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RE: Why do men do this? - 9/17/2008 6:11:51 PM
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dyluck
Posts: 155
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quote:
As a forgiven, redeemed, salvaged child of God, experience is a teacher and the past is a reminder. The consequences of ungodly decisions remain even after complete forgiveness from God. But my heart is clean and I have nothing to hide anymore. I am SO MUCH an open book now.
Awesome! What a wonderful expression of regeneration!!! Keep to repentance sister!
quote:
The last thing I'd like to do is offer a "warning". To women... if you are the least bit flirty, no matter how innocent you believe it is... please, please, please re-think that. It is so dangerous, and once the mutual admiration starts, it is difficult to make a U-turn. And guys... build a "wall", carry your "shield". When another woman admires you or advances on you, there is a way to be gracious and friendly without being encouraging, and remember to thank God for the strength He will provide if you depend on Him... and remember your "list of potential losses". And if you are a man that is completely turned off by the approach of a woman, thank God for the way you are made.
100% right!!! I heard somewhere on this forum using "bouncing eyes". Everyone looks at everyone, but, guys if you see good looking girls, bounce them somewhere else! Don't boost their ego by giving them the time of day.
I can only equate to why guys, as a whole, long for younger women is that younger women these days are looking older yet "tighter" and less dressed. It is a huge stumbling block for many men.
Its better to gouge out your eye then and go into life mamed then it is to follow it to hell.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 9/20/2008 3:09:34 PM
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terryjohn
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When I was ready to finally get married I had many to choose from and they ranged in age from the relatively young to those as old as 33. I chose the 33 year old for I could not imagine having much in common with the younger women even if they were more beautiful as I simply did not feel the need to look after someone so young but rather have someone my own age to help me.
And from the movies I have seen like, "the firm", the guys are really telling the truth when they say it was nothing for despite falling they do not want to leave their wives who provide the all important comfort and stability in their lives. Sure anyone would be happy to be noticed by anyone, Try it! However, when it comes to a younger woman using her sexuallity to get something she would not normally be able to then sometimes it will backfire, for I am personally never more insulted when this occurs.
Having said this, I have found that when I met younger women with whom I have something in common with like career, I am interested in talking to them as I would with others with no regard to gender, age or nationality. Unfortunately, my wife sees it otherwise and that is her fault not mine.
In the end, it does not matter for love if it is love always trusts, always hopes otherwise. If your man proves to be unfaithful that is his fault and his fault alone and he will suffer for them but you cannot do anything but love. So he runs off with another, who cares? You certainly wouldn't want to marry such a man, would you? The solution is to have your eyes set firmly on Christ and move forward in faith for love for others does not want to pocess them. You will continue to be fearful and angry until you begin to love. You could say a partners unfaithfulness is nothing, that is their sin and above all, you are blameless in Christ and loved by God.
As Paul says somewhere it is better for those of faith and love for Christ not to seek to get into such relationships considering how much trouble they cause and how much work there is to do to advance the cause of Christ and His kingdom.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 9/22/2008 12:50:31 PM
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1love1God1way
Posts: 2401
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Why are younger women falling for older men?
Pointing fingers goes both ways.
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love.ben
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RE: Why do men do this? - 9/22/2008 4:33:31 PM
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John_O
Posts: 8005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: 1love1God1way
Why are younger women falling for older men?
Pointing fingers goes both ways.
Because us more seasoned gentlemen are just too good of catches to let go by!
_____________________________
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/16/2008 2:37:35 PM
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Samitude
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I think the younger women that fall for the older men are looking for someone who will be in control and the head of their home. It's the way God made us. Some young women, I believe, are looking for stability. To their minds older means stable. He has a home, job, knows about life and can answer questions I might have. She can lean on him. He has already paved the way. If she does her own thing he will still be there when she comes back. Now, the men that are around her age are still getting settled, still running out with their guy friends (that don't include her), may be going over board in these first years being away from mom and dad and school.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/21/2008 4:40:50 AM
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SamsonUSA
Posts: 585
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quote:
ORIGINAL: twinkly
I am going to post below my response on another thread about what turns women off about men.
Here it is:
"Those men who chase after much younger girls tick me off.
amen to that one! i am standing and applauding this.
I am 37 and ended a relationship last year with a man like this. He was a year older than me but if at any time a twenty something would give him the time of day, I would get put to the back burner until they were done using him for what they could get. A man who chases younger women, to me, lacks something that they feel the need for that ego boost. I despise this in men.
