March 5, 2018
Permission to Ache Freely
Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge. (Psalm 62:8, NIV).
Friend to Friend
The days drudged on after my mama died from cancer. In only 6 short months, her diagnosis had flipped, and she graduated to Heaven. I wasn’t ready. I’d never processed this kind of grief before. Each morning after her death required every ounce of my strength just to sit up in bed and drag my feet over the side, forcing them to hit the floor. The weight of losing her pressed into my soul and I continually feared losing my husband and children. Would God take them so quickly from me as He had her?
My feelings vacillated between fear, anger, and panic. For some reason, because I was mad at God, I thought He didn’t want to hear from me. Or maybe I was the one giving Him the cold shoulder. Either way, my prayer life? Nonexistent. But verses like today’s truth were hidden in my heart and God promises His Word will not return void. The Holy Spirit reminded me that God wants to hear from me, no matter how I feel.
Our Father longs for us to trust Him with everything. The Amplified Bible version explains today’s key verse like this:“Trust (confidently) in him at all times.” No matter the season, His desire is to be the One who holds our faith and puts it into action. We can do this with confidence because from the beginning of time, He has always kept His Word and always will.
As the psalmist declares, pouring out our hearts to him paves the path for healing in our hearts. When the words finally tumbled out in prayer and I started to tell God I was angry and fearful and worried, peace wasn’t instantaneous. But the more I voiced my frustrations and admitted my outrage, the more clarity His Word and Spirit ushered in. I realized prayer was so much more powerful than panic. Psalm 142:5 became my mantra. “I cried out to You, O Lord; I said, “You are my refuge, My portion in the land of the living.” My portion. Enough to get me through that moment of swinging my feet over the side of the bed and planting my feet on the ground, confidently trusting that my Heavenly Father would lead me through each step for the day.
God is our refuge. Just like a mother who wants to be the first to hear about her child’s tough day, He longs to be our hideout, hiding place, and hideaway. As a shelter from the storm, He wraps his arms around us and reminds us of His beautiful promises. That He will always transform evil into good. That His ear is ever listening to the cries of our hearts. That prayer trumps panic. Every. Time.
Dear Father, I’m hurting, and I don’t really want to talk to you about my feelings. I know you already know them, but the pain is so great. Help me remember the truth of Your Word. Give me the ability to recognize that pouring my heart out to You is the path to peace.
In Jesus’ Name,
Now It’s Your Turn
Are you prone to panic in the midst of pain? What would happen if you remember to lift up a simple prayer when panic strikes?
More from the Girlfriends
Interested in learning more about how to pray in the midst of pain? Download “Permission to Ache Freely,” the first chapter in Rachel’s book, One More Step: Finding Strength When You Feel Like Giving Up, for free!
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Originally published Monday, 05 March 2018.