Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others?

Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (Full Version)

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Little_1 -> Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 3:49:15 PM)
No matter which Christian forum you visit - there will always be Christians who don't agree with each other on every single doctrine. This is a plain fact. Perhaps God in His wisdom knew this would happen but He can bring good out of it because it makes us draw deeper into His Word to determine what His Word actually teaches. This is just a thought - I don't know for sure - I have only wondered this and I know other Christians have wondered this likewise. However, this is not entirely the reason for this post but to ask the question: Q - Why do Christians who don't agree with each other's posts become defensive and in some cases sarcastic? No matter what gifts we have and no matter how well we communicate our knowledge of the Bible over any Christian forum(s) - if we are not walking in love then we are not serving the Lord well and are doing more harm than good. The Word without the Spirit is dead!

colliefan -> RE: Why are some of God's sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 4:14:18 PM)
They get their feelings intertwined with their doctrine. And when their doctrine is challenged they feel threatend. In terms of doctrine, there are major and minor points of doctrine and when someone feels what is a major point of doctrine and it is called a minor point, feelings again get hurt.

Little_1 -> RE: Why are some of God's sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 5:07:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: colliefan They get their feelings intertwined with their doctrine. And when their doctrine is challenged they feel threatend. In terms of doctrine, there are major and minor points of doctrine and when someone feels what is a major point of doctrine and it is called a minor point, feelings again get hurt. Yes - I agree and it's no excuse for worldly responses. If we were truly concerned and loved our brethren, we would seek to build them up and not break them down in our responses (even if we do feel our doctrine is not being respected in the same way by others and it grieves us). The power of life and death are in the tongue. Sometimes we have to agree to disagree respectfully and if we still feel strongly that our brethren are walking in error and we have shared all we can to the point of the Holy Spirit pulling a reign in on us in our conscious - we should not grieve the Holy Spirit and bow out gracefully and continue to pray about the matter.

mvic -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 6:27:56 PM)
I am fairly new at visiting Christian Forums and, like you, have often wondered why respondents become defensive to the point of rudeness when disagreeing to what has been said in various posts. I suppose we all have our beliefs and are convinced that we are right and, therefore, anyone else whose views differ must be wrong. Sad isn't it? Especially since we should all agree with Jesus' commandment to love one another. On this very Forum my views have been described as "ignorant". I chose not to respond. Thank you for asking a question which needed asking. Well done.

LCannon -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 7:07:32 PM)
Often people have preconceived reasons(or biases)that are 'understood' to be true, or nearly true(armchair theology); a little knowledge is a dangerous thing. When that 'little knowledge' is challenged(or threatened)usually there's two responses, either try to bolster one argument by personal recrimination or biding one's time and let them stew in their own juices bearing in mind I have no control over any response. I just consider the source!

sparkleingsnow -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 7:46:45 PM)
Hi Little_1 [sm=wave.gif] Very good question. And I would say it's not just on christian forums, but any where christians gather. In part I think (as others have said), we let our "I" get in God's way. It sure doesn't honor Him. You can kind of understand it in a new christian who hasn't grown and don't truely know how they are to love, but ... With that being said, we are all still growing and will be till we go home to be with the Lord. I know I havn't hit perfect yet. lol So how should we treat another believer who treats us in an unloving way? With Love.

funny_girl -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 8:05:23 PM)
I was feeling the same way![:(] Although I do enjoy sarcasm very much if it's in fun! I don't care for sarcasm that is meant to make someone else feel bad about themselves. I also don't like the feeling of being on trial. As if I need to prove myself. Oh well, I receive plenty of respect from those who know me. I think there's many people that read and post that aren't like the handful of cynical ones. It's the cynism that I can do WITHOUT![sm=popsigh.gif] Thank you very much![sm=farmersmile.gif]

URForgiven -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 10:11:14 PM)
You are right to call it worldly, for it is the way of the world. One would hope that in Christianity it would be different. The anonymity of these forums is part of it. People feel free to treat others in a way they never would in the "real" world, simply because they are cloaked, hovering over their computer screens. Again, one would hope that it would be different for Christians. But, Christianity is not like the world. So these forums reveal something of the true nature of the individual, do they not? Christianity is not a competition. Peace.