My exhusband also had an affair with a younger woman and ended her marriage and ours with it. (and it didn't even last) . Nope no respect for men like that. Makes me feel old at my age because a lot of them men my age want a 25 year old. It sucks. "
Why do some men do this guys?
I mean I keep myself up, I am an attractive women, look at my profile pic, but I will tell you, I have had it happen more than once that a man I have been with has put me to the back burner when some twenty something has come along.
I'd love some insight into this.
Guilty as charged! But with an explanation your honor. First off when you posted " Those men who CHASE after much younger women tick me off" Why is every man who tends to date younger women immediately get labeled as some lecherous old man " chasing " after poor, defenseless, younger women? Have you ever stopped to think that some younger women actually prefer a more mature man?
Since I can't speak for all men who tend to date younger women I'll share with you why I do.
1) I still REALLY would like to have children some day. Most women " my age " wouldn't dream of having children.
2) I am extremely active and have found that many women in my age bracket not able to keep up with me. I'm not saying none of them can its just a fact that the majority of them can't.
3) Being a never married no kids man I sometimes have a hard time relating to women that already have teenage children. I'll admit it that most are much more emotionally mature than I am on certain levels.
4) I have also found that many women that are say late 30's early 40's that are single again after being married or in a long term relationship have a hard time with the dating thing since its been such a long time since they were actually in the dating scene. In several ways this makes dating them more difficult than a never married 20 something woman.
5) And to finish this with a bit of humor I'll borrow a line from George Clooney when he was asked " Why do you date women much younger than yourself? He replied " Because I can"
All kidding aside I'd have no reservations about dating a woman my age if God were to bring one into my life. If we felt destined to be together than we could always adopt and I would be cool with that. And I'm sure there are some great Godly women out there that are my age that I would be truly blessed to be able to date. I just haven't met any yet, and I'm not compromising on what I would expect in a future mate. So until I meet that woman I will be content on being in the place God currently has me in.
_____________________________
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and earth!
Casting Crowns
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/21/2008 7:26:19 AM
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ffbruce
Posts: 271
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quote:
ORIGINAL: twinkly
i think it is more when men my age or older are chasing around 21 year olds, etc. i am frustrated because a lot of men (the ones i have encountered anyway) aren't interested in dating me who is their age, because they want a young twenty something on their arm instead for that ego boost.
now, i will admit, this may just be the pool of men i run into. or the ones that i seem to attract. that will date me for a bit but put me to the back burner if a twenty something bats an eyelash at them. i am honestly just extremely fed up with it. i feel like i need to find a man in his fifties in order for them to be loyal to me because then *I* would be the younger woman!
I guess I'd have to wonder where and how you're meeting these guys.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/21/2008 7:29:31 AM
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ffbruce
Posts: 271
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quote:
ORIGINAL: 1love1God1way
Why are younger women falling for older men?
Pointing fingers goes both ways.
Father figure?
Financial security?
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/21/2008 1:16:08 PM
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SamsonUSA
Posts: 585
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ffbruce
quote:
ORIGINAL: 1love1God1way
Why are younger women falling for older men?
Pointing fingers goes both ways.
Father figure?
Financial security?
Mutual respect? Emotionally & physically attracted? Tired of dating men their age that lack emotional maturity?
_____________________________
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and earth!
Casting Crowns
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/21/2008 4:03:44 PM
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John_O
Posts: 8005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: SamsonUSA
Guilty as charged! But with an explanation your honor. First off when you posted " Those men who CHASE after much younger women tick me off" Why is every man who tends to date younger women immediately get labeled as some lecherous old man " chasing " after poor, defenseless, younger women? Have you ever stopped to think that some younger women actually prefer a more mature man?
Since I can't speak for all men who tend to date younger women I'll share with you why I do.
1) I still REALLY would like to have children some day. Most women " my age " wouldn't dream of having children.
2) I am extremely active and have found that many women in my age bracket not able to keep up with me. I'm not saying none of them can its just a fact that the majority of them can't.
3) Being a never married no kids man I sometimes have a hard time relating to women that already have teenage children. I'll admit it that most are much more emotionally mature than I am on certain levels.
