Are you as hard on yourself as I am?
So, last night I met with a bunch of women. With one of them . . .let's just say I was a little overzealous to connect. My mouth got ahead of my mind and I blurted out some totally weird comment. Later, when saying good-bye, I uttered an I-don't-know-what-to-say-so-I'll-complain comment.
"Oh, I've got to head-out. I've got to wake up at 5:30 AM to be with my kids."
I rolled my eyes.
Why? I have no idea why. I have no idea why I just released a complainy comment in my awkward absence of words. But, I did. It came out of nowhere. Ever done that?
Well, these little mishaps didn't end at that get-together. I got in the car and felt all guilty about me. I questioned what kind of Christian I am. I wondered why I can't do things right. I kept wondering if the women thought less of me or if I seemed odd.
Do you ever question yourself? Constantly?
Jesus doesn't do this to us. This is not his voice. He doesn't tail us like we do. He doesn't chase us at our heels saying, "Why did you do that? You really messed up this time. You really don't know how to be like me, do you?"
Jesus doesn't do this. We do.
What if we were to give ourselves a break? Like Paul does when he addresses the early believers and says, "Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ."
What if we were to say to ourselves, in the heat of our self-hating moments, "Grace and peace to me, right now, from God my Father and the Lord Jesus Christ."
And then, we let it in. What hooks might come out of our skin? What new places might our heart move to? What truth may we begin to swim in because we give our mind free reign to consider something other than self-condemnation?
It's okay to be hungry for grace. Horribly. Desperately. Ravagely hungry for it.
Jesus knew we needed it. It's why he died on the cross. Because we'll never be perfect. We'll never be spot-on. We'll never be without fault.
We need him and we need grace. What if you gave yourself a break today and received his peace and grace so much that it set your mind free to receive Him?
Or, book Kelly to speak at your next women's event or conference.