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Proverbs 31 Ministries is a non-denominational, non-profit Christian ministry that seeks to lead women into a personal relationship with Christ. With Proverbs 31:10-31 as a guide, Proverbs 31 Ministries reaches women right in the middle of their busy day through free daily devotions, radio program, speaking events, conferences, monthly magazine, resources, online communities, and Gather and Grow groups. We are real women offering real-life solutions to women who are striving to maintain life’s balance, in spite of today’s hectic pace and cultural pull away from godly principles. Wherever a woman may be on her spiritual journey, Proverbs 31 Ministries exists to be a trusted friend who takes her by the hand and walks by her side, leading her one step closer to the heart of God.

Encouragement for Today - December 15, 2011

Encouragement for Today - December 15, 2011


Lysa TerKeurst

December 15, 2011

Affair Proof Your Mind
Lysa TerKeurst

"Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak." Matthew 26:41 (NIV 1984)

As a woman thinks...so she eventually acts.

A few years ago I watched a friend get tangled up in an emotional affair.

She was a strong Christian woman who loved her family but the attraction to this other man seemed unavoidable. She tried to talk herself out of it but her heart played tricks on her mind and the justifications for letting things go just a little further soon led her to a very dangerous place. She was becoming emotionally attached to this other man.

In a moment of desperation and fear, she confided in me what was going on.

As she described how she got pulled into this place, I found myself being challenged by the realization of how subtly this had happened. She hadn't planned on being emotionally attracted to this other man. As a matter of fact, she'd always prided herself on being a woman of strong conviction and had scoffed at the idea of ever being tempted to have an affair.

It starts off simple enough - a comment made that you mull over one too many times, a conversation in which you find a surprising connection, a glance that lingers just a second too long, or one of a thousand other interactions that seem innocent yet aren't. These are the dangerous seeds that can easily sprout into an emotional affair.

Some think it is a safe way to enjoy the lure of being attracted to someone other than your spouse without crossing any lines. But God boldly and plainly says in 1 Corinthians 6:18, "Flee from sexual immorality." God doesn't say walk away from sexual immorality. No, He says to flee as if your very life is at stake!

Our thoughts are so powerful. If we want to affair proof our marriages, we must make our thoughts work for us instead of against us.

The time to prevent an emotional affair is before it ever starts.

We must never assume it could never happen to me. We are all just a few poor choices away from doing things we never thought we would.

Jesus warned his disciples in Matthew 26: 41,"Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak."

The Life Application NIV Bible commentary says, "Jesus used Peter's drowsiness to warn him about the kinds of temptation he would soon face. The way to overcome temptation is to keep watch and pray. Watching means being aware of the possibilities of temptation, sensitive to the subtleties, and spiritually equipped to fight it."

I now realize that I need to be aware that I am just as prone to this temptation as anyone. One of the best ways to be watchful is to be praying with and for my husband. We need to be open and honest about meeting each other's needs and investing wisely in our marriage.

Sensitive to the Subtleties:
I will have to be honest with myself that temptations do exist. When another man says or does something I wish my husband would say or do and doesn't, it can make me lessen my husband in my heart and build up this other man. This is a seed of poison.

Spiritually Equipped:
I must park my mind with the truth and the truth is I am married to an amazing man. He is not perfect and sometimes our marriage can be hard, but I made a commitment to him in a covenant before God and there are no biblical reasons in our marriage why we should ever part.

My friend did the hardest but wisest thing she could have done in telling me about her emotional affair. It helped her to see she needed to flee and have someone else hold her accountable. But it also helped me. Her admission made me aware and alert to the dangers lurking in any kind of unhealthy emotional connection with another man.

Dear Lord, may I forever treasure my marriage and see it worthy to be protected. Help me to be a courageous woman who absolutely flees from any and every situation where there is even a hint of danger. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
For a creative idea to improve the communication and connection in your marriage, click here to read more on Lysa's blog.

If you want simple tips to improve your marriage, you'll want to read the marriage books Lysa has written - Capture His Heart (for wives to read) and Capture Her Heart (for husbands to read).

Come see the downloadable Freebies on Lysa's website! Encouraging articles for lots of situations to print and share with a friend! www.LysaTerKeurst.com

Your purchase through Proverbs 31 Ministries supports the many areas of hope-giving ministry we provide at no cost. We wish we could, but we simply can't compete with prices offered by huge online warehouses. Therefore, we're so grateful for every purchase you make with us. Thank you!

Application Steps:
The time to prevent an emotional affair is before it ever starts. Confide in a friend or mentor to help hold you accountable in this area.

Our thoughts are so powerful. If we want to affair proof our marriages, we must make our thoughts work for us instead of against us.

Power Verses:
Proverbs 31:10, "A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies." (NIV)

© 2011 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries
616-G Matthews-Mint Hill Road
Matthews, NC 28105

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