A Holy Urging
Café Menu for Friday, March 11, 2016
Today’s Special is: Mom-o-logues Should Be Encouragement, Not Chastisement
Carefully prepared just for you by your friend, Robin Jones
All praise to the God and Father of our Master, Jesus the Messiah! Father of all mercy! God of all healing counsel! He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us. We have plenty of hard times that come from following the Messiah, but no more so than the good times of his healing comfort—we get a full measure of that, too.
2 Corinthians 1:3–5 MSG
… And boom… There it was. The lie I knew she had told revealed itself.
Internal Mom-o-logue voice,
Robin, girl, be still. Watch the face. No judgy face. Keep your eyes soft and caring. You don’t want to scare her away from this moment. It doesn’t matter that you knew it. She needs to know that she is valuable. That she has been heard. That she isn’t the only one. That she is loved. That she doesn’t have to settle.
I heard myself gently say,
Sweetie, you are worth more than that.
I didn’t remember everything that I said that night, but my daughter did.
She remembered that I didn’t get angry because she hadn’t been totally honest.
She remembered that I was vulnerable with her and was willing to share my own failings.
She remembered that I posed important questions that she used to prayerfully evaluate her own behavior.
She remembered that I shared Scripture that she could employ going forward.
The mom moments I am most proud of are the ones where I let the Holy Spirit lead and speak. The ones where I choose to be a conduit of God’s perfect encouragement instead of my flawed, judgy chastisement.
The Holy Spirit is our Paraclete, our Helper, our Advocate. We see Him working in Scripture when we see the words “encourage or comfort” or in the Greek, “paraklesis”.
According to Strong’s, the Greek word “paraklesis” means a calling to one’s aid, encouragement, or comfort. It is used in 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 as comfort from the God of comfort. We are to comfort others, or as Strong’s further defined, use a “Holy Urging” to provide aid.
That night, I chose not to let pride block the Holy Spirit’s urging to my daughter. That night she heard the Holy Spirit breathe away the defeat and shame she was feeling. She heard Him whisper,
Dear one, you are worth so much more than that. You are my treasure, my masterpiece. Treat yourself as such so that you may draw others to me.
Parents of older teens and young adults follow these steps:
H—hold your judgment.
You aren’t their judge. You are their brother or sister in Christ. Love them by listening first.
E—empathize with them.
People don’t care what you know until they know you care, especially our own children - young or old.
A—anger, don’t allow it.
Anger is only an outflow of your pride. Humble yourself. Share a relatable and relevant story of your own young life.
R—raise them up.
Ask good questions that they can use. Give them the comfort of Scripture that helped encourage you in the same situations when you were young.
Lord, You love us so. You treasure us. Let us speak life to those around us. Let us H.E.A.R. them. Let us encourage those who are going through experiences that are similar to our own journeys. Let us raise others up with the comfort You have given us. May we always have Your Holy Urging on our lips. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
© 2016 by Robin Jones. All rights reserved.
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Originally published Friday, 11 March 2016.