Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated?

Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (Full Version)

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[Poll]

It makes me very upset when people get upset at each other.

15% (9)

People upset with each other I don't mind, but don't get mad at me.

10% (6)

I don't get upset, but I don't enjoy it either.

17% (10)

I think threads are interesting when they get heated up.

28% (16)

I like to lurk in threads where things might get hot, just for kicks.

12% (7)

I cause trouble on purpose when things get too dull.

1% (1)

Other

14% (8)

Total Votes : 57

(last vote on : 6/28/2008 5:12:49 AM)
(Poll will run till: -- )

Message

Consecrated2God -> Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 3:13:29 PM)
I'm asking this in the Women's folder because I want to hear from women, so please leave it here, mods. [:)] Every now and then a thread here will get heated and women will get upset at each other. I know we all have different personalities, so I was wondering if you enjoy a thread that gets heated or if you hate it and are upset that people are getting upset. I just thought it would be interesting to talk about. [:)]

saraha98 -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 3:16:41 PM)
I find it very unchristian-like

BlessedMamaofmany -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 3:20:42 PM)
I rather enjoy a good debate...provided it's all good at the end, no hard feelings... of course, that doesn't always happen and sometimes someone will say something that is either out of line, or gets taken out of context...hurt feelings ensue... I guess, for me, it boils down to: Heated? Sure! Let's have a fun debate! Mean? No thanks...

Brandy -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 3:23:08 PM)
It really depends on the topic and circumstances. Heated discussion is sometimes needed to get to the root issue and/or bring up other ideas. I don't mind heated when it's needed to get through something. What I mind is when someone makes a thread/comment personal and gets upset, throws a fit and makes it all about them when it's not. If a person throws a fit and yet comes back apologizes and moves on I appreciate their humility and ability to recognize their ownership of their reactions. Sometimes though I do laugh to myself when I see what a person gets riled up about, we can be real petty at times.

isaacsmom -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 3:28:50 PM)
It depends on the topic. I don't like the meaness, drama, and personal attacks. That is not Christlike. Good, civil debate can be productive and thought-provoking. I don't mind that.

Nicole_Michelle -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 3:36:20 PM)
What Rachel said. [8D] Whether someone is born again or not I still don't like to see them being rude, mean and insensitive towards other people. It makes me feel sad in some cases. Other times I just ignore it. When a family member or friend is hurt I will sometimes get extremely angry feeling.

solo_soprano22 -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 3:36:46 PM)
Hmm, I think it's okay as long as people refrain from the personal attack. There are several things I disagree with a majority of the women here about, and I'd debate them, but it seems like too often someone ends up being called a name or their Christianity is questioned or something because two people don't think alike. I'd rather it be a civil thread, even if it is a debate.

SweetLittleErin -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 3:59:13 PM)
I like a good discussion, but really dont like things getting "heated" (at least by my definition of it anyway). When I am a participant I find myself getting my feelings hurt too easy (one of my main flaws...taking stuff too personal). But also when I am not participating I feel badly for ladies I see getting their feeling hurt, whether they are right or wrong. So I really hate to see threads get "heated" but I do enjoy a good discussion.

slushie -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 4:28:47 PM)
I do like a good discussion as well. But I don't like it when people get mad and start bad talking each other.

Sideways -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 4:32:46 PM)
I also enjoy a good debate, but on the other hand, I've had one poster on this forum level some of the most hurtful, ugly things at me that you can imagine. I almost left CW entirely because of that poster. So, now I've learned to take a step back and pick my threads carefully. I don't get angry when people challenge my point of view, but when attacks get unnecessarily personal, that's my cue to get out.

manda59 -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 4:34:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God Every now and then a thread here will get heated and women will get upset at each other. I know we all have different personalities, so I was wondering if you enjoy a thread that gets heated or if you hate it and are upset that people are getting upset. I just thought it would be interesting to talk about. [:)] Maybe you could define "heated", as some here are taking it to be a bad thing, whereas I don't personally see "heated" discussions to be necessarily negative.

SweetLittleErin -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 4:35:41 PM)
I know what you mean, Sideways. I have learned that I am TOO sensitive and just carefully pick and choose what I share and what threads I participate in. I've taken CW breaks because of it. Now I know what topics are "hot topics" for me and I generally stay away from those areas. There are some threads I wont even read.

Roberta_ -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 4:43:08 PM)
I went with "I think threads are interesting when they get heated up" and "other." I don't mind threads getting heated up else where. In fact, I participate in many of them and have even been known to start few of them. However, I don't like heated threads in this forum. Y'all are probably gonna think I'm weird --- OK, never mind you already know I'm weird! I imagine us like sisters. This is our home. We go out to the other forums and have to deal with the heat. We come in here. Have a nice tall glass of sweet tea or lemonade that the men have graciously prepared and left for us. The men come back around and refill out drinks without us even asking. Kiddos bring us all kinds of goodies to nibble on that are fat free, calorie free and tasty. We don't have to even ask for this. They occasionally do interrupt to see if we are ready for our pedicures. However, we are ladies so we can forgive that interruption. We have found that we can very effectively sit and solve the world's problems while ~~gossipping about~~ encouraging and uplifting each other. [:D]

Nicole_Michelle -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 4:48:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sideways I also enjoy a good debate, but on the other hand, I've had one poster on this forum level some of the most hurtful, ugly things at me that you can imagine. I almost left CW entirely because of that poster. So, now I've learned to take a step back and pick my threads carefully. I don't get angry when people challenge my point of view, but when attacks get unnecessarily personal, that's my cue to get out. When I first started posting here I was using a different name. And no, it was before I was even tyrubonchi. One poster was crazy mean to me and made me so upset and mad so I changed my login name and avoided that person for the longest time. [:D]

Nicole_Michelle -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 4:50:50 PM)
I will admit that I have laughed at some threads that get "heated" when I find the reason for the "heated" discussion to be lamer than lame. [8D] Sometimes people and their stubborness make me laugh.