drcain -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 11:42:37 PM)
quote: Q - Why do Christians who don't agree with each other's posts become defensive and in some cases sarcastic? Simple answer? Pride. The oldest sin recorded is pride. "I see it my way and if you don't, you are an idiot." Sound familiar? That is pride. The idea that "my way" is better than "your way" in the context of the OP is a stumbling block that I myself has had to overcome (and still do). <sarcasm> I don't agree that you agree that Christians don't agree to agree, and your mother dresses you funny. </sarcasm>

SonInMe1 -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/20/2008 11:46:43 PM)
This topic comes up from time to time and I am surprised its not a one stop thread yet. You can't control what other people do. You can't "nice" them to change and you can't "mean" them to change. This form of communication is often a lot more blunt than what some want to express I think. Some people are just blunt, thinking diplomacy is a waste of time...or are not good at it. Some people are just too thin skinned and find offense at every disagreement. Some people's doctrines are so wacked out, the incredulous response to ludricrousy is mistaken for hostility. Some may just be having a bad day...week...month...lifetime. Not all of us live in Ivory Towers. Some may not be saved...or are just saved....or need maturity.

zamdad -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 12:33:37 AM)
quote: Q - Why do Christians who don't agree with each other's posts become defensive and in some cases sarcastic? No matter what gifts we have and no matter how well we communicate our knowledge of the Bible over any Christian forum(s) - if we are not walking in love then we are not serving the Lord well and are doing more harm than good. The Word without the Spirit is dead! While it's hard to disgaree with what you say, sometimes love has to be confrontational. If someone has warped doctrine or may be preaching one thing and practicing another, letting them walk along blindly into danger is not love. Sometimes the discussion that take place here actually help me andothers to grow in our faith. To study and know why we believe what we believe rather than simply spitting out the party line. I know that Ican sometimes come across harsh or abrasive on these forums sometimes. Yet, it's not done in anger or hatred. It's done in to get others to see things from outside themselves and their own perspective. I know I have had some very interesting discussions on these boards with a variety of people. It seems that one thing we all have in common is that we see the world through the lens of our own experience. All too often our experience does not match that of another. If we don't seek to understand, we're les likely to be understood.

Cloak -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 8:15:26 AM)
It's really sad and heart-breaking to see these things happen among folks who call themselves Christians!

DaveW -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 8:55:58 AM)
At least part of the problem is that certain groups' pet doctrines are considered absolutely indespensible, and if they were to give it up the group would have no reason to exist. When someone else challenges that position, they have no option but to either fight back, give up and change or bow out of the discussion altogether. These discussions become very emotionally tangled up.

Little_1 -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 12:34:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: zamdad quote: Q - Why do Christians who don't agree with each other's posts become defensive and in some cases sarcastic? No matter what gifts we have and no matter how well we communicate our knowledge of the Bible over any Christian forum(s) - if we are not walking in love then we are not serving the Lord well and are doing more harm than good. The Word without the Spirit is dead! While it's hard to disgaree with what you say, sometimes love has to be confrontational. If someone has warped doctrine or may be preaching one thing and practicing another, letting them walk along blindly into danger is not love. Sometimes the discussion that take place here actually help me and others to grow in our faith. To study and know why we believe what we believe rather than simply spitting out the party line. I know that Ican sometimes come across harsh or abrasive on these forums sometimes. Yet, it's not done in anger or hatred. It's done in to get others to see things from outside themselves and their own perspective. Yes - I agree - we should highlight error and do so in a spirit of love for if we do not examine our hearts before we respond to posts which we don't agree along with, we could respond 'in the flesh' which could cause harm/factions. The Bible teaches that a fool reveals what is in their heart (Link) so we need to be so careful not to be foolish and seek the Holy Spirit's guidance which is especially relevant when varying beliefs are obvious.

zamdad -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 12:49:44 PM)
quote: Yes - I agree - we should highlight error and do so in a spirit of love for if we do not examine our hearts before we respond to posts which we don't agree along with, we could respond 'in the flesh' which could cause harm/factions. The Bible teaches that a fool reveals what is in their heart so we need to be careful not to be foolish and seek the Holy Spirit's guidance when posting at all times. Ahh, but what is this "spirit of love?" I am in agreement with you Little_1. I find myself befuddled by the many different perceptions of whay love is. Scripture is pretty clear about love as it's addressed many times. Yet, having worked with convicts for the past 16 years, I have seen far too many Christians try to love offenders back into the community only to enable the offenders to continue in the olod ways. While seeking the trust of the offender, they have overlooked so many "little things" that the snowball effect made the cumulation of the little things into something even more destructive to everyone. At the same time, when posting here, I find it helpful to read through something and digest it before responding. Especially if it's something that challenges my position or strikes a nerve.

