RE: "I couldn't handle it". What does that mean, anyway?
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RE: "I couldn't handle it". What does that me... - 6/5/2008 1:59:10 PM
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solo_soprano22
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From: I'm a Southern girl
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Roberta, I keep trying to stress that people don't handle everything the same... what seems "handleable" to one can't be handled by every other person. I've spent a great deal of time studying psychiatry-related sciences (I hope to study them a bit in doctoral work, IF somewhere takes me), and many can't seem to get over the fact that something trivial to them is NOT trivial to someone else. Their inability to "handle" will work on their stability, and unfortunately some end up in an institution. I can tell from the way some people talk that they think everyone should be able to handle anything without "losing it." The point is that you're not them...you might have the ability to never end up that way...but not everyone is you...and everyone has a different life (with different circumstances, environments, and factors). Some people may SOUND like they're saying they can't handle something, but really mean that they don't want to handle it. The problem is, it may sound like they don't want to handle it, but we canNOT know IF they can handle it and stay mentally sane. We only really know that about ourselves, and sometimes we don't even know that.
Several of my family members have been committed. My uncle has been out of touch with reality for decades...still in and out of institutions, on meds...now he has schizo also and hears voices...one of which told him to kill his brother (my dad). Some of my cousins are in mental wards right now. The "cracking" point may seem trivial, but it may have been affected by circumstances that we don't know or other factors (kind of like it was the straw that broke the camel's back-- the "little thing" was the straw...but there was plenty of other straw there that we didn't see). I don't think it's fair to try to say whether or not someone is exaggerating; after what I've seen, nothing's impossible. Keeping the kids for that extra hour might just push them over... when it seems like nothing to you or me (just as an example-- not saying that keeping kids makes people insane  ).
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For God, For Learning, Forever.
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RE: "I couldn't handle it". What does that me... - 6/5/2008 2:02:35 PM
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Roberta_
Posts: 7000
Joined: 9/28/2007
From: East Bay Area
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quote:
ORIGINAL: solo_soprano22
Roberta, I keep trying to stress that people don't handle everything the same... what seems "handle able" to one can't be handled by every other person. I've spent a great deal of time studying psychiatry-related sciences (I hope to study them a bit in doctoral work, IF somewhere takes me), and many can't seem to get over the fact that something trivial to them is NOT trivial to someone else. Their inability to "handle" will work on their stability, and unfortunately some end up in an institution. I can tell from the way some people talk that they think everyone should be able to handle anything without "losing it." The point is that you're not them...you might have the ability to never end up that way...but not everyone is you...and everyone has a different life (with different circumstances, environments, and factors). Some people may SOUND like they're saying they can't handle something, but really mean that they don't want to handle it. The problem is, it may sound like they don't want to handle it, but we can NOT know IF they can handle it and stay mentally sane. We only really know that about ourselves, and sometimes we don't even know that.
Several of my family members have been committed. My uncle has been out of touch with reality for decades...still in and out of institutions, on meds...now he has schizo also and hears voices...one of which told him to kill his brother (my dad). Some of my cousins are in mental wards right now. The "cracking" point may seem trivial, but it may have been affected by circumstances that we don't know or other factors (kind of like it was the straw that broke the camel's back-- the "little thing" was the straw...but there was plenty of other straw there that we didn't see). I don't think it's fair to try to say whether or not someone is exaggerating; after what I've seen, nothings impossible. Keeping the kids for that extra hour might just push them over... when it seems like nothing to you or me (just as an example-- not saying that keeping kids makes people insane ).
I wasn't trying to pick on any one's post. Sorry if I appeared to do that. What I was getting at is that there are things that we think we can't handle and then find that we can.
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RE: "I couldn't handle it". What does that me... - 6/5/2008 2:08:17 PM
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solo_soprano22
Posts: 2479
Joined: 4/27/2005
From: I'm a Southern girl
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I know. :) I wasn't trying to say you were picking on anyone. Lol. I was more replying to other posts on the first two pages. I just mentioned yours because I saw you mentioned the mental side of things. Some of the posts I was really reffering to have the tone that people are "just saying" this or that when they really can handle it. I was just trying to saw we don't know what anyone else can/can't handle unless we're them.
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For God, For Learning, Forever.
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RE: "I couldn't handle it". What does that me... - 6/5/2008 2:13:37 PM
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Roberta_
Posts: 7000
Joined: 9/28/2007
From: East Bay Area
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quote:
ORIGINAL: solo_soprano22
I know. :) I wasn't trying to say you were picking on anyone. Lol. I was more replying to other posts on the first two pages. I just mentioned yours because I saw you mentioned the mental side of things. Some of the posts I was really referring to have the tone that people are "just saying" this or that when they really can handle it. I was just trying to saw we don't know what anyone else can/can't handle unless we're them.
Yup!
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RE: "I couldn't handle it". What does that me... - 6/5/2008 3:45:51 PM
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Consecrated2God
Posts: 4984
Joined: 4/4/2005
From: Formerly Jesus Land
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quote:
Some of the posts I was really reffering to have the tone that people are "just saying" this or that when they really can handle it.
The thing is, I think some people (not all) are just saying that as an excuse because they don't want to. It's a way to get someone off their back when they don't want them to hassle them about something. For example, let's say I need help teaching a Sunday School class and I ask a mother to help, and she says, "No, I'm sorry, I'd love to help, really, I just can't handle being in the same room with ten little kids for a half hour". Now she's the only one who knows if a half hour of dealing with children would drive her into an institution, or if she's already overcommitted and can't take on anymore, or just is using it as an excuse because she doesn't want to. But if she is just using it as an excuse, saying that she can't handle it makes her pretty much immune to any more questions. I can't come back with, "Oh sure you can!" because I don't know if she's making excuses or not. That would sound totally uncaring and unsympathetic. So I say, "Oh, okay" and I go ask someone else. I think people do that a lot. It gets them sympathy and gets them out of work.
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