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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 9/27/2005 11:51:21 AM
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cherish405
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From: The Land Down Under
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Trish ducks and disappears.
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*** Gone crazy. Back soon. ***
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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 9/29/2005 11:43:31 AM
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Blessed63
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nora chases Trish with a broom
Thank You! Waiting/Learning is hard but....a good growth experince!
Nora
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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 10/10/2005 11:36:30 PM
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Blessed63
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Hello All,
I finally have web access at home and I am SOOOOOOOO Happy! I am going to try and check in from time to time but I won't be here bunches. There have been many changes in my life of late and they require me to spend lots of time in the non-cyber world. I need to let ya'll know a few things and confession time has arrived......
I am getting married on Saturday to my best friend and I am very happy and very much in love....YES I KNOW many of you will wonder many things but all I will say is he was not the cause of my divorce, he was a friend and fellow Christian who has stood by and watched me go crazy last year and watched me fail in many area's as a Christian and that included relationships that were totally out of the bounds of GOD's will and ......as Paul Harvey says you now know the rest of the story about my suicide attempt in NOV of 04. I woke up that awful morning and realized that I had left GOD somewhere on the road I was on....that road was a fast paced road to hell. I was drinking, in a relationship with a man who was not a Christian and resembled, according to my family, the antichrist. I was on prescription drugs that I took to end my pain and used to try and end my life. I woke to find that GOD was not through with me yet and that HE had/has a plan for my life and it did not include me dying physically or spiritually or mentally. Rebellion time was over the minute HE allowed me to see what I was like without HIM! Since then I have been on a road of great spiritual growth and have regained my measure of faith that was mine all along but I chose not to exercise. I wish I could tell you how wonderful it feels to finally understand that the "Joy of the LORD" has nothing to do with what is outside of us or who we have or don't have in our life. We only require one thing and that thing is JESUS! Nothing more or less! The verse that comes to mind is "Seek ye first the Kingdom of GOD".....the rest HE will add our only job is to seek HIM and HIS kingdom purpose for our life...PERIOD!!!!! I chose that morning HE allowed me to see REALLY see me for the first time and everything has been added to me that I require to fulfill HIS will for my life. I have a story, a story of abuse, drugs, alcohol and men.......I have a story about how I was redeemed and bought back from the enemy by the BLOOD! I will tell that story to whoever will listen......Its what I was made to do, to proclaim HIS unconditional love and grace......The time has come and I will be about doing just that til HE calls me home.
I want to thank all of you who have prayed for me and been there for me and listened to me and stood in the gap for me! I will check in from time to time but I won't be regular as my new job will take lots of my time....please pray for me as you feel lead I will pray for ya'll also!
With JOY and LOVE
Nora
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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 10/10/2005 11:43:32 PM
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Blessed63
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P.S.
On Saturday I also gain 4 more kids and SEVEN beautiful grandbabies! YEAH! They are so much fun!
Nora
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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 10/11/2005 12:46:59 PM
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magdaleine
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Nora, your excitement is hard to hide and contain, isn't it? It's evident that you are very happy. {{{{{Nora}}}}}
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Maggie
Ask me about my book. It's now available online!
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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 10/12/2005 11:33:34 PM
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Blessed63
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I realized after I posted the other day that I might have left a few of you reeling who read this thread…..I will try to clarify as best I can (unlike Maggie I am not gifted with the written word)
There has been great changes in me and my life in the last 11 mths most that I have not shared with ya'll til now, as I haven't felt lead to til now! As many of you know my x-husband choose alcohol over his family last year and to tell the truth I was devastated by those choices. When I should have choose to turn to GOD I choose the old ways of numbing my pain and that included alcohol, relationships out of GOD's will and prescription drugs. I turned away from GOD and my friends here and I was in full rebellion. In November 04 I tried to kill myself and when I woke in the hospital I felt like a total failure to still be breathing. The enemy is such a good liar and man I fell for all the lies!!!!!! A few days after I got out of the hospital I walked by my bathroom mirror and saw me for the first time…..totally undone, alone and without GOD. That was the moment of breaking for me. There was no going back to the old ways or old life. HE has removed many things from my life and set my feet back on the path HIS path. I am still very far away from where I should be but I am further down the road than I was yesterday or 11 mths ago. I truly believe that there are many more "me's" sitting in the church pews than we want to admit and I truly believe that someday HE will use me to help those other "me's". HE blessed me with the love and spiritual covering I require to accomplish this task, as this man watched me go thru all this last year and still choose to love me anyway. I will not allow this to be a debate about remarriage, so for those who would go there I will say this and it will be the last word from me about the issue. I had biblical reasons for my divorce as well as many others; my intended is a widower….done with that subject. I am so happy and blessed with what GOD has and is doing in my life, and I pray that HE will give you the same peace HE has given me.