URForgiven -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 1:53:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: zamdad At the same time, when posting here, I find it helpful to read through something and digest it before responding. Especially if it's something that challenges my position or strikes a nerve. Good and wise counsel indeed.

Little_1 -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 1:57:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: URForgiven quote: ORIGINAL: zamdad At the same time, when posting here, I find it helpful to read through something and digest it before responding. Especially if it's something that challenges my position or strikes a nerve. Good and wise counsel indeed. Definately.

Little_1 -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 2:19:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: zamdad quote: Ahh, but what is this "spirit of love?" I am in agreement with you Little_1. I find myself befuddled by the many different perceptions of whay love is. Scripture is pretty clear about love as it's addressed many times. Yet, having worked with convicts for the past 16 years, I have seen far too many Christians try to love offenders back into the community only to enable the offenders to continue in the olod ways. While seeking the trust of the offender, they have overlooked so many "little things" that the snowball effect made the cumulation of the little things into something even more destructive to everyone. Zamdad - in prayerful response to your quote above re: offenders (but it could also apply to anyone): Sometimes we think the old saying "love the sinner but hate their sin" means we 'overlook sin' but I don't believe that is what is meant by this well-known saying. Furthermore, I don't believe we would do anyone any favours if we overlook deliberate, willful sin, e.g. Proverbs 28:13 - 13 "He who covers his sins will not prosper, But whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy." Whilst I believe we are called to love one another - sometimes that love will mean we need to point out wilfull sin in such a way as not to make them feel stupid or condemned (i.e. in a spirit of love). If however, someone determines in their hearts that they are going to keep on sinning and they are not willing to repent - then that is a different matter and the church needs to take appropriate measures as set out in Matthew Chapter 18: 15-20 "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.'17If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector." Yet how often do our churches ever pay any attention to this? More often than not - churches are not practising the above and we wonder why we have problems sadly. Love without Biblical chastisement is no love really at all. God's Word teaches us in Proverbs 3:12 - For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth. When it is appropriate to chastise therefore it is because one loves but there is a right way to chastise and a wrong way. Loving chastisement is to convict of sin and bring life and hope whereas unloving chastisement condemns and brings harm. We are called to love one another but we are not to ignore determined, willful sin! We need to be wise as to when we stop 'casting our pearls before the swine'. There comes a time when you have to let the person know that unless they repent and turn from their willful sinful ways, that they are no longer able to join in the fellowship until they do genuinely repent. As long as they know they will be welcomed back if they repent and not rejected if they do. Sometimes this makes them come to their senses and repent and sometimes they will just not obey Biblical correction. See also posts #20 and #21. As long as God's direction as laid out in the Bible has been carefully and prayerfully followed - then there is little else you can do but continue to pray for them. At the end of the day, you may have to let them go and if this is the case continue to pray that the Lord will have mercy and continue to strive with them and bring them to repentance at some point in their lives journey.

lpt -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 2:29:52 PM)
You're surprised that sinners ... sin?

frankman -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 5:40:51 PM)
[sm=christianity.jpg] If your on a public forum and you want to be effective, be prepared to give a hit and also be prepared to take a hit. If we as Christians are not prepared to take a hit every now and then that may be a little bit rude at times, I`m sorry, but maybe we`re in the wrong ministry. Christian forums sometimes deal with spiritual warfare issues, and as a result some people will respond in a rude way. (!) It may mean you got to them. We also all see things from a different perspective and therefore we will not all agree. The other day somebody posted that no matter what you post here, somebody will always disagree with you. They used as an example, if you post that the sky is blue, somebody will post and disagree with you. That someone was nearly me because I looked up and saw that my sky was very grey. Now the sky may have been blue in the east, but here in the mid-west it was very, very grey and still is grey. Also from a spiritual perspective, we all come from different spiritual denominations and with different cultural backgrounds. Therefore we will differ, and some know only how to differ in a very exerted way that may seem cruel at times to us. We all want to be right. We all have the human mindset, I`m right and therefore everybody else must be wrong. I guess when we get to heaven and we`ll see the facts the way they are we`ll have to ask ourselves the embarressing question [sm=icon_smile_question.gif] Did I really believe that? Also remember, not all people who claim to be Christians and are posting on FaithWalk are really Christians or are walking with the Lord. [sm=car.gif] Therfore hold on to your hats for the rides going to get rough. The other alternative is, if the rides to rough, don`t get on.

