I was staying up too late. I was wearing myself out. My heart needed to come back home after straying too far. I wanted my marriage to be strengthened and I longed to be a more attentive and kind mama.
I wanted to stop feeling overwhelmed by life and start thriving again.
I knew something had to give, but I felt stuck. I knew I needed to change but kept coming up short.
So my prayers went something like this, "God help. I’m scared to surrender, but I give you the right to control, again. I love you. I want to be made well—even though I don’t know what that process might look like."
God answered these prayers and dealt with my tightly wound issues with a miracle.
He responded to my need for restoration with new life. A pregnancy. My fifth child, fourth pregnancy.
And guess what? When you are pregnant you go to bed earlier. You preserve your energy because you want to care for the little one developing within. You try and breathe deeper and stress less because you are concerned for another. Your heart is turned home.
We were planning on adopting again but God had other plans.
He is unwinding me in a miraculous way. So many of my prayers were answered with the gift of this life growing within.
He does know what He is doing.
He has filled me with joy and peace.
My fears and tightly wound self still surface but I know that this baby is His doing and it is marvelous in our eyes.
He knew that I would be with child as I journeyed down this path of rest and prayer in October. My literal rest has increased by necessity as have my prayers—as pregnancy fears surface.
Sometimes God answers our prayers in surprising ways.
I don’t want to miss His answers, especially when they are unexpected.
Let’s pause to pray. Take some time and talk to God about these things:
God cares about your heart—He formed it after all. He doesn’t always answer in the ways we expect, but He knows what’s best. We can indeed trust Him.
Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. I cling to you; your right hand upholds me.” Psalm 63:7-8
Thousands of years ago God’s people longed for a King, to rule and reign and establish peace on their behalf. God answered by sending them a baby. And many of them missed the answer because they expected Him to answer in a certain way.
Jesus was more than the King of the Jews, He was the King of Kings who came to restore them to a relationship with their Heavenly Father. Sin had separated them from God and, in Jesus, a way was made for them to come Home. But Jesus did not just come for the Jews, He came for all of us.
Does your heart need to return to Jesus today? Or do you want to receive Jesus for the first time today? He came for you because He loved you. Jesus died for your sins so you could be completely forgiven. He rose again that you might be set free, no longer a slave to sin.
Jesus came to give you new life, to forgive your sins and to restore you.
His sinless life, death on the cross and resurrection from the grave are the ultimate Restoration Project. And you are the object of His affections.
In what ways do you long to be restored today? Talk to your Loving Father about it.
His answer might surprise you.
Katie M. Reid is a tightly wound woman who fumbles to receive and extend grace in everyday moments. She delights in her husband, four children and their life in ministry. Through writing, singing, speaking and photography Katie encourages others to find grace in the unraveling of life. She has an album, Echoes of My Heart, and is a writer for God-sized Dreams and Purposeful Faith. She blogs at katiemreid.com and can be found on Twitter @Katie_M_Reid