Since my husband and I no longer have school-age children, I can’t keep up with the educational calendar in our area. When I recently saw the yellow buses roll down the road, I was taken aback. Now? How can summer be over already?
But the back-to-school sales (which seem to last all summer anyway) draw a flood of moms, dads, and kids to stock up on those needed supplies in every store I see. Along with the new book bags, lunchboxes, and clothes, another new thing waits for most students, and is sometimes scary—a new teacher.
Questions may swirl in their minds before they walk through the door of their classroom. Will my teacher be kind? Will he or she like me? Will she be too strict? Can I perform up to his expectations? If she really is mean, what do I do?
The unknown answers to these thoughts can plague kids and add more stress to the anxiety of the first few days of learning. They already face peer pressure, bullying, and in the last few years—the terror of guns at school.
Most educators do use their positions correctly, but we have seen instances of abuse to the point of legal battles and incarceration. There have also been accusations against teachers that were false and caused great harm to their reputations and careers.
Some parents take their kids side in everything and feel their offspring can do no wrong. But there needs to be a balance. We can understand the immaturity of youth as they can let emotions control them and come home to report unfair treatment.
This is where discernment is needed. Parents need to gather facts and judge between right and wrong. This can be difficult when we are not present at the school where events take place. The scale can slide from perceiving an incorrect grade to actual mistreatment.
How do you handle doubts about the way your child is treated by school staff? If your child comes home with questions about incidents in the classroom, what do you do?
Photo credit ©Getty Images/Johner Images
1. Pray for wisdom.
The first thing we should always do about any situation is pray. We can’t always know what is best when we haven’t witnessed classroom activity. We do want to believe and trust our children, but we also realize they think with a mind that hasn’t learned to judge everything clearly. The Holy Spirit can guide us into all truth, but we do need to be perceptive to His voice.
But when he the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. (John 16:13 NIV)
2. Inform the teacher of learning disabilities, health, or behavioral issues.
These may need to be addressed through alternative learning activities. Enlightenment can help determine the best teaching method for this child, and the instructor won’t be surprised at lack of cooperation during study time.
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you. (Psalm 32:8)
Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/Digital Vision.
3. Gather clear facts from your offspring.
Determine if situations described are merely a misunderstanding seen through the lens of a young person’s eyes. But if your son or daughter describes an incident that you know is beyond their scope of imagination, this should signal further investigation. Document what they tell you with as much detail as possible so you can be prepared to ask questions when meeting the teacher.
Stop judging by mere appearances, but instead judge correctly. (John 7:24)
4. Don’t jump to conclusions.
Get both sides of the story. Schedule an appointment to talk to the instructor in person. Digital conversations can be misconstrued and appear threatening if not worded carefully. If an in-person meeting has already taken place, emails may be a way for further information, but always preview before clicking send. Attend meetings, orientation, and events as much as possible. A disengaged parent will be viewed by educators as one that is only involved if they want to complain.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. (Proverbs 3:5)
Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/ljubaphoto
5. Remain calm and address the issue at hand.
Emotional outbursts will never solve any problem. No matter what has happened, or what we think has happened, we should cool down before bringing concerns to the table. Make sure the teacher doesn’t think she is under attack. It’s possible she doesn’t realize her actions may have given a wrong impression to the student.
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. (James 1:19)
6. Go to the administrators if unfair treatment is discovered.
Ask for the child to be removed from that class and transferred to another one. If this is not possible, talk to the teacher and let them know you disagree with the way they handled a situation, but that you are praying for them. Let them know in a non-threatening way that you are monitoring behavior that transpires in the classroom. If criminal abuse has taken place, go to the authorities.
Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/skynesher
7. Monitor the subjects that are taught early in the year.
At the beginning of the term, let the administration know that you disagree with programs such as sex education for young ones (or inappropriate sex education for any age), the acceptance of homosexual activity, or any subject that dishonors God. Request that your child be excused from these classes. If you express your desires before certain subjects are taught, it may be easier to get them to comply. As a parent, you have the right to determine what your child is exposed to. If the school refuses to honor your request, organizations such as the American Center for Law and Justice can help.
I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves. (Matthew 10:16)
8. Don’t spread gossip.
Sometimes it may become necessary for parents to partner together to resolve a school issue. But a problem between your child and the faculty should remain between the parties involved. Rumors can spread from bits and pieces of information and evolve into something that is entirely false. We don’t want to plant discord that can grow into other problems.
The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to the inmost parts. (Proverbs 18:8)
Education Is a Partnership
Parents and educators can work together to create a safe, effective school year for everyone involved when disagreements are handled in a peaceful and mature way.
We not only need to have open communication with the educational system, but we also can prepare kids for accepting a new teacher in the following ways:
- Before the school year starts, have a conversation with your child about the teacher’s status. Students need to respect the authority of the educational staff, but they also need to have the confidence to bring concerns to you as a parent. They shouldn’t feel they have to obey everything an adult tells them to do if the instructions make them feel unsafe or violate godly principles.
- Reassure your child you will address any issues that concern them. Don’t talk negatively about any educator in front of members of the family other than a spouse, as this may further youngster’s anxiety, or embed wrong beliefs about their school’s leaders.
- Find ways to encourage those in charge of classrooms, which can include Para Pros. A card or small gift on Teacher Appreciation Day can lift their spirits.
Thankfully, most teachers are kind, considerate, and put their students’ needs first. We have seen examples of instructors putting their own lives on the line to protect their classes when schools have been under attack from angry persons with an agenda. Some have died as they took bullets to keep their group safe.
Wrapping schools, students, and staff in prayer daily is the best defense to keep the enemy out. Teaching is not easy, and can be underappreciated, and mostly under paid. We can show encouragement to these self-sacrificing individuals by expressing consideration to them even when we have differing opinions.
Managing disagreements with biblical principles is the only way to be successful.
Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. (Hebrews 12:14)
Originally published Thursday, 21 August 2025.
