"How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?" Psalm 13:1-2
My husband, a transitional pastor, often must seek new church opportunities when his contract ends. Because the contract typically runs 12 to 18 months, it is a constant challenge to discern what new church opportunities await him. The anticipation of waiting to see what church God has next always puts me under great stress. As someone who likes stability and consistency, the constant ambiguity of where we'll be next in ministry weighs heavily on me.
Because I have begun the ordination process with my denomination, taking a church opportunity outside it would mean I'd lose my license and the chance to complete it.
Although I thought I was OK with it, the deep sorrow in my heart told me otherwise. One night, I cried out to God. I poured my heart out to him. If I were honest, I felt as if God had forgotten me. It felt as if he played favorites. It felt as though he loved others more than me. It felt as though he gave me things only to take them away. In short, God felt cruel.
I got out of pen and paper and wrote out a Psalm of lament. I cried out to God through the pages of my notebook, telling him everything I felt. But then I asked him to speak about the situation. The Holy Spirit responded by letting me know he had not forgotten me. He was not done with me regarding my ordination, and I needed to trust him.
After I was done, the outpouring of my thoughts onto the paper—and the tears that accompanied them—was good for my soul. It felt cathartic, and I felt much better afterward.
The Psalms, as well as all Scripture, can provide great comfort in times of difficulty. David, the author of the Psalms, was a great model of what it means to cry out to God and pour out his heart. Instead of hiding his emotions or saying and praying the right words, David chooses to pour out his heart. He holds nothing back from God.
The best part about that is that when you read the Psalms, you realize God can handle it. He can handle our big emotions. He wants us to come to him, bearing our souls to him. God does not get upset with us when we cry out to him in sorrow and lament.
This is where the grieving process begins. The process of lament is cathartic and good for our souls. When we can truly pour out our hearts in sorrow to God about our situation and the feelings that accompany it, we draw closer to God like never before.
David was called a man after God's own heart for good reason. David held nothing back from God, and neither should we. If we want true, messy communion with God, we must draw close to him by pouring out our hearts to him. When we asked him for his comfort, God, the great healer, always delivers. Even if the situation does not turn out the way we hope, we can trust that God has heard our prayers. He hears our cries and, with compassion, consoles us in our grief. Even if we don't get what we pray for, God is sovereign enough to ensure the situation turns out for his glory and our good.
Take out a pen and paper and pour your heart out to God. Try to mimic the Psalms by crying out to God through questions. Ask God for his help. Then, close by asking God to speak into the situation, and then write out that response. This will be good for you to return to in the future to see not only the ways you cried out for intimacy with God, but also the ways he answered you powerfully.
Father, let us not hide our grief but rather give it to you. Let us be like David, men and women after your own heart. Let us truly grieve, pour our hearts out to you, and express our deepest emotions. In return, we ask that you would be the God of all comfort and replace our sorrow with joy. Amen.
Photo credit: ©GettyImages-B-C-Designs
Related Resource: Let Go, Trust, and Stay Rooted When Life Feels Unsteady
When life feels unsteady, many of us respond by holding tighter, trying harder, and carrying more than we were meant to bear. But Jesus offers a different way. In this episode of Unhurried Living, Gem Fadling is joined by Yvette Henry, writer, speaker, and author of Release, Rest, Remain, for a thoughtful conversation about learning to let go, trust God, and stay rooted in his presence when life feels overwhelming.
Drawing from Jesus’ words in John 15, this conversation explores what it means to release the pressure to hold everything together, rest in God’s love, and remain spiritually grounded in the middle of real life. Together, they reflect on spiritual exhaustion, the invitation to abide rather than strive, and how spiritual fruit grows naturally when we stay connected to God.
This episode is for anyone longing for peace, stability, and a deeper sense of trust when life feels uncertain. If this episode helps you recenter your work and life on God, be sure to follow Unhurried Living on Apple or Spotify so you never miss an episode!
Originally published Thursday, 12 March 2026.
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