I have been on a wild and crazy hunt to figure out how to get more of God - into me.
It's wild because I often live in the wilderness - in the rocky ups and downs of faith. It's just wild that a great God like him would want to dive into the disobedient heart of a girl like me. My head says yes, but sometimes, my heart says, it's too off his beaten path.
It's crazy because, I can't even conceive how someone so "everywhere" and "always", so above-it-all and so robe-laden, someone who made everything and with so much to do, could want to reside in measly me? Aren't there a lot more exciting and missional places that he wants to focus?
But, it's true.
God practically offers us all of him on a golden platter saying, I give you my heart. Will you take it? He doesn't offer a part, a sliver, a shard, a splinter; he takes his whole body and throws it on the table for us, for vulture-like beings who did nothing to earn his gift of death.
"Take and eat; this is my body." Mt. 26:26
He offers, but do I even value his gift?
The truth is the presence of his body, his life and his power is the greatest gift I could ever receive.
But, I must make a choice to eat his spiritual nourishment.
When my stomach turns in knots,
when holes trip me up,
when I shake in the darkness,
I must look up, verses looking around and see the one who is always ready to be found.
He is always ready to lead me in right ways.
His hand leads to truth.
Truth leads to love.
Love leads to fearlessness.
Fearlessness leads to passion and joy.
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. 1 Jo. 4:8
I wonder how often I hold back me - from God?
I wonder how much I fear his presence in me
because he seems too great above me?
How often I fear condemnation?
Even though I know his condemnation doesn't even exist for me (Ro 8:1).
I forget "he who began a good work will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." (Phil. 1:6)
How often do you hold back because you feel unworthy?
Or try to gain worthiness?
Even though it's impossible to be the weight lifter of his power.
Only one can carry (and carried) that weight.
that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. Eph. 3:16-17
The reality is, we need to the strength of the Spirit
so that we can welcome in the strength of the Savior.
Then, the strength of the Savior more and more pushes out
the strength of the sinner.
It's like the Spirit does the internal cleaning,
so the temple is clean, prepared and ready to be inhabited.
Jesus silences sins through surrendered faith. The sinner is siphoned away and more and more the new creation takes over. The sinner's fears are left in the dust; the Spirit and Jesus become the only ones to trust.
I want this to happen more and more for me, don't you? This happens when we call on the power of the Spirit to expand the territory of the Savior.
It doesn't matter where you live - in the wilderness, in trials, in temptation, in sin - confess and call. That's it.
Then we will find the power of God will move in - to move out - all that keeps us from him.
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