Reclaiming Your Peace
Café Menu for Thursday, March 19, 2015
Today’s Special is: Removing the Toxic Relationships in your life
Carefully prepared just for you by your friend, Michelle S. Lazurek
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Romans 12:18 NIV
Is this what you want from this relationship?
This was an odd question for the Lord to ask me at 3 am. I immediately sensed he was speaking about a relationship I had with a loved one. For years, I had attempted to keep the peace, despite all of the times she selfishly put herself before me. I thought I was keeping the peace by overlooking those snubs, sweeping them under my emotional rug and hiding them in the closet, hoping I’d never have to look underneath.
I thought peace meant absence of conflict and it does. But peace also means “freedom from disquieting or oppressive thoughts or emotions; harmony in personal relations.”1 I had forgiven her for what she had done, but every time she repeated her offenses I realized something: I had a relationship with her, but did she really want one from me?
Even God doesn’t want a relationship with people who only use him for personal or material gain. God never forces us to have a relationship with him and we shouldn’t force others into relationship either. If we are keeping the peace at the price of becoming a doormat, we aren’t allowing others to become true disciples of Christ. We are making peace for them, but putting ourselves in turmoil in the process.
After a tough conversation with my loved one, we parted ways. It was difficult, but it was what was best in light of the current state of our relationship. When it was over, I thought I’d feel sadness or guilt over what I had done. But I actually felt something I didn’t know I was missing: peace.
As Christians, we are to work to achieve peace when it is possible, but sometimes peace is achieved through cutting off the toxic relationships in your life.
Lord, help us to reclaim the peace you want us to have in our lives.
© 2015 by Michelle S. Lazurek. All rights reserved.
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Originally published Thursday, 19 March 2015.