August 11, 2010
"God heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds."
Psalm 147:3 (NIV)
A few girlfriends recently confided to me about past wounds that still hurt. One sweet friend shared how she has worked for over 20 years to heal from the wounds inflicted by harsh words. "My mother always thought I was too heavy and called me her elephant. She was constantly making comparisons between my much smaller sister and me. She even went so far as to accuse me of being bulimic, which was a crushing blow to a 13-year old girl."
My other friend confided, "My mom's friend asked me what it was like to have a sister who was so pretty and then said how difficult it must be growing up with her, so beautiful and tiny, and me not being that way. I wasn't fat; it's just we are built completely different. I remember being surprised that someone would actually say that to me and wondered WHY she would say it. That one comment defined me for many years and still hurts when I think about it today."
Beauty wounds. Every single one of us has them. Some inflict deep pain and others prove to be a little nasty pinch that bothers us from time to time; regardless, all of them hurt.
There are many things that need to take place in order to heal our innermost being and assure we don't get caught in the habit of repeating this behavior with those we love or even those we don't know well.
It is important to extend grace and forgiveness to those who have wounded us. I know this can be easier said than done, but through Christ it is possible. Often the one who brought us pain has no idea the heartache they have caused. I often wonder whom I could have hurt without meaning to, and I hope and pray they forgive me for my thoughtless actions.
The Bible tells us words are powerful, but so are our thoughts. We often give too much value to the destructive dialogue that runs in our head from past wounds. We listen to the hurtful thoughts that play over and over like a broken record. The moment these thoughts pop up, we need to put an end to them by taking them captive. We need to immediately replace the wounded thinking with something more powerful and loving.
One thing that has helped me is to have scripture verses ready in my mind to shut down those damaging head games. For instance, when a critical thought about my beauty or my weight comes into my mind, I try to realize it and immediately say, "The king is enthralled by [my] beauty" (Psalm 45:11,NIV).
Dear God, I know You see the deepest places of my heart and know the lies and words that continue to haunt me and hurt me. Will You take that hurt away, please? Heal me and help me to accept and understand that You didn't make a mistake with me. You made me perfectly wonderful. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
Good Girls Don't Have to Dress Bad by Shari Braendel
Visit Shari's blog for more encouragement and some fun fashion tips.
1. Print out Psalm 139:13-14 and post it on your mirror. Let it be a daily reminder that you belong to God. Read it every day until that is what you hear inside your heart and mind.
2. Pray and ask God to help you forgive those who have inflicted pain upon you.
3. Choose this day to begin the healing process.
Would you want to be granted the forgiveness that another may need from you if you were in the same situation?
Is there a time you can remember being forgiven whether you deserved it or not? There is freedom in forgiveness that touches all parties involved.
Genesis 1:27, "So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. (NIV)
2 Corinthians 3:9, "I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters," says the Lord Almighty." (NIV)
Psalm 139:13-14, "For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother's womb. I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well." (NASB)
© 2010 by Shari Braendel. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
616-G Matthews-Mint Hill Road
Matthews, NC 28105