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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse?

 
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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 8/25/2008 9:09:46 PM   
monamie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: bzirk

quote:

ORIGINAL: 42servehymn

My husband and I have slept in a full size (double) bed for 25 years. We are cuddlers unless it is too hot but even then we are touching somehow.


I thought we were the only ones. We had a king at one point, but it took up too much room, and we wanted a small sofa in the bedroom, so we went back to a full. People think we're nuts, but we've made it 25 years and got four kids, so it must be okay. LOL!

To answer the OP, when I was first married I had a really hard time sleeping all night in the same bed as my husband and he had a problem as well. What the problem was is that we had NEVER had to share a bed with anyone. One thing that really helped us is that we each got a body pillow, and this kept us from rolling into each other. We also learned to relax. Just a thought.



Nope. There are others of us out here too! Over 28 years and we're in a full size bed with no plans of getting a queen or king. When we travel and sleep in a larger bed, it feels weird. Neither of us like it.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 8/25/2008 9:15:40 PM   
bzirk


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My parents never owned a king until I was almost 30 years old, and they only had that a few years and went back to a full. They had a full size bed until my dad passed away and my mom still sleeps in it today. She would be lost in a king.

Back to topic.

I think so much of sleeping in a bed with someone is learning to oblige each other and learning to relax. Sometimes that can take a while. I think I was married almost four years before I really started to relax. But hey, I got pregnant with my first child within a year.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 8/26/2008 8:28:51 AM   
car2ner


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We like to snuggle so much that it is hard to get OUT of the bed since it means snuggling needs to wait.

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Post #: 53
RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 8/27/2008 12:44:26 AM   
4IMPersuaded

 

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DH is a big guy that likes to snuggle. I like snuggling until it is time to sleep and then I need my space! I was beside myself on my honeymoon when I realized that I couldn't sleep spooned! I thought I was some sort of failure as a wife. To make matters worse, I work all shifts, so sometimes I'm home at night, sometimes I sleep during the day.

My sleep life changed recently when we got a king and hubby got a C-PAP. It is a beautiful thing, although he did wake me up twice recently in the middle of the night by whacking me in the face... He was fighting bad guys... okey, dokey.

Anyway... it is tough going to a hotel or to our far-away family's because they have queens or fulls. We manage and I'd rather have him there, but the sleep is sacrificed.

One thing he did learn several years into the marriage. I sleep soundest toward morning when he is starting to wake up. He gets his snuggle time then-- I don't mind because I'm oblivious! Win-win!
Post #: 54
RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 8/27/2008 7:14:55 PM   
bzirk


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My husband is being fitted for a C-PAP this week. Should be interesting.

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Post #: 55
RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 8/29/2008 10:32:34 AM   
Christian30

 

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TorchHeart

Maybe my sleeping arrangements would be better if my wife and I didn't have a king-sized golden retriever sleeping with us on our king-sized bed every night.

Of course, I've never had to worry about the dog stealing my covers and putting his cold feet on the small of my back. Hmm.


What a hoot!
Post #: 56
RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 8/29/2008 12:28:04 PM   
abiggans

 

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My hubby is a cuddler, I am not. I am ok with it when we are just getting into bed, but once I am really going to fall asleep I prefer to do my own thing. Most nights I cuddle with him until we both fall asleep and then we usually go our separate ways, he will eventually wake up and roll over and cuddle with me again, but I really don't mind all that much. I also take a vitamin called melatonin to help me get a more restful sleep, so that helps sometimes

I figure he sleeps better cuddling and I sleep better not....so either way one of us will lose out on sleep...so we just kind of "give-in" to each other!
Post #: 57
RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 8/29/2008 10:31:30 PM   
monk-monk

 

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My husband and I were cross country truck drivers, of course when we did get a chance to come home, we were so tired we both snored. The one who went to sleep first was o.k. but the one left suffered. That is how we got use to separate bedrooms, now we love it, i don't bother him, and he doesn't bother me. We love each other very much, and it is a comfort knowing he is right across the hall, but no more sleeping together. we both can read, watch t v, toss, turn, and even eat without disturbing each other. trust me, love has nothing to do with it.
Post #: 58
RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 8/31/2008 1:56:37 PM   
bzirk


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I understand that there can be some advantages to people sleeping separately. But I also realize that one of the disadvantages is knowing when your mate has a serious condition, and this becomes more of an issue as people get older. As I mentioned, my husband is being fitted for a CPAP because he has trouble breathing at night. If I had not been sleeping in the bed with him, I'm not sure he would have realized this as soon. What he would typically do is snore a few moments, then be completely silent for a few seconds and then kick his leg or flinch in some way and start breathing again. This was a fairly subtle thing except the person in bed next to him -- me.

