Have you ever seen compared yourself to a friend or stranger and said, “I wish I had her life?” We’ve all been there. But the thing about comparison is it only makes those feelings of inadequacy and envy stronger. Happy women, on the other hand, don’t focus on what other people have. These women are focused on their own lives. They are thankful and have often worked hard to see the blessings in their lives, not the things they lack.
Gratitude and happiness are not natural for most of us. We’re all prone to compare, to feel jealous, to get down about the struggles we have going on in our lives. The good news is, there are some real practical things we can all do to be happier and more joyful. Here are 10 specific ways you can work toward being happy with your life today.
1. Analyze your spiritual health
Jesus promised the woman at the well that she could have a drink from the well of salvation, and she would never be thirsty again. The source of true happiness comes from Jesus. To receive that water, we have to be constantly connected to God. If you are disconnected from God, you’ll never be truly happy. When is the last time you stayed connected to God through reading the word, prayer or practicing other spiritual disciplines like fasting, silence or solitude? Make your spiritual life a priority so you can drink from the Well that never runs dry.
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2. Have an attitude of gratitude
Philippians 4:12 says, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Even after all Paul had been through, he knew that contentment was the key to joy, and he wanted his church to know it too. Instead of focusing on what you don’t have, focus on what you do have. To help change your mindset, begin a gratitude journal and for the next thirty days, write down all your blessings, even if they seem insignificant. You will be amazed at how much more aware you become of how much God is at work in your life when you begin to see life as a blessing rather than a trial.
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3. Stop keeping up with the Jones’
It’s difficult to be happy when you are constantly running around chasing temporal, worldly possessions. At the end of life, it will not be the things you acquired that you will measure as a successful life, but rather how well you loved the people in your life. You don’t need to participate in the latest fad to be someone; God believes you are worthy just for who you are.
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4. Get adequate rest
Physical health is linked to your emotional health. God can’t use you if you are too tired and weak to accomplish his purposes. Do what you can to be a good steward of your body. Exercise regularly. Eat a balanced diet. Get adequate sleep. It can make a difference in the way you view everything.
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5. Free yourself from the trap of comparison
The moment you compare yourself to someone else in an area and fall short, the enemy seeks to worm his way in, creating division where there should be unity and superiority where there should be humility. Seek to view others as better than yourself and you’ll break free from being worried about others’ perceptions of you.
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6. Focus on others
Every time you feel discouraged about your circumstances vow to do something for others. Volunteer at a food pantry. Write a check for a charity. Serve in your church’s ministry. When you turn your focus outward rather than inward, it changes your perspective on how much better your life is than you originally thought.
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7. Exhibit the fruit of the Spirit
The Bible talks a lot about the concept of reaping and sowing. What we sow into the world is what we receive in Christ like development. The way Christians identify other Christians is by the fruits of the spirit they display. The more kindness, gentleness and patience you display the more peace and grace God develops within you.
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8. Forgive often
Bitterness and resentment are two main enemies of happiness. Happiness can’t bloom where weeds of bitterness have taken root. If there are people you need to forgive, do so. God makes it clear that if you don’t forgive others, God won’t forgive you.
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9. Change your perspective
Understand that happiness is just a fleeting feeling, but joy is a state of your soul. Don’t chase after what the world says makes you happy, chase after what God says will bring you joy. Do a Scripture study on the word joy and see what you discover. Are there steps you can take to shift your focus from a temporal feeling of happiness to experiencing joy on a regular basis?
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10. Love well
1 Corinthians 13 sets a high bar on what love is: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” Do you love the people in your life like 1 Corinthians explains? Write a card to encourage someone. Tame your tongue when you would normally get angry. Demonstrate to others the love Scripture says we should have for one another.
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Michelle S. Lazurek is an award-winning author, speaker, pastor's wife and mother. Winner of the Golden Scroll Children's Book of the Year and the Enduring Light Silver Medal, she is a member of the Christian Author's Network and the Advanced Writers and Speakers Association. Her first book with Leafwood Publishers, An Invitation to the Table, came out September 2016. She also teaches at various writers' workshops, such as the Montrose Christian Writers conference. She and her husband live in Coudersport, Pennsylvania, with their two children, Caleb and Leah. For more information, please visit her website at michellelazurek.com.
Originally published Wednesday, 06 December 2017.
