Originally published Friday, 27 February 2015.
Do you ever feel stagnant? Like you are trying to accelerate, but going nowhere? What do you do when you feel stuck?
I know I can sometimes feel this way, I wonder, "Am I making a difference? Serving a purpose? Changing lives? Impacting the world? Is my life adding up to anything meaningful?"
Normally it's when I have been rejected and I feel dejected,
or when I am down and start looking around,
or when I see the progress of man and start feeling like a scam.
It's these times that I feel like a car just spinning it's wheels - spinning round and round - but getting nowhere. I push and I push - but somehow I still stay stuck. No matter how hard I slam that gas pedal, I still have no idea where I am headed.
It's aggravating. Frustrating. Demoralizing.
It doesn't matter if I steer in the right direction, because the only direction I feel I am headed is - nowhere.
For much of my life, I sludged around in the mud. I worked in jobs that never satisfied. I arrived with a smile - and left with a frown. I felt purposeless. Passionless. And, disappointed in myself.
During this time, I realized:
To live without cause, is to feel like a fraud.
To not make a difference, is to become indifferent.
To fake like you're okay is to put on a good play.
To not see results, is a personal insult.
But, this is not how God intends us to live. God desires us to be authentic, patient and enduring.
Yet, so many days, I return to this place of "stuck". I may want bigger progress. More lives changed. I may want to do better spiritually. Or to be a better mom. Or to have deeper relationships. Or I want to feel closer to God.
Often, I just feel stuck.
But, God's best sermons aren't delivered at church they are delivered during these moments - these moments of "stuck".
It is here where we are forced to wait and be still.
It is here where we can focus - on Him.
It's in these places of "wait" where God's work really gets started. This muddy ground is his best working ground. It is here, where he transforms us and molds us - growing us in patience, endurance and perseverance.
Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. (Romans 5:3-4)
It's here we grow and sow. As we grow in patience we sow faith. As we let go of fear (often the fear of mediocrity), true purpose surfaces. It is here we find - our calling.
The bottom line of any true calling is pleasing and serving the Lord.
The second we let go of fear and indifference - we start making a difference.
We start to understand that he is at work -
in us - instead of us demanding to have him work - through us.
Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. (John 15:4)
God is training you for greatness.
He is sovereign over all.
He is working his plan from beginning to end even when you can't see it.
He is always at work.
Just because you can't see doesn't mean he can't.
He decides the proper time to exalt us.
We can wait on him. Even if that time of exaltation is at heavens door, we can still trust in his plan.
Let's not miss the moment. Because the most important calling for our lives is not the one we dream of - but the one that he has already placed in front of us for this exact moment.
Let's call out to the Lord. He will help us. His words will guide us.
Because when we stop focusing on us, and our circumstances - and we start focusing on him and his glory - this is when we see things through a new light.
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you. (Ps. 32:8)
Our wheels will stop spinning, our gas pedal finally gets a brake and our lives start moving forward, because God is at work to move us to destinations we never expected.