God’s Not Mad at Your Wrestling
LYNN COWELL
Lee en español
“Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, ‘My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.’” Matthew 26:39 (NIV)
In my eyes, she was wrong. My friend overreacted and attacked my character. So why, when I was the one hurt, was Father God asking me to apologize?
I felt like God and I were in a wrestling match. He was asking me to say “I’m sorry,” but I was struggling. Was He mad at me?
Later, when reading Esther 4, I saw Esther struggling to obey too. Mordecai commanded her “to approach the king, implore his favor, and plead with him personally for her people” (Esther 4:8, CSB). Esther first responded by emphasizing what everyone in the kingdom knew: If she approached the king without being invited, she could lose her life (Esther 4:11). In other words, No, I’m not going.
Imagine the wrestling in Esther’s heart. Wrestling with herself, with Mordecai, and with God. The Bible doesn’t tell us how much time passed — maybe minutes, maybe hours, maybe days — but Esther finally did surrender, choosing to obey.
Reading her story, I had my own aha moment: God isn’t mad when we wrestle to do His will. How do I know? Because His Son also wrestled.
Before He went to the cross, in the garden of Gethsemane, Jesus “fell with his face to the ground and prayed, ‘My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will’” (Matthew 26:39). Though Jesus wrestled, He chose to obey. Jesus surrendered to His Father. He always followed His Father’s way (John 5:19).
We may have had earthly parents who were impatient for a quick resolution and forced us to obey or say “I’m sorry” swiftly. Maybe they got mad when we didn’t act immediately. And we've all been impatient with our own kids and others too. But sometimes in our demands for quick obedience, we miss learning to wrestle — to do the right thing when it's difficult.
In the situation with my friend, it took me a bit to surrender to God’s prompting. But He was patient with me. And when I did obey, I felt a release because the wrestling was over.
You and I can spend time with the Father, learning His Word, hearing His loving voice encouraging and empowering us to trust Him, especially when obedience is difficult. He’s not mad when we wrestle but is here to help us stop trying to control the outcome and instead surrender to His good plan and purposes.
Our Father is on our side to help us, “for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose” (Philippians 2:13, NIV).
Father God, I want to obey You always, just like Jesus. Holy Spirit, empower me to listen and obey, surrendering to Your will and experiencing Your peace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
OUR FAVORITE THINGS
Wrestling to obey our heavenly Father may be part of being human, but there are tools we can incorporate to help us surrender. Empower a young woman in your life to trust her heavenly Father’s love and good plans in Lynn Cowell and Michelle Nietert’s newest book: Strong and Secure: 100 Devotions for Young Women. Help her grow strong in faith and secure in the love of the Father even in her wrestling. Order today!
ENGAGE
Scripture that we’ve memorized can help us when we are struggling to obey. Lynn has created the free resource “Verses That Stick: 7 Ways to Memorize Scripture in the Middle of Life’s Chaos.” Download your copy here!
FOR DEEPER STUDY
John 15:9, “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love” (NIV).
When you are wrestling to walk in love or surrender to the Father’s way, how can remembering that Jesus also wrestled help you move closer to the Father? Share with us in the comments!
© 2025 by Lynn Cowell. All rights reserved.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
P.O. Box 3189
Matthews, NC 28106
www.Proverbs31.org
Originally published Tuesday, 10 June 2025.
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