4) I have also found that many women that are say late 30's early 40's that are single again after being married or in a long term relationship have a hard time with the dating thing since its been such a long time since they were actually in the dating scene. In several ways this makes dating them more difficult than a never married 20 something woman.
5) And to finish this with a bit of humor I'll borrow a line from George Clooney when he was asked " Why do you date women much younger than yourself? He replied " Because I can"
All kidding aside I'd have no reservations about dating a woman my age if God were to bring one into my life. If we felt destined to be together than we could always adopt and I would be cool with that. And I'm sure there are some great Godly women out there that are my age that I would be truly blessed to be able to date. I just haven't met any yet, and I'm not compromising on what I would expect in a future mate. So until I meet that woman I will be content on being in the place God currently has me in.
GREAT POST!! I agree entirely
_____________________________
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/21/2008 6:10:23 PM
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MaleorderBride
Posts: 61
Joined: 9/28/2008
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quote:
ORIGINAL: John_O
quote:
ORIGINAL: SamsonUSA
Guilty as charged! But with an explanation your honor. First off when you posted " Those men who CHASE after much younger women tick me off" Why is every man who tends to date younger women immediately get labeled as some lecherous old man " chasing " after poor, defenseless, younger women? Have you ever stopped to think that some younger women actually prefer a more mature man?
Since I can't speak for all men who tend to date younger women I'll share with you why I do.
1) I still REALLY would like to have children some day. Most women " my age " wouldn't dream of having children.
2) I am extremely active and have found that many women in my age bracket not able to keep up with me. I'm not saying none of them can its just a fact that the majority of them can't.
3) Being a never married no kids man I sometimes have a hard time relating to women that already have teenage children. I'll admit it that most are much more emotionally mature than I am on certain levels.
4) I have also found that many women that are say late 30's early 40's that are single again after being married or in a long term relationship have a hard time with the dating thing since its been such a long time since they were actually in the dating scene. In several ways this makes dating them more difficult than a never married 20 something woman.
5) And to finish this with a bit of humor I'll borrow a line from George Clooney when he was asked " Why do you date women much younger than yourself? He replied " Because I can"
All kidding aside I'd have no reservations about dating a woman my age if God were to bring one into my life. If we felt destined to be together than we could always adopt and I would be cool with that. And I'm sure there are some great Godly women out there that are my age that I would be truly blessed to be able to date. I just haven't met any yet, and I'm not compromising on what I would expect in a future mate. So until I meet that woman I will be content on being in the place God currently has me in.
GREAT POST!! I agree entirely
Same here. I agree wholeheartedly. Point number 1 needs special emphasis.
_____________________________
Let us rejoice and be glad and give the glory to Him, for the marriage of the Lamb has come and His bride has made herself ready.
Revelation 19:7
<= That ain't me by-the-way. I don't wear a handlebar mustache.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/22/2008 11:57:52 PM
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hemidart
Posts: 23
Joined: 10/22/2008
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Hi: I am so "green" at computer stuff--I don't know if my answer will even get to the complainant--but hopefully someone who accesses this will be helped.
1.Unfortunately in North America & many other countries even in MANY churches, WOMEN DRESS PROVOCATIVELY!!!Unfortunately, God has wired us men to look--but we can CHOOSE not to think wrong thoughts!! However,when continually bombarded with this kind of dress at ABOUT every venue (tv., malls, street corners, sale papers, etc.)--even the most devout, close to God , Christian man will at times fall (will admit this if honest), My worst temptation comes in a place of worship when I see women on the stage up front dressed provocatively. I have to assume that, they, being "born-again" Christians--know better--BUT the rationale is--" EVERYONE (or most other women) are doing it--so its okay". I quickly say "that doesn't make it right according to the BIBLE!!!" Also, I personally, or a man TRULY living for the Lord, lose much of my respect for that woman--because She cares nothing about her tempting a man to sin. (my opinion) To the lady complaining, I hope You are not one of these, I say as kindly as possible. Age gap doesn't really matter a whole lot. (my opinion again).
2. I guess that many women in the Church at least, when they reach near 35 or so, do begin to dress more modestly--so when a man sees a younger woman dressed "badly" he takes notice--but, as I said, Most of us, if living close to God (Jesus),do not respect her. That being said--unfortunately, the older practice of older women in the Church coaching the young, has long gone unfortunately. I am risking being ridiculed for being old-fashioned, but thats okay if it helps one person out.
