Originally published Monday, 11 June 2012.
My prayer time goes through a lot of different iterations, almost one for every season it seems. For awhile I had a really in-depth prayer binder, but eventually the big rings got in the way of my writing and I looked for something different. Then I moved my prayer time onto a little throw rug that I put at the foot of my bed and sat on. Then I got tired of sitting on the floor and moved to a couch.
I've gone through lots of different notebooks, giving one up halfway through to try another one. I used to crank up soul-full music and have it playing during my times of prayer, but at some point I felt it was distracting rather than compelling. I used to keep a journal on my computer that I typed in nearly everyday, noting what I was learning and inspiring thoughts I'd come across in my readings. But after a couple of years, eventually that too fell by the wayside.
Sometimes I feel a little guilty about this stop-and-go approach. Guilty that I lack follow-through with my best-laid plans.
And its in those moments that I'm quietly reminded that that's not what this is about. This is simply about spending time with the Lord and getting to know who he is and what he says and what he wants. And how I do that, how my tastes and preferences change and warp, doesn't matter as much as the simple fact that I am doing this.
Change isn't a bad thing. Perhaps that's just how I'm wired, to switch things up again. If I take a step back, I can see that that's the case when it comes to many other things, whether it's switching up my decor, renewing my wardrobe or searching out new menu plans.
The perfectionist in me is always thinking about how I can make something function better, looking for areas to tweak or test out new options. I'm not afraid to stop something halfway through or admit defeat if it means I at least gave it a try.
It's this perspective that I accept and latch on to, not the one dripping with guilt.
Then, I look down at my Bible and the little leaflet that sticks from its pages. Dates are marked off, one after another. In spite of all those changes, I've still managed to use the same Bible plan that I started at the beginning of the year—even managing to get ahead a few days when I got to the parts about the wars and prophecies.
Right now, I have a small ringed notebook where I write out my prayer requests for certain topics and people. In the back, I am keeping lists of memorable Scripture verses I come across in my daily reading. And I sit on the couch or on the rug that is splayed before it, and I speak to my Lord—what it's all about in the first place.
Carmen writes the blog, Life Blessons, which provides an intimate look into her life as a twentysomething woman as she details her experiences learning how to live out her faith, enjoy the simple things in life and be the woman God created to her to be.
Along the way, she shares the blessings and lessons that are a part of this journey, the things she likes to call her "blessons."
Feel free to read more at her blog, Life Blessons.
Related Posts from Life Blessons
Selecting a Bible Reading Plan for the New Year
How a 3-ring binder has changed the way I pray and spend time with God