Roberta_ -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 4:51:16 PM)
Gosh, I hope it wasn't me! I didn't know you were tyrubonchi! When I was Hischild1994, many didn't even know I was a girl.

Nicole_Michelle -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 4:54:08 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DenimDiva Gosh, I hope it wasn't me! I didn't know you were tyrubonchi! When I was Hischild1994, many didn't even know I was a girl. LOL no it wasn't you. This was like.... uhhhh 3 years ago probably. Yep, me be tyrubonchi. I got sick of seeing that name so I changed it. Most people thought I was a dude too. [:D]

Consecrated2God -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 5:03:17 PM)
I didn't realize you were tyrubonchi, either, Nicole! quote: Maybe you could define "heated", as some here are taking it to be a bad thing, whereas I don't personally see "heated" discussions to be necessarily negative. Mmm, I think it's kind of hard to define, since there are certainly many degrees of hot. A mildly hot thread would be one where everyone comes out of the woodwork to post and everytime you check your subscriptions there's a new post and someone has crossposted you, and people are pretty much evenly divided on the issue. It will got hotter if there's people getting upset by the disagreement, and when it gets the hottest, that's when the mods start stepping in to put out the flames. Then posts (and sometimes posters!) disappear, and if you aren't a mod and can't read the deleted post, you might miss out on what actually went down. (One of the things I miss about moderating!) I find it interesting in the same way I find looking at tornado damage or the aftermath of a fire interesting. It's a morbid fascination I guess, but I can't help but watch. I'm not so far gone that I'll lurk in threads I have no interest in, but I do sometimes try and stir the pot a little. I'd rather not be too involved myself in the discussion if it gets heated, but I don't mind watching. I do get sad when someone leaves because of it, though.

doinkdom -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 5:06:50 PM)
I only get aggravated when someone makes a personal conviction into a general doctrine for everyone. Other than that...debate away. I usually just get bored with it and unsubscribe after a while. Many times it just becomes a standoff. Where's the fun in that? [:D]

Consecrated2God -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 5:08:44 PM)
quote: usually just get bored with it and unsubscribe after a while. Many times it just becomes a standoff. Where's the fun in that? I agree. It's more fun when the other side gets totally blasted out of the water! [8D] j/k

Roberta_ -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 5:13:00 PM)
LOL!

Karaboo2 -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 5:16:09 PM)
I'm with everyone who says go ahead and debate ... but lose the personal attacks!!! There are other ways to get a point across without blasting the character of the various posters. So heat it up -- put it over an open flame ... just don't curse at the one holding the pothandle!!

nicole6598 -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 6:22:37 PM)
I am hoping the person who picked "I stir trouble on purpose" is joking.... I don't like it when things get nasty and accusations are thrown about. I don't like it when people's character or their stance with God are questioned. I don't like it when you see someone who is hurting getting questions thrown at them like grenades. There are decent, polite and kind ways to debate and investigate things. You can tell the people who are trying to stir trouble or who are waiting for someone to slip up so they can go into "attack" mode. And sadly, its the women I think who are the worst at being nasty on the forums.

manda59 -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 6:28:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sideways I also enjoy a good debate, but on the other hand, I've had one poster on this forum level some of the most hurtful, ugly things at me that you can imagine. I almost left CW entirely because of that poster. So, now I've learned to take a step back and pick my threads carefully. I don't get angry when people challenge my point of view, but when attacks get unnecessarily personal, that's my cue to get out. Personal attacks are against TOS, so actually, no-one needs to "get out" nor leave, because all we need to do is report it and the mods will deal with it. At the same time, though, I feel it must be said that I've learned over the years to just see posts as words on a screen, opinions, ventings etc, and really, unless it's coming from someone I care about and have a friendship with, it doesn't bother me what they say, personal attack or not. In fact, if someone online gets really aerated with my opinions, I actually find it mildly amusing, to imagine that my typed words have that much power!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! [;)][:D] I can honestly say that it doesn't offend me one bit even if people get unpleasant with me. I don't define myself by people's opinions, so it's like water off a duck's back. I wasn't always that way, but over time have learned how to get a more balanced perspective and outlook. The best reality check ever was when my husband one day said to me (while I was sitting here grizzling - way before my CW days I hasten to add!) - "Manda, if it upsets you that much, you can always switch it off!" What a very wise restorer of perspective!!

reach -> RE: Do you love or hate it when a thread gets heated? (6/18/2008 6:36:00 PM)
It is hard to get my point accross sometimes on the internet, so I try to not get involved in those dicussions. Sometimes it is amusing to me though. :)

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