Heading up to my husband's church where he would be preaching that weekend, we were talking, laughing, and reminiscing about our past vacation. We were fully engrossed in conversation when suddenly, my husband felt the wheel shake, and a loud rumbling sound came from the left side of the car. "I think it's a flat tire," he said.
Sure enough, after a minute or so, the loud sound and increased shaking proved his point. As he sat there fixing the tire, a friendly stranger came to help. He had all the necessary tools to change the tire much more efficiently than he would have if he had done it alone. The man left quickly with simply a handshake and a smile.
In previous years, when I wasn't as emotionally mature, I would have focused on all the negative things that had happened to us that week. Our daughter's car was also giving us trouble, adding to our struggles. I would have complained about all the things that were happening to us. I would have chided that it was unfair for these things to happen to us when we were trying to live a righteous life. I might have blamed God for all our troubles.
But this time, things were different. Instead of immediately focusing on the negative aspects of our week, we chose to focus on the positive aspects. We immediately counted our blessings and thanked God that we were able to be at a spot on the highway where we could pull off with ease. We were also grateful for the gentleman who took the time to stop and help.
We were also thankful that we had a spare tire in the car and that my husband was able to change it while there was still daylight. All these things left us with a positive feeling, trusting God and knowing that He was with us the whole way.
We all have choices to make in life. Some people tend to think more on the negative side, focusing on all the bad things that can happen in life. Others are more positive, choosing to see life through rose-colored glasses, always seeing the glass half full rather than half empty. Throughout most of my life, I would have labeled myself a negative person, always focusing on what I lacked rather than what I had.
Because of the rough week with many car troubles, it would have been easy for me to fall into a negative mindset, whining and complaining about all the things that were unfair in our lives. Because I chose to look on the bright side, I was able to count my blessings, express gratitude, and adopt a more positive attitude toward life. Here's how I learned to seek the positive things in life:
Negative Thoughts Turn into Anger
What I noticed was that the primary emotion attached to my negative thoughts was anger. I carried a lot of anger at God over how unfair life was. This uncovered a secret spirit of entitlement, where I felt I was owed things in life simply because I was following the Lord and trying to live a righteous life.
But as the Bible tells us, no one is righteous on their own merits. Romans 3:23 says, "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Since none of us is perfect and we all need a Savior, none of us deserves any more than the next. Although we are undeserving of God's grace and mercy, He gives it to us freely. This is a gift that I need to choose to be thankful for each day of my life.
Not only do my negative thoughts increase the amount of anger I feel, but my positive thoughts turn into more joyous feelings. It is a better way to go through life feeling more joy than anger over things that have happened. In losses, I have failed to grieve, instead focusing on the positive blessings God has brought into my life.
Gratitude Changes My Attitude
When I choose to be grateful for all the positive things in life, my attitude becomes one of gratitude throughout the day. Not only can I see that troubling situation with joy, but I'm also able to see all situations with joy. The difference between anger and joy is my attitude. It's my choice and perspective. When I chose to shift my perspective from one of negativity to one of positivity, I noticed my attitude changed significantly.
The only person I am hurting when I carry around anger and negative thoughts is me. God does not want me to carry around a spirit of anger. He wants me to live a free life, enjoying it to the fullest, and be grateful to him for everything he has done.
Jesus himself, before going to the cross, chose to have his Last Supper with his disciples. During that time, he decided to lift the bread in a cup, giving thanks to his father for what he provided. Even though he knew what would soon befall him at the cross, he still chose to be grateful to his father. He didn't choose to get angry or focus on his loss of life.
Instead, he decided to be thankful to his father for the connection he had with him and the ability to be the atoning sacrifice for our sins. When I choose to be grateful for all the things that have happened to me in life, both good and bad, I set an example for others to follow in the footsteps of Christ.
It Increases My Prayer Life
After we counted our blessings as we drove off with the new spare tire on our car, I noticed that the first thing we did after counting our blessings was to praise God for His goodness. When I choose to focus on the positive aspects of life, I find that I pray more. I'm drawn to Christ. However, when I decide to focus on the negative, I find myself moving away from God because I'm angry at him for not providing the blessings I feel I deserve. Not only is it selfish, but it is also against Scripture. I am to count on all joy, even in trials and sufferings.
When I choose to focus on God and pray to Him, not only does it increase my intimate connection with Him, but it also helps me see all the ways He is with me throughout the day. These can be significant ways, such as the way he showed up for us by providing a kind gentleman and the tools to change the tire, but also in the small ways, like being grateful that our daughter was not driving the car, even though she had been just a day earlier.
When we get to heaven, we'll be amazed at how many ways God protected us, provided for us, and was present with us in ways we never saw or even expected. By learning to count my blessings now and praying to God, it opens my eyes to see how present he is with me throughout the day.
Focusing on the positive aspects of life, like anything else, is a skill. Simply because I'm used to looking at the negative side does not mean I can't change my attitude and my perspective. By choosing to focus on the positive, I not only changed my emotional health but also my mental health. In the end, I am less angry and more joyful, able to focus on happy thoughts rather than negative, angry ones.
Choose to focus on God and all His blessings, and you will soon find the positive things in life. Count your blessings each day, write them down in a journal, and reflect each month on all the ways God was with you in big and small ways.
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