3. Another direct answer to the lady is--a man who does this often, is selfish & unthoughtful of his wife as it demeans her.
Closing: I love/respect the Proverbs 31 woman, don't you men? Feel free to comment.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/25/2008 5:47:52 PM
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twinkly
Posts: 146
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Wow, lots of posts as of late. I have not been here in quite awhile because I really do not have time anymore in my life for a message board. However, a friend of mine (iwillfearnoevil) told me that there had been some responses lately so I decided to take a peak.
I think I can say, just in short, that I feel frustrated simply because it seems that men my age (which is 37) want a twenty something these days.
Someone asked where I am meeting these men. Well, my exhusband and I lived in the same apartment building so that is how we met way long ago. And the other man, we met on a message board very similar to this one back in early 2006. We talked for 5 months before ever meeting. He was/is/says he is/ a christian and we attended his church whenever I went there. He was a bigger offender of chasing younger women then my exhusband was.
Someone said they still want to have children. A lot of women these days are not even starting to have families until they are my age! I definitely want more children and would entertain that notion well into my forties. My children are not teenagers, they are young.
Do I dress provocatively? No, I don't think so. I desire to be respected by a man so I don't flaunt myself. I am confident, I am attractive, I do keep myself up. But, I am not 21 anymore and am sure I cannot compete with one.
This thread was essentially my vent at what my experiences have been thus far and the fact that, at 37, I feel like I am now even too old for them men who are my age.
I am sure not all men are this way, and maybe one day, I will come across one that is not. At this point in time I am not even looking so it matters not at the moment.
Lots of interesting thoughts on here. I do appreciate when men are being honest that is for sure.
_____________________________
God FIRST, family second, and all else will fall into place.
My side business:
http://www.arbonne.com
Let me help you make some fun mad money!
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/25/2008 10:22:24 PM
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firefighter38310
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I think men are like women and they don’t necessarily tend to look for the younger opposite sex. I have had the unique chance and not on purpose of working in a female dominated occupation. I am a male nurse. I have worked in the ER for 25+ years and 6 years in a small ER where we only had two nurses per shift.
I have always been a professional nurse both in job description and in attitude toward my coworkers. I have been married for twenty of those years and never sought relief out side my matrimonial vows; hence, I have many close female friends.
I have become close to several nurses and I have heard the female opinions on my subjects including those of sexual nature. Although some men may seek a younger woman just like some may seek a particular body type; woman are probably as guilty
I am in my second marriage and our 4th year anniversary is the 27th of November. My wife is 10 years younger than me. I was a single dad of a ten year old and had been single for 3 years prior to our meeting. When you’re a 47 year old single father living in family housing at the university; the chances of meeting a female close to my age was almost zero+/- 1. I had plenty of meeting much younger women but I chose not to. I didn’t base my relationships to be on age or anything but I am a Christian and who ever I meet would have to meet similar requirements. I was dateless for almost one entire year before I met Angie.
I know the hurt from affairs. We guys can suffer also. My former marriage was plagued by affairs from my then wife. I never knew until the last 6 months just how long they had been going on.
I do believe this from my heart, because in a short period after my divorce, I became involved with a married woman. Affairs don’t start for a sexual release or discovery but they start because something is lacking at home. The item most lacking is what people seek in each other; communication. I have heard this from a number of married women and several male friends. “I never dreamed it would turn into a physical thing.” My physical affair with her was short lived because God just wasn’t going to allow it to work. Even though I was single at the time and she was married; I knew it was wrong.
She was much younger than me but that wasn’t an attractant. We both just wanted someone to share with and those communication needs weren’t being met at home. In time we shared more personal stuff and eventually we tried the physical side of our emotions.
I love my wife and I am an open book for her. I don’t ever want her to even wonder that she isn’t anything but number one in my life after God. My wife knows the ladies I work with, she visits me at work. I don’t do personal phone calls or text from co workers because it’s not professional. The only online site I go (I am new at this) is here and she knows I post here.
Have a blessed day dave
_____________________________
if you want the mission accomlished overnight..dont call Fed-Ex call a Navy Seal Team
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/25/2008 10:56:14 PM
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John_O
Posts: 8005
Joined: 9/5/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: firefighter38310
I am in my second marriage and our 4th year anniversary is the 27th of November. My wife is 10 years younger than me. I was a single dad of a ten year old and had been single for 3 years prior to our meeting. When you’re a 47 year old single father living in family housing at the university; the chances of meeting a female close to my age was almost zero+/- 1. I had plenty of meeting much younger women but I chose not to. I didn’t base my relationships to be on age or anything but I am a Christian and who ever I meet would have to meet similar requirements. I was dateless for almost one entire year before I met Angie.
