10 Things Never to Say to Your Adult Children

10 Things Never to Say to Your Adult Children

Emotions may be triggered by that one word for many.

May I pose a question?
Do you realize they are our legacy?

The babe that babbles
The two year old that toddles and tumbles
The teen that tests limits – and tempts fate
The young adult – the millennial – that begins “adulting”
The older adult that is now parenting

What connects these statements? Children. They are our children.

It’s our responsibility to mold and shape the next generation, one child at a time. Like every generation before them, the generation behind us needs to know one thing – they matter. Specifically that they matter to you, their parent. And our words matter – possibly more than we realize.

There are things we need to say – and not say – to build confidence, esteem and self-respect at each stage of their lives. If we don’t support our children, who will? And where will they turn? And what will they turn to for solace when they cannot find it from us?

So many things can tear a person down, not all can be addressed in a single article. Let’s look at a few that have a powerful but negative impact on our kids. Like poison kills a person, poisonous words kill the spirit and soul of a person.

Regardless of your age, what would you not want to hear your parents say to you? With that in mind, here are 10 things not to say to your adult children:

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1. I wish I’d never had you.

Death. My spirit is challenged just writing that sentence, yet so many people have heard that judgment rendered against them by one or both parents.

God has something better to say about your child. Oh by the way, if your parents broke your spirit with spiteful words, every time you read the words your child, please replace it in your head with the word you.

You guided my conception and formed me in the womb Job 10:10

God created your child. He guided one particular egg and one particular sperm to connect to create one unique person. And God continues with His truth.

“I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations.”  Jeremiah 1:5

Never before and never since has that unique person, your child, walked this earth to do what God formed them to do. God set your child apart for some special assignment that only they can do. Thank You, O Mighty God!

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