Overthinking every step, I tried not to trip as I walked into the coffee shop. There he was, the guy I was supposed to meet. “Oh gosh, do I have a booger in my nose? Lindsay, Focus, calm down, be normal.” I recited this all to myself as I approached.
Nerves heightened as I walked up for a hug. I wanted to throw up. Although an extreme extrovert, I couldn’t get a word out of my mouth that sounded even somewhat normal.
He’d ask a question. But I couldn’t think through the web of nerves that were crawling up my spine. Thoughts like “Does he like me? Am I good enough?” scurried through my brain.
“Did I even like him?” That’s the question I should have been asking myself. But I never thought about it. I was too concerned about him liking me. I wish I could go back to that painfully insecure version of myself and tell her. “Lindsay, he doesn’t even know you, calm down.”
That was the last 10 years of my dating life. Well until a friend said to me, “Lindsay, just think of dating like practice. Pray and ask God what He wants you to learn on each date.”
God started to show me how seeing everything as just practice would help to take the pressure off. He showed me how He wants us to stay present and not get ahead in our thoughts, aka fantasize about what it could be. Trusting Him instead with the outcome is what honors Him most.
Here are a few others thoughts along that same line:
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