Thank you Dave. I'm kind of in that same situation. 47 with a child and yet looking to have more children. Glad to see God blessed you (Since He is no respecter of persons what's He's done for others I can believe He'll do for me)
Twinkly, Once out of college guys almost always end up with younger women. M was 5 yerasd younger than I an now that she's gone home I'm looking for someone even younger (children you know). Don't rule out guys older than you who would look at you asd an immense blessing.
_____________________________
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/26/2008 12:36:41 AM
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SamsonUSA
Posts: 585
Joined: 10/5/2008
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quote:
ORIGINAL: twinkly
Wow, lots of posts as of late. I have not been here in quite awhile because I really do not have time anymore in my life for a message board. However, a friend of mine (iwillfearnoevil) told me that there had been some responses lately so I decided to take a peak.
I think I can say, just in short, that I feel frustrated simply because it seems that men my age (which is 37) want a twenty something these days.
Someone asked where I am meeting these men. Well, my exhusband and I lived in the same apartment building so that is how we met way long ago. And the other man, we met on a message board very similar to this one back in early 2006. We talked for 5 months before ever meeting. He was/is/says he is/ a christian and we attended his church whenever I went there. He was a bigger offender of chasing younger women then my exhusband was.
Someone said they still want to have children. A lot of women these days are not even starting to have families until they are my age! I definitely want more children and would entertain that notion well into my forties. My children are not teenagers, they are young.
Do I dress provocatively? No, I don't think so. I desire to be respected by a man so I don't flaunt myself. I am confident, I am attractive, I do keep myself up. But, I am not 21 anymore and am sure I cannot compete with one.
This thread was essentially my vent at what my experiences have been thus far and the fact that, at 37, I feel like I am now even too old for them men who are my age.
I am sure not all men are this way, and maybe one day, I will come across one that is not. At this point in time I am not even looking so it matters not at the moment.
Lots of interesting thoughts on here. I do appreciate when men are being honest that is for sure.
Twinkly after reading some of your posts I wouldn't worry about one guy who treated you badly. Sounds like you just ran into a jerk who played with your feelings and didn't know what he wanted or wasn't able to emotionally handle a woman who has her stuff together.
I am older than you are and as I stated earlier I usually date women that are in the 25-32 yr old range but only because they make it known they are interested and available, something that women closer in age don't tend to do. It seems like all of the women I know that are 35+ are married anyway.
So don't worry about trying to keep up with 21 yr olds, they should worry about having to compete in the dating world with a 37 yr old woman like yourself that knows what she wants out of life. And something tells me when your ready to meet the special man that God has chosen for you that your ex and the pain he caused you will be completely forgotten.
_____________________________
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and earth!
Casting Crowns
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/26/2008 5:59:20 PM
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twinkly
Posts: 146
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Thank you and I agree. However, it was not only my exhusband who did this but my exboyfriend as well. So, it has not only happened once, but twice, right in a row.
As I said, I am not currently looking.
As I also said, for posters like John O, I may be 37 but I do still want children and will entertain that idea into my 40's. So, you do not necessarily have to be looking for a twenty something to find a woman who wants children. Not buying that one, sorry ;)
I am not opposed to dating someone older than I am, to a certain extent, as long as they still wanted more children. See, I run into that issue as well. A lot of men in their say, mid forties and beyond, do not want more children. And, I have no desire to date someone significantly younger than me because I will have nothing in common with him AND I can't stand the immaturity factor. I am not going to take care of someone, I want someone who will be MY protector and take care of me.
_____________________________
God FIRST, family second, and all else will fall into place.
My side business:
http://www.arbonne.com
Let me help you make some fun mad money!
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/26/2008 10:09:16 PM
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John_O
Posts: 8005
Joined: 9/5/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: twinkly
As I said, I am not currently looking.
As I also said, for posters like John O, I may be 37 but I do still want children and will entertain that idea into my 40's. So, you do not necessarily have to be looking for a twenty something to find a woman who wants children. Not buying that one, sorry ;)
Somehow we got our signals crossed. I'm 47 and looking for someone in the 32-40 range becuase I still want children. I couldn't deal with a 20 something....
quote:
And, I have no desire to date someone significantly younger than me because I will have nothing in common with him AND I can't stand the immaturity factor.
