Being a good mom is hard work.
It means being patient, kind and loving.
It means not pulling my hair out when I can't get one second alone.
It means not having a second to do one little task without being tackled.
It means answering the same question, in the same way, for the 100th time.
Motherhood takes will power to be good and life takes amazing power to endure.
Many times, I just don't have it. But, I pretend I do. So, I load myself up with a lot of excuses to make my insides not feel like my outsides.
I try to tell myself - any mom, would get annoyed!
"Moms look at their cell phones all the time."
"It's natural to want to hide when things get tough."
"If they would act right, I would too."
"At least I am better than the worst time."
"I did that because they have to learn how to act right."
Excuses are funny.
Aren't excuses really just little sweet lies covered with a smile?
They're chocolate on the outside, yet have arsenic on the inside.
Crutches that keep us in sin?
We walk with them, but we stumble over ourself again and again never really getting anywhere.
Hinderances to our recovery?
We demand that we look fully recovered, but we don't let God have the chance to heal us.
I am tired of barriers. Barriers just block us out for God's great promised land of joy waiting for us. Every time. They. Block. Us. Out.
With this, on this very good day, this very good day that cost one so much. I plead with God to help me take down all the boundaries that keep me from him.
I am humbled at the thought of him.
One who walked the road to Calvary with no excuses.
One who could have said, "Why should I die for those sinners, I am so much better than that."
Or "I'm not doing a thing for them, for who have mocked me, tormented me and beat me."
But, he didn't utter excuses at the cross.
Instead he carried our load, he carried our cross, he endured the shame and the pain and didn't run the other way. He took it all so that we could take our place next to him in heaven.
He is entirely good. No pretenses. No facades. No excuses. Simply good.
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)
I praise God that he is good. Because in him, I am good too. I am released from all excuses and free to accept his free grace. My inadequacies are covered.
No excuse is every required, because whatever it is I am trying to excuse is already covered. In this, I am free to bring everything to him without shame, without regret and with a humble heart. In his hands, he will change my ways and help me to be more than myself.
The LORD is good to all; he has compassion on all he has made. (Ps. 145:9)
Free grace is continually poured out due to his goodness. Abundant love is always being extended due to his sacrifice. My life will never be the same; he marked all days as "good enough". My days are forever changed.
Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good. His love endures forever. (Ps. 136:1)