Originally published Monday, 25 June 2012.
“There are times when the actual experience of leaving something makes you wish desperately that you could stay, and then there are times when the leaving reminds you a hundred times over why exactly you had to leave in the first place.”
I cannot imagine the pace nor degree of changes that will take place in the next couple of months. Life will be very different. Of that I am most sure. No more security. No more familiarity. Not more routine or habits. No more trips to the local Starbucks where the barista knows your name, your drink, and that you had a Dr's appointment yesterday. All those will be left behind in the wake of our U-haul and the truck beds of friends and family who are helping us relocate.
Nothing will be the same.
Except for us.
We will be the only pieces of this growing puzzle that we recognize. And that scares me more than anything. Mostly because the implications are much to adult-like. I still feel so young, like a kid leaving for camp or college, but pre-planning Summers and Christmas breaks back at home. Not this time. This isn't just an experience or a phase of life. This is another significant milestone that will beautify our journey together.
Am I over dramatizing a bit? Naturally, but that's because it's so raw and see, I told you I was young!
However, the scariness of the unknown is also a double edged sword. It can kill a person as well as revive them. In our case, I think it will do the latter.
Ty and I have had the most interesting of roads in marriage; one that I wouldn't trade for the world. We make each other better, not just by "completing" each other, but by pushing the other towards a deeper holiness. He gently reminds me that I cannot control the world and I keep him sweet. I know the man I married, on June 27, three Summers ago is the man who God perfectly cut out for this place in my life. Together, we are the perfect balance of risk and safety. Together, we are much more effective than we ever were on our own.
He will be the one I cling to in the rise and fall of this great adventure. We might change, eventually, but we'll do it together.
So baby, here's to change! Moving ever so in the quickening pace of our lives.