... for exactly this reason. There's plenty of really hot mid 20's around but I wanted to have children of my own, not marry someone else's. (and all the twenties are going to get their undies knotted at me now  )
quote:
I am not going to take care of someone, I want someone who will be MY protector and take care of me.
You see I am looking for someone to take care of, but the maturity level has got to be right.
My point in the post you repsonded to is that guys normally marry younger. 37's will be looking for late 20's, etc.
You mentioned the wanting children and getting resistance on it. Just imagine how it looks from my end. MOst women assume that I don't want kids anymore. On both dating sites I'm on I keep getting women out of their childbearing years contacting me even though I say in my profile that having more children is very important to me. People apparently only read what they want to see.
_____________________________
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/28/2008 7:47:51 AM
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twinkly
Posts: 146
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See, it discourages me to see you write that most 37 year old men will be looking for a twenty something.. excuse my language, but that SUCKS! THAT is exactly why I feel I need to be in competition with those twenty somethings by keeping myself young and looking young, etc. IT SHOULD NOT HAVE TO BE THAT WAY.
I don't think there will be a lot of men your age John that will want to have more children. I think women should ask before assuming, BUT, you have kids that late in life and you are dealing with teenagers in your sixties which a lot of men do not want to do.
It doesn't matter. My feelings on the subject are not going to change the reality.
There will be a good man in my life one day. I am not actively looking. When I am ready to look I will. But I do feel that longing for more children when I see people with babies or toddlers.
_____________________________
God FIRST, family second, and all else will fall into place.
My side business:
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Let me help you make some fun mad money!
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/28/2008 12:52:45 PM
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SamsonUSA
Posts: 585
Joined: 10/5/2008
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quote:
ORIGINAL: twinkly
See, it discourages me to see you write that most 37 year old men will be looking for a twenty something.. excuse my language, but that SUCKS! THAT is exactly why I feel I need to be in competition with those twenty somethings by keeping myself young and looking young, etc. IT SHOULD NOT HAVE TO BE THAT WAY.
I don't think there will be a lot of men your age John that will want to have more children. I think women should ask before assuming, BUT, you have kids that late in life and you are dealing with teenagers in your sixties which a lot of men do not want to do.
It doesn't matter. My feelings on the subject are not going to change the reality.
There will be a good man in my life one day. I am not actively looking. When I am ready to look I will. But I do feel that longing for more children when I see people with babies or toddlers.
Twinkly I think if you would put your complete trust in the Lord when it comes to bringing someone in your life you'll have peace about this and not sound so frustrated. Your comments that I highlighted show that you feel the who and when you'll settle down with is a decision that is left entirely up to you and not God. As in every other aspect of our lives He will bring that special someone in our life in His perfect timing, and not our own.
_____________________________
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and earth!
Casting Crowns
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/28/2008 6:10:22 PM
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twinkly
Posts: 146
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I agree with that Samson.
_____________________________
God FIRST, family second, and all else will fall into place.
My side business:
http://www.arbonne.com
Let me help you make some fun mad money!
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/28/2008 7:43:21 PM
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John_O
Posts: 8005
Joined: 9/5/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: twinkly
See, it discourages me to see you write that most 37 year old men will be looking for a twenty something.. excuse my language, but that SUCKS!
I agree. but that's the way it is. We can either curse the darkness or light a candle
quote:
THAT is exactly why I feel I need to be in competition with those twenty somethings by keeping myself young and looking young, etc.
a.) shouldn't we be taking care of ourselves and keeping ourselves looking good any way? Take care of your body and it will take care of you. Keep your skin protected and young. Stay in good shape. Don't let the weight get out of control. Keep a simle on your face and a praise in your heart. Someone who does this will be happier, will feel better and will look younger.
b.) You're not in competition. the one you are looking for is looking for you. not a twenty something
quote:
IT SHOULD NOT HAVE TO BE THAT WAY.
We shouldn't have to die either. But we do.
quote:
I don't think there will be a lot of men your age John that will want to have more children. I think women should ask before assuming, BUT, you have kids that late in life and you are dealing with teenagers in your sixties which a lot of men do not want to do.
