Encouragement for Today - June 1, 2005


June 1

Encouragement for Today


“The Triple-A Club of Marriage”

Sharon Jaynes, Vice President of Proverbs 31 Ministries Radio


Key Verse:


Philippians 2:1-2, “If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose.” (NIV)




Are you and your husband safeguarded and well-kept by the Triple-A’s of marriage? 






Every man desperately longs for his woman to adore, admire, and appreciate him.  Too many times we walk down the aisle with a striking resemblance to Snow White, but then somehow we turn into the wicked queen.  If that’s the case in your home, fear not!  The story’s not over yet.  You can make a commitment today to adore, admire, and appreciate your man by giving him your BEST (bless him, edify him, share with him, and touch him).


Where do men go to be admired and appreciated?  They all go somewhere.  They go to work with the hopes of hearing “job well done.”  They go to the ball field in hopes of hearing “way to go, man.”  They go back to their mothers to hear “I’m so proud of you, son.”  They work late with the hopes of getting a few compliments from the gals at the office.  They feast on the compliments of patients or clients.  They hang out at the gym flexing and building their biceps to be told they are strong.  Where does your man go to be admired? How wonderful when that place is in your heart, in your arms, in your home.


Adoration:  What does it mean to adore your husband?  Basically, it means to love him with all your heart…and let him know it.  In fact, you become the mirror in which he sees himself. 


Admiration:  Dr. Willard Harley says, “When a woman tells a man she thinks he’s wonderful, that inspires him to achieve more.  He sees himself as capable of handling new responsibilities and perfecting skills far above those of his present level.  That inspiration helps him prepare for the responsibilities of life.  For some men – those with fragile self-images – admiration also helps them believe in themselves.  While criticism causes men to become defensive, admiration energizes and motivates them.” 


Appreciation:  Dr. Harley continues, “A woman needs to appreciate her husband for what he already is, not for what he could become, if he lived up to her standards.  When she tells him that she appreciates him for what he has done, it gives him more satisfaction than he receives from his paycheck.”  Men thrive on appreciation.


My Prayer for Today:


Lord, help me to look past the mundane, the everyday, and the insignificant details of my husband’s life to see his gifts, strengths and talents.  May my words be sweet to his ears, touching his heart to bring a new freshness of life to our relationship.  Through me, may he know that he is adored, admired and appreciated as a Child of God.  May my words draw him closer to You everyday.


Application Steps:


1.  Do you want to see your husband’s face light up like a full moon?  Adore him.  Tell him you are amazed that he knows how to __________, or that you are impressed by his__________, and then sit back and watch him glow. 


2.  If you have been withholding admiring words from your man, it may feel strange to begin.  First and foremost, be authentic – be real.  If you contrive admiring words, he will be able to tell.  Start with one compliment or a word of appreciation.  It may be as simple as “thank you,” and soon the admiration will begin to flow.


3.  Men need to know that they are appreciated.  If your husband works so that you can stay at home, tell him you appreciate his dedication to being the provider for the family.  Look for ways to compliment him every day.  Pay attention and take note of his appearance, behavior, and character qualities.  Focus on the positive in each of these, then sprinkle a few compliments his way. 


Note: For some, your husband may become confused or seem skeptical with this sudden showering of praise.  If that is his reaction, just say, “I’d forgotten what a wonderful man I’m married to and I’m realizing it more and more every day!”


Reflection Points:


Is your relationship with your man characterized by criticism, sarcasm, and/or verbal jabs?  If so, you have a lot of weeds to pull.  As a matter of fact, some deep-rooted weeds have a tenacious way of sprouting up time and time again.  If this is the case, be patient with him, yourself, and persevere in continually applying weed killer (words of admiration) for as long as it takes for them to die at the root.


Power Verses:


1 Thessalonians 4:18, “Therefore encourage each other with these words.” (NIV)


1 Thessalonians 5:12-13, “Now we ask you [sisters], to respect those who work hard among you, who are over you in the Lord and who admonish you.  Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work.  Live in peace with each other.” (NIV)


Hebrews 3:13, “But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.”  (NIV)


Related Resources:


Becoming the Woman of His Dreams, by Sharon Jaynes



Capture His Heart, by Lysa TerKeurst



The Power of a Praying Wife, by Stormie Omartian



Originally published Wednesday, 01 June 2005.