A day set aside for love does not change that you are fully loved all year long, just as you are. Read Psalm 139 if you ever start to doubt it.
Many of us find ourselves single on Valentine’s Day, the holiday of romance, wondering how we should spend our time. Let’s make one thing clear before we go any further– there is absolutely nothing wrong with being single on Valentine’s Day, just like there is nothing wrong with being single any other day of the year. There are plenty of reasons for people to be single, and all of us have gone through at least a season of singleness. There is also nothing wrong with choosing to not celebrate Valentine’s Day. It is a highly commercialized holiday, and some of us may want to avoid any kind of celebration. Others love the warm fuzzies that go along with Valentine’s Day and want to honor the day of love despite not having a romantic partner. If you find yourself alone on Valentine’s Day this year, but you still want to acknowledge the holiday, fear not! There are plenty of ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day if you choose to when you are not half of a couple!
1. “Galentine’s”
Galentine’s has increased in popularity over the past few years. This take on Valentine’s Day views the holiday as a time to celebrate more than just romantic relationships. Our friendships should be valued and cherished for their fun and importance in our lives. Many of us have friends who have been in our lives for years, through thick and thin. Celebrating these female friends is a wonderful way to spend Valentine’s Day. We are designed to be in community with each other, and that encompasses much more than just romantic relationships.
Whether you go to dinner or a spa on the 13th or the 14th, spending time with your friends is always a good option. Investing in your friendships brings great rewards–immediate and long-term. “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17). So grab your girls and show some love to each other this Valentine’s Day.
2. Serve
Serving others is a great way to show love. Shelters, soup kitchens, and food pantries are almost always in need of volunteers. If you don’t have plans on Valentine’s, perhaps you can show love to some of the most vulnerable. In advance, reach out to your favorite organization, or one you may not be familiar with but are interested in, to ensure that you have completed all necessary background checks and volunteer forms. Spend your Valentine’s Day showing God’s love to others, showing God that you love him by loving others. “Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me” (Matthew 25:40). Don’t be surprised when you get your cup filled as well by serving. Paul quotes Jesus in Acts 20:35 as saying “It is more blessed to give than to receive” and the wisdom of Proverbs 19:17 tells us that “Whoever is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and he will reward them for what they have done.”
3. Host a Singles-Only Party
If you know some other single people who don’t have plans for Valentine’s, gather them all together for a singles-only party! Invite your friends, co-workers, friends of friends, family members, and more. You can have a typical Valentine’s theme, a different theme, or no theme–whatever you choose. Have everyone bring over a dish and spend the evening with a group of people that may have otherwise been wondering what they should do for the holiday. A party is a great way to make people feel loved and included, so open your heart and your home and celebrate together!
4. Show Love to Coupled Friends
You likely know a couple who could use a little support in celebrating Valentine’s Day. Perhaps they have young children or a tight budget or a work schedule that limits their free time. You can bless others by recognizing the constraints on them and finding a way to help. If you are comfortable with it, an offer to babysit on the night of Valentine’s would be a huge blessing to a couple who may be craving time together. You could give them a gift card to a fancy restaurant they may not have gone to otherwise. You can take their kids out for hot chocolate while they have a candlelit dinner at home. You and the kids can even spend some time making Valentine’s cards for each other or their parents. Maybe you watch their pets or house-sit so they can stay at a hotel. Think about your friends who are part of a couple and what they specifically might appreciate, and then, don’t hesitate to reach out to them! “Carry each other’s burdens and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2).
5. Solo Date Night
Go to a movie and dinner- I suggest making a reservation for a night other than February 14th for your solo date night. Or make a recipe you have wanted to try and just haven’t gotten around to.
If you aren’t one for cooking, order your favorite delivery and watch movies that you love or haven’t had a chance to see. Pamper yourself! Maybe try an at-home spa day. Indulge in a long bath with all the goods—bath salts, sugar scrub, face mask, candles. Paint your nails a pretty color afterward. Eat some quality chocolate.
Self-love matters. Sometimes we shy away from caring for ourselves because it can seem indulgent or selfish. While there is definitely a line that can be crossed into self-obsession and putting ourselves above others, we do need to take care of our minds and bodies and show respect to ourselves as God’s creation. “Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Spend some time this Valentine’s Day honoring God by caring for and respecting your body.
Your Singleness Does Not Define You
Whatever you decide to do this Valentine’s Day, remember that your singleness is not limiting or defining you. It is a season you may or may not desire, but God is not surprised by it. A day set aside for love does not change that you are fully loved all year long, just as you are. Read Psalm 139 if you ever start to doubt it. “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well” (Psalm 139:14). Every situation you find yourself in can be a gift if you choose to use it that way by seeking God in it. Whether you have chosen to be single or not, we as Christians are not defined by our relationship status but by Christ.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
Photo Credit: ©Unsplash/Denise Johnson
Megan Moore is a military spouse and mom of 3 (through birth and adoption). A speech-language pathologist by training, she now spends her time moving around the country every couple of years. She is passionate about special needs, adoption, and ice cream.
