mike. I knew it was my turn to honor my spouse by taking the first initiatives.
With help from the Holy Spirit, I’m slowly changing. Growth has come in baby steps with many more to go. During my devotional times I’m committed to praying for Mike and constantly ask the Lord to show me “honoring” opportunities.
I try to anticipate my husband’s needs sometimes in the simplest of ways. It could be a quick kiss or hug before I head out the door for work. It might be snuggling next to him in his oversized recliner. Or silencing my criticism when I want to nag.
Love and honor begin with those closest to us. Is there someone you can salute today?
Lollie Hofer is a wife, mother, grandmother and freelance author. She and her husband, Mike, are blessed with two adult children and three grandchildren. They live in Omaha, Nebraska. She attends Omaha Christian Center where she is involved in the children’s ministries. It is her desire for the Lord Jesus to be lifted high in all she writes. You are invited to visit her blog at lolliehofer.blogspot.com.
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Originally published Monday, 27 November 2023.