Thanks to all who pray for me and all the love ya'll have given me!
Nora
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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 10/13/2005 6:32:16 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32451
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(((((((((((((((((((NORA)))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I'm so glad to see you happy. Sounds like the Lord has really been doing some things with you. Like you said, I doubt He's finished with you yet. Just like the rest of us.
Be happy, Nora. God bless.
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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 10/29/2005 3:06:33 AM
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humbleinspirit
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Congratulations Nora!
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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 10/29/2005 7:00:15 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32451
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Congratulations Nora. Many blessings to you and your dh.
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RE: Nora's Rest (a.k.a. search for peace) - 10/31/2005 9:29:13 PM
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magdaleine
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Proofing skills? Just post what you write. I'm sure it will be fine. 
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/2/2005 2:48:57 PM
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Blessed63
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This was an answer to a pm that maggie and I shared a few weeks ago…..
quote:
A friend once told me a story about a famous matador. He was renowned for his way with bulls and today was no exception in the dance he performed with the bull in the arena. Finally he had struck the fatal blow and with the bull down on the ground he turned to face the adulation of a crowd gone wild. While he stood, soaking in the people's praise, with one last breath, the bull behind him rose and gored him in the back. He cried out, "I've been killed by a dead bull!" and collapsed on the ground.
By your account, you've killed some bulls. I beg you, don't turn your back on those dead bulls! They WILL rise to gore you when you least expect it.
Bulls and Matadors…..
When I first heard this little story I immediately grasped the concept that our Christian walk is a lot like this sometimes. We turn to accept the praise for what "we" have accomplished and that ole bull (the enemy) gorges us right in the back! The problem of course is that we are not the one who should be accepting the praise for where we are at or where we have come from. We need to take the "we/me" out of the picture. The word says we can do all things thru Christ, not all things thru me (although too many of us live this way). The second we turn our focus from HIM is the second that bull (the enemy) gets us in the back. So why do we/me want all the praise, and as believers we do it over and over and over!
That matador was trained for years and years to become a bullfighter and he was trained in the area of how to receive his praise! It is an art, I watched it once, the grace and elegance of the matador is awesome, the killing grossed me out, but the matador moved so beautifully and his every move was thought out and planned! He also knew the danger and knew the risk. How sad that one wrong move exposed him to death and stole his life. We as believers should also be trained to know the risk, yet many of us are not. This can be the case for many reasons, lack of understanding, pride, our past or how we were brought up (trained). For me it was my training…….
My own life has been a series of turning my back on the bull and getting gored EVERYTIME! Til recently I never grasped the concept that my eyes must stay on HIM always and HE is the only one who the praise belongs to! I spent the first nine years of my Christian life getting gored in the back by the enemy (and I am sure it will happen again cause I am human and far from perfect, just not as often now) on a regular basis and with awful consequences The enemy knows our weakness and he will present them as often as he can, because his sole goal is to destroy us and the testimony GOD has for us and the awesome life HIS GRACE gives us. Our job as a believer is to give testimony to what GOD has done for us and help others see HIM in all HIS glory! But for me, first I had to overcome the training I received before Christ came to my life and heart! For some this is easy, but for others like me there was/is much to undue!
continued........
< Message edited by Blessed63 -- 11/2/2005 9:47:52 PM >
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"Then will I purify the lips of the peoples, that all of them may call on the name of the LORD and serve him shoulder to shoulder. Zeph 3:9
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/2/2005 2:53:50 PM
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Blessed63
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As a child I was sexually abused and when I became an adult I choose people and circumstances that would continue that abuse, sexually, verbally and physically. I understood on some level that I was being abused but the problem was I was trained to accept the abuse as normal and I did what I was trained to do. I had my first child at 15; because I was trained to be sexual without understanding the consequences or responsibility that goes with having sex, nor did I have the proper Biblical understanding of sex. I continued to follow my training, I had my second child at 17 (who I gave up for adoption), and the pattern was set! My training said my worth was based upon what I could give to a man (my body) and without a man on my arm I was failing! Each person will walk their own path but, they will repeat the training pattern somewhere if they are not retrained.
