Originally published Thursday, 02 June 2016.
I said the “F-Bomb” while on vacation last week.
For someone who stopped cussing YEARS ago- by the grace and power of God- this was kind of a huge deal.
The first time was on our last night in Jacksonville on the way to dinner, when my husband and I got into a huge argument that came out of left field and got heated a little too quickly- thanks to my impeccably timely “time of the month.” Sorry, TMI, but this is my blog.
I was so fuming that words just came spewing out of my mouth like a fire-hose. I FLEW completely off the handle- so much so, I tried to (jump) fly out of the car as we were parking, but the door was locked- seriously, I wish I was joking.
The fight eventually fizzled out, we apologized for all that was said, and decided to make the most of our last night together alone before we checked out of the hotel, traveled back home, and checked back into parent-hood.
The second time I was a potty-mouth was after we dropped off our rental car and I couldn’t find my iPhone.
Why I chose to use the F-word at that time? I was completely baffled too. Thankfully, my hubs didn’t hear me this time, but I know Who did.
I immediately asked for God’s forgiveness under my breath and kept on walking into the airport.
When we finally made it home to our (oh great) teething toddler, we had another heated situation because Paul had a massive migraine from the drastic change in pressure from our short flight from Chicago to St. Louis, and I tried my best to keep our sweet, precious (teething) angel from releasing his blood-curdling screams throughout our 1,000 sq ft, 2 bedroom apartment.
Anxiety, anger, and angst, yes.
But thankfully, no F-bombs were dropped this time. *Whew*
What was going on, I thought.
Why am I finding these old habits that I thought were dead and buried, suddenly alive and well again in my life???
Well, I figured the Word of God was a good place to find answers to life’s questions, as usual.
To put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness (Ephesians 4:22-24, ESV).
I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect (Romans 12:1-2, ESV).
The longer I walk with the Lord and see these ugly zombie behaviorsresurrect themselves in my life, the more I realize that these very important instructions in the Bible are a DAILY task. That old self who has been buried with Christ wants to come alive in your life again.
…I know that is a little over the top, but you get my point, don’t you?
We must DAILY be renewed in the spirit of our mind by reading God’s word, meditating on the scriptures, and communing with our Heavenly Father. We must DAILY put on Christ, put on love, put on the new life and His righteousness Jesus died for us to have!
EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.
If we don’t, those old habits that we thought we dead and gone will suddenly greet you with a smile and then try to choke the life out of you!
Now for a moment, I did feel terrible for allowing these bad habits to resurface and control my words, feelings, and behavior, but then I remembered God’s grace and mercy. I thanked Him for Jesus’ performance on the Cross and the Blood that covers all of my wrongs and when I miss the mark, beginning to walk in my old worn shoes of rebellion towards God.
I did not allow my thoughts to drag me into feelings of failure because I remembered the truth found in Romans 8:1:
There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus,[a] who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit (NKJV).
No matter if I find myself starting to walk in the flesh, it doesn’t matter, because I am forever IN CHRIST. The Spirit of God kindly brings conviction and helps me walk in God’s ways and truth. The more I continue to renew my mind with the Word of God, the more transformation the Holy Spirit will do in my heart and life.
But I must choose to do this DAILY. Not because I HAVE TO to be accepted in God’s eyes, but because I GET TO and WANT TO become more like Jesus every single day I walk this earth. I want to know the Father like Jesus did. I want to be as close to Him as I possibly can and the only way that I can do that is if I remember that I have been crucified with Christ and made alive IN HIM.
If I am alive IN CHRIST then I am dead to those stinkin’ old (zombie) habits.
Old habits may die hard, but I will choose to die DAILY so that Christ may be made alive in me.
Check out more of my blogs on www.emilyrosemassey.com! Also, visit my website for more information on how to stay connected with me, as well as info about my book Yielded in His Hands- now available on Amazon.com!