“You look like the American Dream,” a friend commented recently on an Instagram picture of my family. As appreciative as I was of his comments I knew I could not take credit for my family unit. Recognition for the dream we depicted belonged to God alone.
This is because neither my husband nor I grew up in two parent families. We were both the products of single parent mothers. There was a lot we did not know, including how our past would affect the wedded bliss we so desired.
We did everything we were supposed to do in preparation for becoming one: read books, got loads of counseling, and had spiritual mentors. Sometimes, however, despite marital preparation, areas of our woundedness went undetected. Sometimes wounds were like chameleons: camouflaging into the fabric of our lives until the conditions are right for them to come out of hiding.
Discord, stress, and pressure are the types of environments that reveal our wounds in grand fashion. I have discovered this in 14 years of marriage. Whether we have wounds from childhood hurts or traumatic experiences, they have the potential to impact our marriage in detrimental ways. To help others avoid the pitfalls I faced, I’m sharing 10 ways your past is affecting your marriage, hoping they will help you heal from your past wounds.
Photo Credit: Unsplash/Jon Asato