My life has been filled with men, drugs, alcohol, divorces! I did go into professional counseling at 28 and was told I was in charge (training #2, helpful but wrong) so I went about following my new training, failed, went back to the old ways, tried again failed went back to the old ways, etc for the next 14 years…..The LORD had been chasing me around for a long time but I was to busy being in charge to hear….I was saved at 33 but I tried to sit the fence, cause to submit totally to GOD meant I would not have control and after I heard I was in charge submission was not the ticket for me, so I compromised, "LORD I will give up some things to YOU, but I will keep "this and that" cause I am in charge of "this and that" and I know better!" So when I had victory in those "this and that" areas it was my praise and being the good matador that I was I turned to accept my praise and BAHM, gored and gored I was! I was so confused, disheartened and almost destroyed by all this. I would cry out to GOD, why! I still had the "this and that" theory of life operating in me so of course I never heard the answer, because I was still in charge of "this and that"! When this cycle almost took my life last year I finally heard the answer. I would like to say this was my first attempt at ending my life but the truth is it was my fourth attempt, and the first time I was still long enough before GOD to hear the answer HE had been trying to give me for years (the patience of GOD is so awesome). I was mad OH HOW MAD I WAS to still be breathing when I left the hospital, because I was still in charge and I failed again! How did they let me go after only one day…..I am an expert at appearing normal and I don't meet the criteria to be legally committed, although my mom and oldest ds attempted to do just that! (LOL they do love me REALLY). But GOD had other plans for me and it happened about the second day home…
Somehow I got everyone to go home (goes to show you how good I am at looking normal) and I was alone. I walked by my bathroom mirror as I had done many times before, but this time I saw the most horrible thing…..ME! Undone, alone, without GOD and totally a waste! I was no good to myself or anyone else in the shape I was in. Not only that, I felt the shame of being a failure in my walk with HIM (the accuser of the brethren was at my house)! Whispers in my head said, "You are nothing you came from nothing you will always be nothing. Even GOD doesn't want you anymore, why would HE, you are such an embarrassment to HIM! No one is here; find a way to end this pain (my only reason for ever trying to kill myself, I just wanted to stop hurting)!!!!"
continued...
< Message edited by Blessed63 -- 11/2/2005 9:49:21 PM >
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"Then will I purify the lips of the peoples, that all of them may call on the name of the LORD and serve him shoulder to shoulder. Zeph 3:9
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/2/2005 2:56:41 PM
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Blessed63
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AHHHH…..but then my heart spoke up, "Yes child you have failed yet again, yes child what a mess you have made, yes child you are undone, yes child you are in pain, but you are still MY CHILD and I love you and I will hold you and I will be there for you when you LET ME (duh, let HIM what a novel thought I thought!)!" I finally got it! To keep the bull from goring me I had to lean on HIM and I had to give it ALL to HIM, much easier said than done for people like me, the retraining is a tough job!
I heard a preacher talk about the armor of GOD... (Eph 6:11-18), (ya'll are thinking right now where is this girl going, but bear with me). Ever notice that there is no mention of a back to this armor??? Why is that; BECAUSE HE HAS OUR BACK, hmmmm…..if HE has got our back then even when that bull rises up we don't need to worry! Will we feel the horn (the fiery darts of the enemy) of the bull on occasion? Well yeah, but when we have the proper matador cape (the shield of faith and all the rest that goes with it) then what do we have to fear, because we have all HE gave to us to fight that bull and HE has got our back. See the enemy uses deception and the deception for me was fear…..fear of failure, fear of not being wanted or loved unless I did "this" or was "that', in some cases just plain ole fear of living! FEAR FEAR FEAR…..YUCK YUCK YUCK! Thank You LORD for delivering me from that!
