Choosing Kindness in an Unkind World - Your Nightly Prayer - November 13

Choosing Kindness in an Unkind World

TONIGHT’S SCRIPTURE

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”
—Ephesians 4:32

SOMETHING TO PONDER

What does kindness look like? Is it the young man who politely says, “Yes, ma’am” and “No, sir”? Is it holding doors? Does it go further and cook funeral meals? Or is it about the stuff you don’t do—like telling Aunt Gladys what you actually think about her tater salad? 

Kindness oozes from those old shows, like The Andy Griffith Show. And who wouldn’t want to live in that world? 

But there’s often a shadow side to this kind of kindness. “Bless your heart” can hide an overwhelming bitterness. Polite words and smiles have been mastered to land like punches. What we often call kindness is really no more than a veneer of pleasantness. 

If we aren’t careful, we can read politeness into Paul’s words in Ephesians: “Be kind to one another.” The verses preceding this speak of being filled with bitterness, anger, slander, and malice. That last word is especially important. Malice wants harm for someone else. 

Kindness moves in the other direction. 

Biblical kindness doesn’t mean smiling while secretly resenting someone. It doesn’t mean avoiding hard conversations or pretending that sin and harm don't matter. It’s not about keeping everyone comfortable or even being pleasant. Kindness seeks the good of another person, even when that person hasn’t been particularly good or kind to us. 

We live in an incredibly unkind world. We might not even rise to the level of pleasantness. And that’s why what I said above matters so much. Being pleasant in an unkind world will stick out. And it is a step above our unkind world. But that’s not really the standard—the standard is that of Christ. 

Think of how God in Christ forgave us. It was while we were yet sinners that Christ died for us. It was when we were in rebellion against Him that He gave everything so that we could have life. Christ lived and died fighting for our greatest good. And that’s the standard. That is what it looks like to be kind. 

YOUR NIGHTLY PRAYER

Father, thank you for your kindness to me. I’m glad that it is more than a polite smile or a distant concern. You sought my good even when I was in rebellion to you. You sent your Son so that I could have life, making great sacrifices for me. I know that is what you mean when you tell me to be kind as well. I know that means that my kindness to others might be costly. 

Forgive me for settling for the appearance of kindness. It’s easy to be polite and be pleasant, but underneath I have bitterness growing. It’s easy to smile while wanting my best and not theirs. Make me more like Christ. Help me to seek the good of others, even when they haven’t been good to me.

Grant me the wisdom to know when kindness might mean having a difficult conversation. Let the kindness you have shown me in Christ reshape the way I treat others. Amen.

THREE THINGS TO MEDITATE UPON

Am I actually being kind, or am I simply being pleasant?
Think about a relationship where you have kept things polite on the surface. Ask God to show you what is happening beneath the surface. Is there bitterness or resentment bubbling underneath?

What would it look like to genuinely seek this person’s good?
Kindness does not always mean saying yes or “keeping the peace”. Sometimes another person’s good requires having a difficult conversation. And sometimes it means forgiving and swallowing the harm done to you. Ask God for wisdom to know the difference. And for the eyes to check your heart.

How has Christ’s kindness toward me changed the way I should treat others?
Remember that Christ sought your greatest good while you were still a sinner. Ask Him to make that same kind of active, costly goodness visible in you.

Reflect on tonight’s prayer and share how God met you there. Join the Your Nightly Prayer discussion on the Crosswalk Forum.

GO DEEPER:

Photo Credit: Unsplash/Ivan Mani

Mike Leake is husband to Nikki and father to Isaiah and Hannah. He is also the lead pastor at Calvary of Neosho, MO. Mike is the author of Torn to Heal and Jesus Is All You Need. His writing home is https://mikeleake.net and you can connect with him on Twitter @mikeleake. Mike has a new writing project at Proverbs4Today.

Now that you've prayed, are you in need of someone to pray for YOU? Click the button below!