Originally published Monday, 02 November 2015.
I have experienced and written about the spirit of rejection before, so you would think that I would recognize it when it rears its ugly head in my life.
I woke up this morning crying after having a very vivid, heart-piercing dream. It was almost as if my current heart-struggle was being played out right before me; I could actually see this dream happening in reality.
The words that were spoken (in the dream) to me and my husband cut to the core, and they hurt so badly that my first reaction were tears so strong that they stained my cheeks when I awoke.
Being a story-teller allows for intense dream-tales in my mind while I’m supposed to be resting, sleeping. It’s something I have always dealt with since I was a child- I wake up trying to shake the mental visions, telling myself over and over again that it’s not real.
That’s not how they really feel about you.
You would never actually do that.
He won’t leave you.
That will never actually happen.
She would never say that to you.
You are safe.
You are protected.
You are loved.
Eventually, the emotions fade, and I can go on with the rest of my day.
But sometimes, the core issue of the dream lingers with questions.
Is the message of the dream prophetic- from the Lord?
Am I supposed to pray about/for this situation/person?
Most of the time, I have a pretty good idea how to proceed, especially if I remember such specific details.
In this morning’s instance, as I was walking our dog, Samson, the tears kept flowing, and I just began to talk to God. It was very obvious and simple- I was still dealing with rejection and it still hurt.
I did all I knew to do; I attempted to break the silence that so easily crept into the friendship, and there’s still silence on the other end.
I can’t make anyone want to have me in their life, and not everyone needs to be in mine, I get that. But I’m still fighting off the feelings that the spirit of rejection so gladly ushers into my heart.
It’s in these moments that I cling to those who embrace me, who accept me, and remind myself that I am loved.
First and foremost: Jesus loves me.
My husband loves me.
My son loves me.
My family loves me.
And there are friends that surround me that fight for our relationship.
There is a friend that sticks closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24).
Although Proverbs 18:24 doesn’t necessarily say that friend is Jesus, I know that He will always be there for me even when everyone else fails me.
Because people will fail me. People will reject me. Even some of my Christian brothers and sisters- this of which I struggle with understanding the most.
Many people rejected Jesus (and continue to do so), but while He was here on earth, even one of His very own disciples (Judas) rejected Him. And just a couple hours later, another one of His closest disciples (Peter) rejected knowing Him. THREE TIMES.
Thank God for Jesus’ forgiveness when we turn our backs on Him; He gives us so many opportunities to repent and make things right in our relationship with Him!
Every single person He died for- the whole world-rejects Him and His ways constantly.
So no matter what, Jesus understands more than anyone what we experience when rejection comes our way.
Just like a little girl who reaches for mommy or daddy when she falls and scrapes her knee, I need to run to my Daddy.
He understands and His arms are open wide, ready to let me cry on His shoulder.
I’m hurting. I don’t want to hold onto this pain.
I want to heal. I choose to forgive.
I want You to bless those who hurt me, even if they don’t want me in their life anymore.
Your Son was rejected, even by You, for a moment, out of love for me. Thank You, Jesus, for being the friend I need who sticks by me no matter what.
I love You. Thank You for always loving me.
If you are dealing with rejection, I want to encourage you that you don’t have to embrace the lies that you are unwanted or unloved. There is a Man who wants to be the closest friend you have ever had in your entire life. Everything could be stripped away from you or everyone in your life may walk away from you, but the Lord’s love for you will always be there.
…be content with what you have, for He has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” So we can confidently say,
“The Lord is my helper;
I will not fear;
what can man do to me?” (Hebrews 13:5-6 ESV)
Man may reject you, but you can reject those feelings of inadequacy or unworthiness right now. In Christ, you are made worthy before God. The Cross is a symbol of God’s great love for you. Jesus died and paid the price for our sin so that we would forever experience a relationship with our Heavenly Father. Without a relationship with Jesus, you’re a sinner in God’s Holy eyes, but embracing Jesus, ushers in the greatest relationship you will ever know from now on into eternity. He wants to walk with you. He won’t reject you. Will you take His hand and follow Him?
Check out more of my blogs on www.emilyrosemassey.com! Also, visit my website for more information on how to stay connected with me, as well as info about my book Yielded in His Hands- now available on Amazon.com!