My Top Take-Home Tip From Dr. Gary Chapman's Session (The 5 Love Languages)

Originally published Thursday, 19 April 2012.



The chances are good that you’ve either read or heard of the book, “The 5 Love Languages.”  It’s a New York Times #1 bestseller, and has remained on marriage bestseller lists for the past 16 years – almost unheard of.  Author Dr. Gary Chapman has been pivotal in teaching practical ways we can ‘live out” love.

During the conference, Dr. Chapman spoke about things he wished he knew then that he knows now.

Here are several points that made a strong impact on me:

  1. “We spend far more of our time and energy on our careers than on our marriages.  Is it any surprise that we excel at work, but often fail at home?”  This struck me as one of those things that is totally obvious, and at the same time, totally easy to miss.
  2. “The best time to start learning about marriage is well-before you get married.  Even while you are dating or thinking about dating.”
  3. “I wish I had known that although I am a morning person, my wife is an evening person. That way, we could have just met for lunch.”  His point is that we often start of marriage with the false idea that we and our beloved will mesh easily.  But it’s usually the opposite!  We have to work to find ways to accommodate each other into a new “us.”

Experience is a great teacher.  But we don’t have to learn from scratch every time.

So here’s my question and challenge for you today:

What one thing will you do to seek out the experiences and wisdom of others, and fold it into the fabric of your marriage?  


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The best way we learn is from each other!  You have a unique wisdom and insight that can truly bless others.  So jump in.  Add your voice, build community, and be a blessing!  Share in the comment box, just below or upper left. I look forward to reading your thoughts and ideas.


Dr. Ann is a Christian M.D., wife to her wonderful husband, and mom to a terrific gang of three.  At The Marriage Checklist Ann blogs to help women in marriage, motherhood, and more!  She is syndicated on, and has been featured on BlogHer.comMichaelHyatt.comFox news, and Good Morning America.  

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Are you ready then?  Let’s go!

Copyright Dr. Ann 2012

(photo credit: Nutdanai Apikhomboonwaroot)