Now just when I was understanding all this, the matador story was shared with me (and hit me right between the eyes I might add), I had what I thought was a bull rising up……BUT with my cape(shield of faith) and all the tools HE gave me; I said, "LORD didn't I give this to you? What is the deal with this person reaching out to me now?" That person was someone I became involved with last year that helped me to almost destroy my life…..I hand picked someone who would abuse me and use me and then leave me adrift (Old training #1). Well now he is adrift, he is suicidal and he is struggling with addiction. My first thought was SUFFER SUCKER I am in charge now (old training #2)! My second thought was why (fear)??? The answer, GOD said listen and so I did! (geesh the things HE ask sometimes!) Then GOD had a few things to say, oh they came from my mouth but the words were not from me, bull said, "I just needed to hear a friendly voice and you came to mind." I wanted to say well I ain't as friendly as you think, GOD said, " I understand that you are having a tuff time just now, I've been there too!", Bull said, "I am sorry I was the cause of so much of your pain / tuff times." I wanted to say yeah feel lucky you are still breathing, GOD said, "That is the past and I don't blame you, I know you didn't understand the effect our relationship would have on me (really GOD how can you ask me to say these things I was thinking!)." Anyway, we talked on about my growth and my peace and my new relationship with my new (almost then) hubby and how blessed my life is. We talked about the bull's struggles and his almost relationships and how he just never seemed to be able to get it right in general and the whole time he is saying why are you listening, why do you care, why did I use you the way I did. Well GOD had a few more things to say (I wanted to hang up the phone awhile back LOL, but you know that submission to the Spirit thang (GOD) would not let me), "Listen bull, I know you don't want to hear about the G O D thing, BUT here is the deal, the person I am now and the peace I have is due to me finally turning it all over to G O D and I am alive today because of G O D (new training)! G O D saved me and as you know I sure wasn't doing any good on my own!"
The bull is now in treatment, he admitted he turned his back on GOD years ago (he was a pastor in training at one time) and he was tired of living his life the way it was, yet he knew suicide was not the answer! PRAISE GOD! PRAISE GOD! (notice not praise nora for being such a good person). I have talked with his son once since he went into treatment and so far everything is going good! I may never hear from him again, and then again I may. I don't know the plans GOD has but I do know this, that bull is not a bull, just a man who needed to hear the word and for whatever reason he choose this matador (and a matador who was carrying a grudge at that) to carry life instead of death!
I want you to know the most awesome part of this whole deal was that when GOD is in something he will give you the cover and backing to handle it…..I was contacted by email first cause the bull knew I was a mad matador the last time we talked, I called my beautiful ( almost then) hubby and told him about it, we prayed and he felt lead also that I should at least listen to what the bull had to say. My mind was yelling NO! Hubby said, "listen with your heart girl what does it say?" That ole thumping gizzard (heart for you none southern folks) was saying just listen, the shocking part was that my heart and his (wonderful hubby) heart were hearing the same thing, why do we continue to be shocked by how GOD does things? The word does say HIS ways are not our ways! Anyway……..That is Nora's bull theory of life! I could think of about forty other areas' this could apply to, but I will spare you that today!
Watch out for the bulls ya'll, but don't be afraid, CAUSE GOD'S GOT YOU BACK!
I love ya'll all, have a BLESSED day!
Nora
< Message edited by Blessed63 -- 11/2/2005 9:52:34 PM >
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"Then will I purify the lips of the peoples, that all of them may call on the name of the LORD and serve him shoulder to shoulder. Zeph 3:9
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/2/2005 4:04:40 PM
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magdaleine
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Wow, Nora! I'm glad that story impacted you so strongly! And I hope you never turn your back on a bull again! Thank you so much for sharing.
Hugs!
Maggie
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/2/2005 4:14:33 PM
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Blessed63
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Bulls alive or dead don't scare me anymore Maggie, but turning around without my armor scares me to death!
Nora
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"Then will I purify the lips of the peoples, that all of them may call on the name of the LORD and serve him shoulder to shoulder. Zeph 3:9
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/2/2005 10:02:22 PM
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Blessed63
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From: TN
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quote:
"Come now, let us argue this out," says the LORD. "No matter how deep the stain of your sins, I can remove it. I can make you as clean as freshly fallen snow. Even if you are stained as red as crimson, I can make you as white as wool. " (the refernece was cut short but I think it ws trying to read this is somewhere in Isaiah)
Don't wait to present your ugliest, dirtiest stains before God. He promises to make you clean.
