I have a confession to make: I hate silence and solitude.
As an introvert, you would think it would be easy for me to sit in silence by myself. While it’s true that some of my best times involve being by myself enjoying my favorite hobbies, sitting in silence with the only agenda of listening to God doesn’t exactly come easy to me. But to hear from God and discern His will for our lives, we must place ourselves in a position to listen to him. This spiritual discipline takes practice and perseverance. God commands us to make space for Him to speak:
“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth,” Psalm 46:10.
“After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper,” 1 Kings 19:12.
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Sometimes it is in the quietness of life that we hear God the most.
But how do we make room in our lives to listen to him? Consider the story of the woman at the well in John 4:4-6. Jesus had to go through Samaria, but He didn’t have to go through Sychar. He chose to go out of his way to walk through this town because He knew there was a woman there who He wanted to meet. Jesus made room in his busy life to minister to this woman and offer her salvation. How can we try to follow Jesus if we don’t make room for him in our busy lives? It may take sacrifice to make space for God, but spiritual disciplines like reading the Word, prayer, fasting, silence, and solitude are some of the most neglected, yet beneficial activities that allow our spiritual lives to thrive.
Because Jesus reshuffled his plans, that woman’s life was changed forever. And our lives are changed every time we make room for God, becoming more in tune with what He is doing in our lives.
Here are some tips to help you practice solitude and silence:
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1. Start with worship.
It’s no mistake that we begin weekly worship services with singing to the Lord. This helps clear your mind from other stressors or distractions that might deter you from engaging in intimacy with God. Singing in worship helps direct your heart, mind, and soul to where our attention belongs: to God. Whether you download your favorite worship songs or listen to CDs, spend time sitting with God and focusing on the song’s lyrics.
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2. Meditate (It's not what you think.)
Meditation is not reserved for some Eastern mystical religion. Many verses like Joshua 1:8 and Psalm 1:2 tell us to “mediate on the book of the Law.” To meditate simply means to repeat a verse in your head over and over, taking time to focus on its meaning.
Eastern meditation requires a person to empty their minds, but this is not required in Christian meditation. Instead, you fill yourself with the words of the Lord, allowing it to penetrate your heart by changing your mind. For example, if you are struggling with anxiety, repeat Philippians 4:6: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” This helps your mental and emotional state by removing fears and other negative thoughts that cloud your mind, allowing God’s love to comfort, encourage, and challenge you.
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3. Choose a good atmosphere.
Some people are indoor people, some prefer the outdoors. Wherever you like to spend time in silence, find a quiet area to let yourself get away from it all. Whether it’s going to an extra room in your home or a park, leave all phones and other electronic devices behind. These are only distractions. Listen to the sound of a babbling brook and enjoy the beauty of God’s creation around you. If you don’t have the luxury of getting away from children or other work-related duties, create an oasis where you are. This can even be in the bathtub. Light candles, set up your music, and relax. Invest in a white noise or other sound machine so you can simply focus on the sounds, not on life’s demands.
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4. Talk to God.
This may sound like the easiest part, but it may not be for everyone. Perhaps you have not communed with God for a long time. If you’re stuck, start with confession. Confess everything you feel is posing a barrier between you and God. A clean heart is always the best way to start your time together with God. Once you feel you have confessed it all, ask the Holy Spirit to direct you. Reveal to you any areas that you may have missed. Once that is complete, talk to God like a friend. The easiest way to achieve intimacy is to pretend as though he is there next to you. Talk to him about everything that is going on inside your heart, and you will feel like you are already getting closer to him.
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5. Journaling.
If talking out loud to God seems strange, consider writing in a journal. If I’m honest, journaling is my least favorite discipline. But journaling allows freedom from our busy minds by writing down what is really going on in our hearts. If you are afraid someone will read it, throw away the pages once you are done. It will give you the peace of mind without sacrificing your privacy.
Carmen talks about devotional journaling in her article, "The Importance of Having a Devotion Journal (And How I Created My Own)."
"That's the place where I can take notes on what I'm reading, record prayer requests and answers, journal out my day and keep track of anything else that comes to mind while I'm sitting at the Lord's feet."
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6. Silence.
Now take a moment to listen.
No friendship is one-sided. Both parties have to take turns talking and listening. Allow God to speak to you. Maybe he will convict your heart of something that is impeding your relationship with God. Perhaps He will speak to your heart about a situation you have wanted an answer to for some time. Maybe He will pour out His spirit upon you, giving you a vision or revelation.
Maybe he will speak about nothing. This is ok! Don’t be concerned if you don’t get anything out your time together. Simply communing with God is enough. These disciplines are just that: disciplines. The more you practice them, the better you become at them.
I have only heard the audible voice of God once, but it was an amazing experience. Other times I have a deep sense in my gut that the Lord is speaking to me. The more you listen for God and obey what you hear (even if it seems odd at the time) the more God will entrust to you. This is how you get in tune with God. Like the dial on a radio, it needs to be adjusted to find the right station. Left alone, all it picks up is noise.
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"God wants to enjoy fellowship with his children."
God knows your heart. He knows when you are simply doing do something because you have to or because you want to. If you want to spend time with God, He will honor that. The more you try to connect, the more He will honor you by connecting with you too. Revelation 2:20 says, “I stand at the door and knock, anyone who opens the door I will come in and eat with Him and he with me.” The Lord wants the doors of our hearts to be open to him. In so doing, we invite deep communion and fellowship with God that mimics the relationship Jesus has with His disciples. Jesus began calling them His disciples, but by the time He died, he considered them His brothers.
God wants to enjoy fellowship with his children. The best way to do this is to make room for him in our lives and in our hearts.
Michelle S. Lazurek is an award-winning author, speaker, pastor's wife and mother. Winner of the Golden Scroll Children's Book of the Year, the Enduring Light Silver Medal and the Maxwell Award, she is a member of the Christian Author's Network and the Advanced Writers and Speakers Association. She is also an associate literary agent with Wordwise Media Services. For more information, please visit her website at michellelazurek.com.
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Originally published Thursday, 17 May 2018.
