June 23, 2008
More Than One Special Day
Genesis 2:24, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife; and they shall be one flesh.” (KJV)
I overhead a lady talking, commenting how she had carefully chosen her wedding dress, the cake and the color of the bridesmaid’s dresses. I thought she had it all planned out until she exclaimed; “Now I just need someone to marry!” Apparently she had made plans for everything except the most important thing – the husband! I was surprised by her comment, but understood her desire for a fairy tale wedding. As a young girl, I also dreamed of my wedding day and remember spending hours browsing the pages of bride’s magazines. Then after four years of dating my fiancé, and a lot of planning, we did have a beautiful wedding.
However, once the honeymoon was over, real life happened! We had to go to work every day; pay bills; stick to budgets; do housework; repair the car; change diapers; and handle parenting issues. As a result of real life occurring, we began to complain about work; quarrel about child rearing; accuse each other of not doing their fair share; fuss over money management; and exhibit little tolerance for each other’s habits. I came to realize that all those elegant pictures in the bride’s magazines didn’t portray marriage at all - they only portrayed a picture of one special day. I had been unknowingly persuaded by the media into thinking that the primary focus was planning for a great wedding, instead of planning for a great marriage.
Our culture today seems to put more focus on that one special day than they do the years that will be spent together. On the other hand, the scriptures say almost nothing about weddings, but they do say a great deal about marriage and the importance of Christ-centeredness. God desires that we reach for His book to plan for our marriages, long before we reach for trendy magazines to plan our weddings. Although in God’s Book we won’t find any suggestions for tropical honeymoon destinations, we will find recommendations for how to love our husbands when real life happens. We won’t find fancy pictures of white gowns and flower arrangements, but we will discover pages that are filled with romantic love stories, advice for being a loving wife, and tools for building a Christ-centered relationship.
Scripture makes clear God desires marriage to be a lifetime commitment. When real life happens, however, the enemy can persuade us to think that breaking our commitment would be easier than hanging in there. God yearns for us to understand that we can find happiness and contentment in our marriage – though it may not look like the pages of the bridal magazines – if He remains our focus.
In our key verse today, the word “cleave” means “to adhere to.” So, in other words, we are to hold together – through the special days and the not so special days. This isn’t always easy, but Christ can be the glue that holds us together.
Marriage is not a fairy tale wedding, it is real life. A successful marriage can’t be built from a bride’s magazine, but from God’s book. We can win the battle against the enemy who wishes to destroy our marriages, if we cling to the Bible as our instruction book for marriage. Whether you are a bride-to-be, or have been married forty years, pick up God’s Word today with excitement! Browse through the pages, searching for the beauty that a Christ-centered marriage can offer. A marriage offers so much more than one special day.
Dear Lord, please help us to honor our commitment to marriage, despite the challenges that we face. Give us the courage and strength to deal with challenging relationship issues and a passionate desire to build a strong Christ centered marriage. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas
What a Husband Needs from His Wife by Melanie Chitwood
Visit Tracie Miles’ blog
Read the Song of Solomon; 1 Corinthians 13; and 2 Corinthians 6:14-15.
For brides to be:
- Am I spending more time planning my wedding, than preparing my heart for a Christ-centered marriage?
- Does my future husband seek a Christ-centered marriage?
- Can I honor my marriage commitment by changing my attitude or perspective in some way?
- Am I making Christ a priority in my marriage?
Ephesians 4:2-3, “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” (NIV)
© 2008 by Tracie Miles. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
Matthews, NC 28105
Originally published Monday, 23 June 2008.