This is not your forever place; there is an oasis of warmth and acceptance ahead. Do not lose heart, there is a God who sees.
Dear Lonely Girl,
It’s Valentine’s Day again, the dreaded holiday that reminds you of the very thing you’d like to forget - how lonely you are. Every long-stemmed rose and chocolate kiss feels like another tiny arrow in your tender heart.
You might even be surrounded by well-meaning people who try to include you on Valentine’s Day, but it just isn’t the same. You want that special someone to celebrate with - someone who will laugh at your cheesy Valentine’s Day card and spend way too much on dinner at the most popular restaurant in town.
I know. It’s easy to feel forgotten and let your mind go to dark, lonely places that are hard to climb out of. Being lonely is one of the worst feelings this side of heaven, and I’m sorry you’re going through this.
My prayer is that you’ll realize you’re less alone than you think. That’s the thing about loneliness; it convinces you that you are abandoned and forgotten. But please let me assure you, you are not forgotten on Valentine’s Day or any other day of the year. How do I know? Here are a few things I’ve learned on this journey called “life,” and I pray they encourage you today:
He Sees You
Would it help you to know that God sees the ache in your heart and the longing in your soul? It might seem like He is too busy to notice, but you are never beyond His view. You are always within the lens of His grace.
You might be asking, “If He sees me, why doesn’t He change my circumstances?” This is a question you’ll ask many times over the course of your beautiful life, but here’s what I know: There was once a lonely girl in the desert, mistreated, unwanted, and rejected. Yet, the Lord was with her. He stood by her in her desperate need, comforting her until she was able to lift her eyes and say, “You are the God who sees me, for I have now seen the One who sees me.” (Genesis 16:13)
Sweet girl, God sees you. Nothing escapes His loving gaze, and He longs to meet you right where you are. Don’t hide your true feelings. Let the Lord know exactly what you’re going through. Admit that you feel isolated, rejected, and forgotten. Talk to Him about the arid desert before you, and your wanderings in this uncomfortable place. Ask Him to be your healing balm, from the top of your head to the soles of your feet. He is with you, and He loves you.
As you feel the gentle lift of your chin, look into the eyes of the Savior and know you are loved. You are not forgotten in the unfairness of life. Hear His still, small voice whispering promises of a bright and beautiful future. This is not your forever place; there is an oasis of warmth and acceptance ahead. Do not lose heart, there is a God who sees.
Don’t Let Your Heart be Troubled
Remember what Jesus said in John 14:27, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” I know how difficult this is. After all, there are many things in the world that trouble us, causing us to lie awake at night. But what could happen if you stopped “letting” your heart be troubled? Instead of dwelling on loneliness, what if you carved out an intimate time of communion with Jesus?
Break the bread of forgiveness and pour the wine of reconciliation as you remember Who is with you. He has promised to be with you to the end of the age and He is with you now. Do you feel His peace? Remember, God’s peace is not the same as what the world has to offer, which is superficial and fleeting. His comforts are deep and lasting.
Rise up this Valentine’s Day, turn on your favorite worship song, and dance in the living room. Lift your arms in praise and receive the peace Jesus gives. Feel the troubles of your heart float away like a bouquet of balloons released into the sky. Watch them drift higher and higher until they disappear into the clouds. Then, inhale deeply of God’s perfect peace, the peace that floods your lonely heart with indescribable joy.
Others Have Gone Before You
My dear girl, it might be hard to believe, but even great men and women of faith have found themselves lonely from time to time. King David once said, “Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. Relieve the troubles of my heart and free me from my anguish.” (Psalm 25:16-17)
You see, it’s okay to admit you are lonely. Please don’t try to hide it or pretend it isn’t so. If possible, confide in a trusted friend who will pray for you and encourage you. Let them support you through this lonely season, especially on Valentine’s Day. Don’t assume they have better things to do. They love and care about you, so please receive their kind words and prayers.
If you remember, there was a woman who bravely pushed her way through the crowds to touch the hem of Jesus’ robe because she thought, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed” (Mark 5:28). This precious woman had been struggling and isolated for twelve long years, yet, with one courageous act of faith, she was made well.
Imagine the celebration that must have followed! Her season of loneliness had come to an end, and she must have been surrounded by friends and family who rejoiced in her newfound hope. Gone were the endless days of bleeding and pain. Gone were the scornful stares of people as she passed by in the street. Gone were the lonely nights of crying herself to sleep, longing for deliverance.
Let her beautiful example of courage and faith strengthen you, my girl. Others have gone before you on this path of loneliness, but God was faithful to deliver them. Will you trust in Him to deliver you as well?
Engraved on the Palm of God’s Hand
The Bible assures us that God comforts His people and has compassion on them, yet it’s easy to believe the enemy’s lie that He has forsaken us. Dear precious girl, please guard your heart against this terrible lie.
In Isaiah 49:15-16, God said, “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me.”
Close your eyes for a moment and envision the hands of God open before you. Written on them are the names of those He loves, and you are deeply loved. Not only are you engraved on the palm of His hands, but you are also written on the tablet of His heart. The Bible says His thoughts towards you are too numerous to count! Think about that. The God of the universe thinks about you constantly; you are always on His mind (Psalm 139:17-18).
Dear lonely girl, you are not forgotten. Valentine’s Day might be a painful reminder of the lonely season you’re in, but it only lasts a day. Sunrise is just over the horizon - the sunrise of God’s blessing and peace. Don’t let your heart be troubled and don’t let it be afraid. See your name engraved on God’s hand, etched for all eternity. He loves you and He is with you, today and always.
P.S. Here are more words of encouragement for your journey:
Photo Credit: ©Unsplash-Jamie-Street
Jennifer Waddle is the author of several books, including Prayer WORRIER: Turning Every Worry into Powerful Prayer, and is a regular contributor for LifeWay, Crosswalk, Abide, and Christians Care International. Jennifer’s online ministry is EncouragementMama.com where you can find her books and sign up for her weekly post, Discouragement Doesn’t Win. She resides with her family near the foothills of the Rocky Mountains—her favorite place on earth.