No, but you're nopt looking for a lot of men. Just one.
quote:
There will be a good man in my life one day.
yes there will be.
_____________________________
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/30/2008 4:34:25 PM
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John_O
Posts: 8005
Joined: 9/5/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: misunderstoodduck
Pardon my buttinsky JOHN O, but this truly bothers me because twinkly has a valid point.
quote:
ORIGINAL: twinkly
See, it discourages me to see you write that most 37 year old men will be looking for a twenty something.. excuse my language, but that SUCKS!
and you tell her that you agree. but that's the way it is. We can either curse the darkness or light a candle.
NO, we can also try to help the blind to see!
And what would that do? So we convince a bunch of men to seek wives their own age. (which in many cases would mean giving up the hope of children etc). Now we have men marrying women who serve as a constant reminder to them of everything they have given up instead of being looked at as a blessing. Would you really want a man who looks at you that way? Wouldn't you rather have a man who looks at you as the blessing you are?
Lets assume for the moment that men who seek after younger wives are being shallow and imature. IS that teh kind of man you want? Isn't it better that he removes himself from your pool of potentials before ruining your life too? (Of course not all men who seek younger wives are immature or shallow)
Twinkly does have a valid point. But that doesn't change reality.
quote:
and to twinkly mentioning feeling the need to be in competition with those twenty somethings by keeping herself young and looking young, etc. you said "a.) shouldn't we be taking care of ourselves and keeping ourselves looking good any way? Take care of your body and it will take care of you. Keep your skin protected and young. Stay in good shape. Don't let the weight get out of control. Keep a simle on your face and a praise in your heart. Someone who does this will be happier, will feel better and will look younger.
To a degree, but it DEFINITELY is not that simple for all or in all cases. Not everyone is blessed with good genes, thick heads of hair, supple skin, healthy nerve cells, or even basic good health due to hereditary health issues... and these issues only worsen with age.
We should all be working to the best of our abilities to maintain/improve what we've been given. Being a good steward starts at home. I know women older than I am who look stunning (no surgery involved) I know women a couple years younger than I who look twenty something. I know a woman who's had 9 kids who's as thin as a model. Sure there was some genetic help but there was also a lot of clean living.
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and passonately twinkly expresses her frustration by saying IT SHOULD NOT HAVE TO BE THAT WAY.
and you reply, "We shouldn't have to die either. But we do." Ouch. Ouch. OUCH! That's cold. We wouldn't have to do a lot of things had Adam & Eve obeyed, but since they did not, we have to deal with a LOT of (excuse my language, but to quote twinkly) SUCKY things. That does not make it right, nor fair, nor just, nor even acceptable, but nonetheless, you are right, we should not have to die and IT SHOULD NOT HAVE TO BE THAT WAY, but it is what it is.
So is bacteria and funk. It is what it is.
Exactly. Some things we cannot change and it does no good to complain about them. Just praise God and do the best with what He's given us.
Twinkly will find a guy who wants her. How could she ask for anything better than that?
_____________________________
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/30/2008 5:24:19 PM
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1mlasp
Posts: 210
Joined: 12/9/2005
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Well, I'm in my early 40's and will want someone my own age when I am ready to date again.
I don't understand why some men would prefer a teeny-bopper either (and I'm a man). I'm done having kids, so I wouldn't want a youngin' for that.
Why would I want a life partner who doesn't remember the moon landings, Watergate, the Carol Burnett Show, boat people, 25 cent comic books, the Iranian hostages, streakers, a somewhat normal Michael Jackson, John Lennons' shooting, the A-Team, the Dr. Pepper jingle, the royal wedding, a "thousand points of light," etc.? That would be boring after a few years, just as I would eventually bore someone who remembers the Rat Pack, 10 cent comic books, etc.
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RE: Why do men do this? - 10/30/2008 7:53:56 PM
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twinkly
Posts: 146
Joined: 6/21/2008
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I do not doubt that I will have a man in my life again at some point. HOWEVER, since I have been burned by shallow men a few times here and gotten tossed to the side for my younger counterpart on more than one occasion, I will be using a magnifying glass for my next potential relationship partner! I will be more careful then ever before. And hopefully I will be able to find a man at some point who is close to my age that will not feel I am too old for them because my age does not begin with a 2.
God will bring one along I am sure. He will know when I am ready.
But yes, I do believe over all we live in a very shall | | |
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