A God-Given Superpower
ANN WILSON
Lee en español
“Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.” Proverbs 16:24 (ESV)
Words … They are weighty and carry the power to build someone up or tear them down.
Sadly, while I’ve used my words for decades in my home mainly to instruct, remind and correct, I’ve also used them to criticize my loved ones, especially my husband. After all, wasn’t it my job to make my family and husband better? I thought I was motivating him to become better by pointing out the things he was doing wrong.
When I began listening closely to the words I was saying to myself, they were very similar: critique, shame, disappointment and condemnation.
But I wasn’t actually motivated by my inward degradation, and I couldn’t imagine my family was either. I wanted to be like a magnet drawing my family together, but I was unintentionally pushing them away. My words and thoughts needed to change!
Our most authentic selves are expressed through the words we say — or those we don’t say when we could.
When we work on our words, we work on our hearts. In much the same way that opening your wallet to give to someone in need causes you to become a more generous person, opening your mouth to speak life to those around you causes you to become a godlier person — and consequently a more positive and more contented person as well. This truth is expressed in our key Bible verse:
“Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body” (Proverbs 16:24).
Positive words do more than just reflect feelings; they affect the soul and health of the hearer. And they also do the same for the speaker.
When I realized my words were less like nurturing raindrops and more like shocking lightning strikes, I started finding opportunities to use this power for my husband and family’s benefit — and, yes, also for my own. I began watching and weighing my words, and just as Scripture says, more than my language changed. My heart changed as well.
I prayed, God, show me the greatness in my husband. Amen.
I had conditioned my brain to see only the negative for decades. But as I prayed that prayer daily, God answered it. I began seeing the good and eventually the great! Now I began to speak life.
My friend and I were accountable to one another to be “life speakers.” She started journaling all the good things her husband was doing, things she never noticed before. For his birthday, she gave him the journal. He sat and wept as her words of life swept over him. He didn’t see himself as being an excellent husband or dad, but her words of encouragement motivated him to be better!
Friend, that’s the power we carry as women who have the Holy Spirit within us!
God, please transform the way I think about and speak to the people I love! Help me to see the greatness You see in my spouse and family, and help me to say it to them. I need Your power! In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
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For a practical guide to help you communicate more effectively, grab a copy of Ann Wilson’s book, How to Speak Life to Your Husband: When All You Want to Do Is Yell at Him.
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Ann Wilson is the co-host of Family Life Today, a nationally syndicated radio/podcast show that reaches almost 1 million listeners each week. Follow Ann on social @daveannwilson.
Enter to WIN your very own copy of How to Speak Life to Your Husband by Ann Wilson. To celebrate this book, Ann’s publisher will give away 5 copies! Enter to win by filling out the form here. {We’ll randomly select 5 winners and notify them via email by Monday, May 19, 2025.}
FOR DEEPER STUDY
Ephesians 4:29, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (NIV).
Proverbs 18:21, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits” (ESV).
What are the words you generally think about yourself? If you're married, what are the words you generally think or speak about your husband?
If you’re feeling brave, ask your husband or kids whether your words tend to be more positive or negative. And in the comments, share one way you can speak life-giving words to your family or loved ones!
© 2025 by Ann Wilson. All rights reserved.
Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/Bulat Silvia
Proverbs 31 Ministries
P.O. Box 3189
Matthews, NC 28106
www.Proverbs31.org
Originally published Tuesday, 13 May 2025.
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