I came home from church tonight and found this in my email in one of my daily devtionals, thought I would pass it along!
Night all!
Nora
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"Then will I purify the lips of the peoples, that all of them may call on the name of the LORD and serve him shoulder to shoulder. Zeph 3:9
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/5/2005 8:16:23 PM
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Blessed63
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WOW DeeDee! Still got it girl! My life was silence and death til HE came!!!!
YES please use the bull theroy as often as you wish my dear!
My new hubby, whose name is Bobby BTW (with his permission of course)and I went fishing this morning and we didn't catch a thing......no wait we caught a fresh moment with HIM, on the way to the creek we were listening to Klove and Amazing Love started playing.....I just was blown away (even though I have heard the song a hundred times) and then hubby caught it and it was just awesome, when we stopped to get bait and soda I am sure that they thought we had been fighting or something cause both of us were red eyed LOL! Isn't funny how HE can use something or someone who we are familar with to touch us! Anyway no fish but lots of quality time with hubby and the LORD enjoying the day! It was in the 70's here in TN and it is NOV!!!!
Have a AWESOME Weekend!
Nora
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"Then will I purify the lips of the peoples, that all of them may call on the name of the LORD and serve him shoulder to shoulder. Zeph 3:9
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/5/2005 8:20:51 PM
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humbleinspirit
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Hi Nora, It is good to see you!
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/5/2005 10:53:27 PM
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Deeds
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What a great day you had NOra! I have been working on my paper all day! (sigh) I am determined to finish tonight. I am so close!
Have a great rest of your weekend. Thanks for visiting my thread!
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/7/2005 7:37:14 AM
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Blessed63
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Hi Mike! Hi DeeDee!
Thought I would share, I get this devotional daily and sometimes it just hits me right between the eyes!!!
"Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a right spirit within me. Psalm 51:10
Spiritual renewal comes from God alone; we cannot manufacture it ourselves. We must depend on him to change our hearts and lives. Ask God to give you the refreshment and new life your spirit needs." (Living Waters)
Have a great day, I will have 2 of the grandkid today (1 & 3) SO I will be BUSY!!!!!
Nora
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"Then will I purify the lips of the peoples, that all of them may call on the name of the LORD and serve him shoulder to shoulder. Zeph 3:9
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RE: Bulls and Matadors - 11/7/2005 8:00:26 AM
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Deeds
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Hay what just happened?!? I must be loosing it or something! I typed something in this box and I stopped and looke for a verse in my Bible and just as I went to type it everything I just typed was gone. How did that happen. NOw I have to remember what I just typed......
I think I said it like this. It is a wonder why we are still amazed that God still wants to communicate with us and work in our lives, and all we have to do is to ask for and receive the cleansing power he has. He did it for us before and he'll do it again.
And the gessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter: so he made again another vessel, as seemed good to the potter to make it.
Jeremiah 18:4
I came across this verse today and I don't think I have ever read it before.
Now what is that song that verse must have inspired?
Have thine own way Lord, Have thine own way,
thou art the potter I am the clay
mold me and make me after thy will,
while I am waiting yielded and still
It is a wonderful thing that no matter what we do to our lives even though the Lord still has us in his hand. If we would just sit still for a minute he'd be able to create us into a new vessel.
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OOPS! I backed up real quick and my moto is NEVERTHELESS.....YOUR will not mine! So I go to work with the thought ever in my mind when YOU say move I will move, when YOU say jump I will jump! Waiting is hard....which one of YOU prayed for me to have patience! Confess now! LOL!!! 
DD fried it somehow 
LOL! It was older than dirt! 
I feel so inspired after reading what you have posted here. I can relate to what you typed about the Bull 
and all of the stuff you have endured over the past year/years!! I came here just to throw one of those verses out there for ya, but I wanted to read what you posted first. I already had the verse picked out and as I read what you had to post I think it fits well here. 
And it is now more for me than you, I think. Do you mind if I use some of your "Bull theroy of life" in speaking to others? That is more than awsome!! Have a wonderful blessed week!!!!!