How Couples Can Encourage Singles to Wed
By Lynette Kittle
“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing” - 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Do you know singles paralyzed by the fear of marrying the wrong person? I do. So much so, that they go year after year too afraid to wed, extremely cautious of making a mistake they believe will cost them a lifetime.
Although God does want us to be wise, the fear of missing God’s will, or failing, or finding themselves in miserable marriage keeps men and women from marrying. Looking for a no-fail guarantee often keeps singles seeking an unrealistic perfection in a prospective mate.
Instead of trusting God to lead them, they second-guess their ability to choose a godly husband or wife. In their sincere pursuit of looking for “the right one,” they spend years searching instead of enjoying all God wants to give them in a marital relationship.
So how can married couples encourage singles to take the plunge? How can we help encourage sincere individuals looking to marry, to step out in faith and trust God in a marital relationship?
Below are five ways to encourage singles to say, “I do.”
1. Share your story. Tell singles how you met, fell in love, and married. Sometimes those looking for love have a certain idea of how it has to happen. Broaden their outlook on how God can bring two people together.
Also, offer to pray with your single friends concerning their desire to be married, asking God to lead, guide, and direct their steps.
2. Be real. Let singles know a successful marriage isn’t dependent on couples finding the perfect spouse but rather relying on the perfect One in their relationship. A couple’s reliance on God is what will keep them together.
3. Encourage trust in God. Help singles understand how success in marriage comes by trusting in God rather than themselves. Let them know God works through each other to help couples grow and mature in Christ.
Encourage singles to trust God in finding a spouse. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5).
As well as, “In all your ways submit to Him, and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:6).
4. Live out your marriage commitment in front of singles. Let them witness you as a couple working through differences, disagreements, and difficulties. Let them see how you couples don’t have to be exactly alike, in the exact same place in your spiritual growth, or agree on everything to have a fulfilling marriage.
5. Point out marriage’s godly benefits. Surprisingly, both men and women may not realize the great value God has given the roles of a husband and wife in marriage. Such as how priceless a wife is to her husband. “House and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from the Lord” (Proverbs 19:14).
Also, how a godly wife is of inestimable value to her husband. “Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value” (Proverbs 31:11).
As well, the godly favor husbands receive when they marry. “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22).
Lynette Kittle is married with four daughters. She enjoys writing about faith, marriage, parenting, relationships, and life. Her writing has been published by Focus on the Family, Decision, Today’s Christian Woman, iBelieve.com, kirkcameron.com, Ungrind.org, Startmarriageright.com, growthtrac.com, and more. She has an M.A. in Communication from Regent University and serves as an associate producer for Soul Check TV.
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Originally published Friday, 16 June 2023.
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