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Why Do We Hurt the Ones We Love? - Daughters of Promise - July 25, 2018

Christine Wyrtzen

The insolent smear me with lies; their heart is unfeeling like fat.  Psalm 119:69-70

I often wonder how people can do what they do.  (That includes me when I sin.)   Here, at least in one instance, the answer is given.  The sin ~ someone concocted a series of lies about another person for personal payoff.   The cause ~ their heart was fattened by pleasure over time and ceased to feel remorse over the pain they caused.

Consider a rebellious child who acts out.  Others can give into him to stop the tantrums.  But without discipline, he will repeat the tantrums until they become a way of life.  The pleasure he feels when he gets what he wants will become his drug of choice and he will cease to regret the acts he commits in favor of feeling good.  Without Jesus, there will be no remorse.

If you've suffered at the hands of one who never said "I'm sorry," you may have asked the question, “How could this person do this to me and not even feel badly that they hurt me?”  This scripture answers the question.  The pleasure they got by sinning against you numbed their conscience. They may have seen your tears, heard your pain expressed, but shrugged their shoulders.  You just couldn’t understand such coldness of heart.

God is our instructor today.  An unfeeling heart develops over time, never overnight.  It belongs to the person who has been fattened by the pleasures of his choices, even choices that have caused pain to someone he claims to love.

Only God can transform the heart of a sinner.  Only God can comfort the victims.  The sinner must love Jesus more than the payoff of self-gratification and the victim must love Jesus more than taking revenge.

Jesus, you knew the hearts of men.  You were not deceived.  Teach me to look beyond their behavior to the spiritual cause.  I need to pray for others’ spiritual disease instead of just asking you to stop their behavior.  Spirit, show me how to pray.  Amen

Originally published Wednesday, 25 July 2018.