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may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

Great quote: I just ain't God and don't know it all. -- SonInMe1
Post #: 59
RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/1/2008 5:11:44 PM   
Homegrownkids


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I remember it took us a while before we got use to sleeping with each other. Now, it is hard not to sleep with each other. We both enjoy it.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/2/2008 12:58:35 AM   
uponeagleswings


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DH and I share a queen sized bed. Even so, there are nights we have issues sleeping. I'm a very light sleeper, and DH has insomnia issues and snores. I usually go to bed before him and get in a few good hours of sleep before he comes to bed. Generally all it takes to wake me from a sound sleep is him touching the doorknob. Often, the only way he can fall asleep is for me to rub his back, and once he is asleep he usually snores. Fortunately if I can get him to roll over he usually stops for a while. I've wondered about sleep apnea, but I never hear him stop breathing- I think his snoring is sinus-related.
He was recently out of town for a week and I was worried that I'd have trouble sleeping without him, but I actually slept really well.
We've discovered that we can't sleep snuggling- either I feel like I'm being suffocated (DH is a big guy), or his arm goes to sleep or he wakes up with a stiff neck.

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Post #: 61
RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/2/2008 6:44:46 PM   
3tulips


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Unless he has a cold and is snoring, he is very easy to sleep with

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Post #: 62
RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/2/2008 7:30:07 PM   
isaacsmom


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We've never had any problem sleeping with each other in our bed. We started off in a full size, slept just fine in one of those for 6 years, then we bought a new new bedroom suite and upgraded to queen. That made it easier to co-sleep with the babies for sure (while they were nursing). We sleep back to back.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/2/2008 10:57:32 PM   
Auben


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I didn't realize how many people don't sleep well together until reading a thread on Crosswalk a few years back.

We immediately hit it off and even joked that 'sleeping together' is a hidden satisfaction in marriage that is almost equitable to sex. There is this intense feeling of peace and well-being when we get all tangled up for the night. I actually let out this little sigh of contentment.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/3/2008 12:50:26 PM   
laughinggirl


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For the first year of our marriage, we slept on a double bed because that's what I already had in my apartment when he moved in after the wedding. We liked the togetherness and didn't mind it. When we bought a house, we got a queen-size bed and I like it better. It's nice to have a little extra room even though we are usually all snuggled up anyway. We've slept in kings before in hotel rooms and honestly, the extra room is completely wasted. We just like being close, I guess.

Thankfully, my husband doesn't snore. I love sleeping next to him. To me, that is honestly the best part about being married. Pillow talk and snuggling and waking up next to each other. Bliss.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/3/2008 7:02:21 PM   
SuccessinTruth


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We're both cuddler's but he's way too hot, so we cuddle for a while, then I get too hot and move away until I cool off, then I go back to cuddle some more. I never get a good nights sleep, but that's ok. There are more important things, like having him there to cuddle.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/10/2008 8:33:18 AM   
psalm867

 

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quote:

ORIGINAL: one thing I've started doing is getting king sized blankets for our queen size bed.


That is exactly what we finally did.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/10/2008 8:45:32 AM   
McGuinessMagee


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We have a huge king-sized doona on our bed. I love the way it hangs over the edges.

Kylie

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/10/2008 9:23:29 AM   
DaveW


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DW is not a cuddler and likes to stretch out. I weigh about 2 1/2 times what she weighs. For 30 years we slept in a full size bed. She took (I gave her) 2/3 of the bed. We never had a problem except she occasionally complained that my sleeping hanging off the edge of the bed ruined the mattress. I have slept that way since junior high school.

Last summer we took our "stimulus" check and got a queen. (BTW, today is our 31st anniversary!!)
She now has 3/4 of the bed.

We have never had a problem sleeping in the same bed, as long as I stay on the edge.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/10/2008 9:37:59 AM   
ta_mosquito


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quote:

She now has 3/4 of the bed.

LOL!!

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/10/2008 5:10:32 PM   
McGuinessMagee


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Congratulations on your anniversary DaveW

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/11/2008 11:26:15 AM   
DaveW


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quote:

ORIGINAL: McGuinessMagee

Congratulations on your anniversary DaveW
Thanks!!!!

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/11/2008 2:26:47 PM   
APZR


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I don't have a problem. But then, we have a huge king bed. The only time I have any problems sleeping is when both kids with the dog AND cat join us during thunder storms.

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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/16/2008 9:49:28 PM   
psalm867

 

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DaveW

We have never had a problem sleeping in the same bed, as long as I stay on the edge.


LOL!!

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Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.

Jeremiah 33:3
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RE: Is it easy to sleep with your spouse? - 9/17/2008 7:41:37 AM   
Harvie


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I have a hard time sleeping when my wonderful DH is gone, actually. I seem to sleep best when I'm in bed with him. He snores, but I don't mind. And he's a pretty good sport as I (apparently) hold long, detailed, enthusiastic, animated one-sided conversations in my sleep, lol!

Of course, at our house, we share our queen sized bed with anywhere from 3-6 kitty cats, depending on the weather/temperatures. (Who needs a heater in the winter when you have cats?)

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