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blessednw -> RE: Divorce - One Stop Thread (5/18/2008 1:51:00 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: lastblast
quote:
ORIGINAL: TATERBUGLETTE
Bottom line, not everyone is going to agree on this. Those who are the most against ANY divorce are the ones who do the least to help those who must get divorced...the abused, neglected, abandoned women and kids who suffer in misery and poverty and loveless, often violently abusive marriages. And emotional abuse can be quite severe. Lest we forget, many MEN are victims of an abusive spouse and are raising children. It goes both ways these days, sadly. God is love and there for those who want to love the divorced......and those in His church following His heart will show it to them. Blessings!
Tater,
You are very ignorant in what you speak of. I am a member of a Christian group FILLED with divorced persons, so you know not what you speak of----at all. You are uplifting and ADVOCATING the "goodness" and rightness of divorce, so yes, we are on opposing sides of this issue---because I see nothing "good" or right in the permanent forsaking of the union God joined together.
I defend the permanency of marriage because that is what I see throughout scripture. I also stand with my divorced brothers and sisters in unity against the plague of divorce and the brokenness which occurs in families when those who suffer give up. God has called each who profess to know HIM, to love as HE LOVES (not only the "good"/"wronged" person in a marriage), not to abandon permanently the "unloveable"...........Thank goodness He did not do that to us when WE were entrenched in sin and very unloveable.
Do we all want JUSTICE? Absolutely. It is something innate in most of us. Many of us "fight" for the underdog and do what we can to help them in their hurt. However, while we live and breathe on this earth, it is the LORD'S desire that we pray for those who treat us badly and hope that they too come to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ and that they turn from their sins and be healed. I am not feeling that from you towards offenders, but only bitterness and anger. That is not of God..............this I know.
Tater,
I agree here. You just do not what you are saying. I know many who know that divorce is a wrong solution to a difficult problem for a believer. They are what I might say above the bar in helping those dealing with sinning spouses to follow the Lord and have their needs met. You really do not know about these, it appears
I think you certainly may have met some who are harsh towards others and railed against women while being unwilling to see the log in their own eye. Maybe that is what you are speaking of. But when it comes to those modern day believers who have had their eyes opened about the crisis of divorce mentality ripping apart the unity of believing families, or those seeking to walk with the Lord with an unbelieving spouse (not easy), I think they are most active in supporting those who suffer. They pray for them, exhort them with truth from God's word (as we are called to do) support them financially at times, offer them bed and board, make themselves available day and night and in general believe they should maintain integrity in their actions and beliefs. But perhaps you have not met nor spent time with such as these. I have, and I am blessed because of it.
You hit it on the head, lastblast, it is ignorance. Before the different trials I have found myself in commenced, I had never met a christian who really believed that God meant the strong things He said about keeping vows. In fact, the general christian thinking was that obedience was something God didn't really care much about. How wrong I have found out that thinking was. Obedience to God, and all He commands, is critical to our formation as His people.
There are people who DO misuse the word of God to misuse another person, and they will be held accountable to a Holy God for this. God will not overlook this.
At the same time, God does not promote divorce-as-a-solution, because it goes against His message of reconciliation to man and from person to person, especially the kind of vow and bond that is meant to be a lifetime covenant. He does allow trouble, but He does not teach divorce as a way to fix the problem. He doesn't teach us to take a position that can only be interpreted as a further tearing of our commitments and families.
Divorce does not "fix" abuse either. In fact God said divorce came from the hardened hearts of people. It is a naive assumption to use divorce-as-a-solution. If anything, it promotes a falseness to the one abusing that they are free to keep abusing others and have no longer any obligations to their original family and partner.
That man/woman trapped in controlling and violent behavior needs major prayer. They are usually trying to run from God anyway, so they should be viewed as a prodigal to Him. He loves the prodigal(sometimes hard for us to imagine, but then, that would show up our own pride) and is relentless in His motive to humble them, break them and return them to fellowship with HIm (most important) and restore things lost, such as family, legacy, calling and destiny.
Women and men 'writing off' those who have resorted to sinful behavior such as control and cruelty are missing the Gospel. Those ones who are obviously deceived as to the realities of life need major prayer.
Divorce promotion/defense as such can bring quite a bit of consequences spiritually to an individual and a family. There are times when it truly is unavoidable, but seeking it is aligning with a destructive way of thinking that has truly devastated individuals, families and ultimately our culture's underpinnings.
I spoke with a European in a country where divorce is rare. He said, "you know what they say about America? Married one minute, divorced five minutes later" We really have led the way in this world (america). Now may the church begin to seek answers to these marriages in strife and sin that is more compatible with a Gospel-aligned attitude/changed heart.
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