Bonnie Gray is author of Finding Spiritual Whitespace: Awakening Your Soul To Rest, garnering starred review praise from Publisher's Weekly, named as one of PW's top 6 notable new religion authors. Bonnie is a featured contributor at (in)courage and her writing is nationally syndicated, spotlighted by Relevant Magazine, Catalyst Leadership, Today's Christian Woman, and Christianity Today. A UCLA graduate, Bonnie has been a missionary, ministry entrepreneur and Silicon Valley high-tech professional. Bonnie serves up shots of faith for the daily grind on her blog Faith Barista.com. Bonnie lives in Northern California with her husband Eric and their two sons.
If you've ever pursued a God-sized dream, you will be challenged to do what doesn't come naturally. You'll be challenged to walk by faith.
I was driving late to an appointment and getting antsy at each stoplight. There had been something bugging me for a while that I couldn't shake.
I was discouraged about some dreams I'd been pursuing.
I had hit some roadblocks and I was stalled.
So I decided to talk with someone who counsels people through transitions and grab a cup of coffee. I was curious to get her perspective.
Putting plans in place to get things done has always been my thing. I had carved out a career in high tech getting teams to produce products doing just that. I liked planning and measuring progress. I got good at meeting goals.
But, the dreams I'm talking about don't reach success through executing plans.
These dreams are God-sized dreams.
God-sized dreams defy control and only survive on one ingredient: faith.
The more I want to make progress, the more I get discouraged. It's like a safety mechanism God puts into the dreams that come from Him. I can only get to the destination walking by faith, which means I can only see one step at a time.
The trouble is that I don't like doing the one-day-at-a-time gig.
The experience has felt long and dreary. Sometimes, I wonder if I'm even heading in the right direction.
An hour later, with a drained cappuccino and a bunch of wooden stir sticks I broke while talking, the verdict was this:
Keep going. Don't give up. Transitions takes time.
"Hmm..." I answer cautiously because I really want something to be wrong. I want to fix something. "So, you're saying I'm not missing anything?"
"Nothing's wrong" was the reply.
I stood up, awkwardly surprised. At the same time, I was relieved because I knew I could now go home and ask God what all this was about.
Sometimes the only known path to the future is a desire to stay faithful, even in the face of discouragement.
That is what I realized as I stopped to pray in my car before returning home.
As I desperately listened, I got a strong sense of what needed to be done.
Keep doing what I'm asking you to do, regardless of what it looks like, Bonnie.
There wasn't anything I could fix. No changes to be made. Well, one change was needed -- the one in my heart.
It doesn't come naturally, but I needed to trust God more.
After all, it's easier to think something is wrong when nothing is happening. Then we'd have something to fix.
It's also harder to keep doing the same thing, when we just want to see change.
Some people give you the impression that trusting God comes second nature. I'm not quite there yet.
That is why it is such a big deal that God is faithful, even when we are not.
Is it still worth it? I ask myself, as I drove into the garage with the same daily routine waiting for me.
Do I still want to trust God even when it's hard? I remember a time when I struggled to answer that question. So when I found my heart saying yes that day, I knew God was at work in me. And I was unexpectedly encouraged.
“No one who trusts God like this -- heart and soul -- will ever regret it.
It's the same for all of us, acting in the same incredibly generous way."
~ Romans 10:11-12,
Are you feeling discouraged because you're in between transitions?
God's dreams for you can never be stalled.
He's calling you to draw near Him, to give you strength, to keep doing what you're doing. He knows our hearts are weary. Yet He sees our desire to stay faithful. None of that changes His love for us. And He'll guide us all the way.
How is God asking you to trust Him more?
Pull up a chair. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Click to share a comment.
By Bonnie Gray, the FaithBarista serving up shots of faith for everyday life.
Bonnie Gray is an inspiring Christian writer and blogger, offering encouragement to keep faith fresh in the daily grind. Her writing springs from the belief that the beauty of faith often takes place when life goes off script. Bonnie is the Founder of FaithBarista.com and featured writer for Hallmark subsidiary DaySpring's (in)Courage. Bonnie is a native Californian living in the heart of Silicon Valley with her best friend Hubby, wrangling their two heaven-sent boys on the homestead.
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