SonInMe1 -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/21/2008 9:25:17 PM)
Nathan would not be a popular person on this board. It demonstrates why Davd had a heart for God. After telling the story of the "bad" man, David was insenced, " Who is this man?". Nathan said...it is you. You did this and that. David did not retaliate as he could have as king. He was remorseful. There is a definition of love there and a good example for us in forums. Matthew 18 as well...15-21 if I remember correctly. The expulsion of the immoral brother is another example.

Little_1 -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/22/2008 2:05:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SonInMe1 Nathan would not be a popular person on this board. It demonstrates why Davd had a heart for God. After telling the story of the "bad" man, David was insenced, " Who is this man?". Nathan said...it is you. You did this and that. David did not retaliate as he could have as king. He was remorseful. There is a definition of love there and a good example for us in forums. Matthew 18 as well...15-21 if I remember correctly. The expulsion of the immoral brother is another example. These are good points SonInMe1 - Nathan was a Godly example of how God would have us to point out sin in another to lead them to repentance, i.e. Nathan pointed out sin in David's life in the manner he should have (i.e. no insults - rather Nathan gave a metaphoric example which made David think about the sin being wrong, i.e. Nathan 'set the stage' to uncover David's sin and bring him face to face with how God felt about it). I believe David 'knew' he did wrong when he took another man's wife in the first place but he chose to smother his conscious; however, thankfully God loves us too much to let us cover our sins up. The other example you mention about is the immoral brother. I posted about this example in reply #17. Both are excellent examples to follow in pointing out error in a spirit of love with the emphasis on bringing the other person to repentance. Thankfully - the 'man after God's own heart' (i.e. David) was repentant and forgiven.

Liveloved -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/22/2008 9:40:04 AM)
quote: Why do Christians who don't agree with each other's posts become defensive and in some cases sarcastic? Defensiveness is all about me and that is the place we are all called to die to in order to follow Christ. It is a painful process and until we are willing to have our eyes opened to our self defending ways, we won't see them and give them up. Most responses are not to the OP and their question but a defensive response to another respondent. We think we have to justify, defend, and be 'right'. It is the way of the natural man. And, if we're 'really good at it', we'll defend ourselves with all kinds of scripture as well. Jesus walked a very different path. He laid it all down. He didn't seek after His interests but those of others. So we should ask, "Am I trying to answer the OP and help him on his walk with Jesus OR am I just defending what 'I' think is right, what 'I' do, etc?" We are told to "do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others." And then the passage goes on to tell us how Jesus humbled Himself to the point of death on the cross. No, we don't do this very well. Pride looms large and until we are ready and willing to have the crucifying work done within, it continues to wreak havoc in the body of Christ just as it does in the world. So we see pride doing its ugly work here as well. James asks "what is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you? Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members? You lust and do not have; so you commit murder. And you are envious and cannot obtain; so you fight and quarrel." But the good news is that as we draw closer and closer to Jesus, communing with Him, we are shown our sinful, ways of self and can give them up. Turning away from self and toward Jesus is the path of life. And this path leads to fullness of joy.[:)]

URForgiven -> RE: Why are some of God's children sometimes rude to others? (4/22/2008 2:15:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Liveloved quote: Why do Christians who don't agree with each other's posts become defensive and in some cases sarcastic? Defensiveness is all about me and that is the place we are all called to die to in order to follow Christ. It is a painful process and until we are willing to have our eyes opened to our self defending ways, we won't see them and give them up. Most responses are not to the OP and their question but a defensive response to another respondent. We think we have to justify, defend, and be 'right'. It is the way of the natural man. And, if we're 'really good at it', we'll defend ourselves with all kinds of scripture as well. Jesus walked a very different path. He laid it all down. He didn't seek after His interests but those of others. So we should ask, "Am I trying to answer the OP and help him on his walk with Jesus OR am I just defending what 'I' think is right, what 'I' do, etc?" We are told to "do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others." And then the passage goes on to tell us how Jesus humbled Himself to the point of death on the cross. No, we don't do this very well. Pride looms large and until we are ready and willing to have the crucifying work done within, it continues to wreak havoc in the body of Christ just as it does in the world. So we see pride doing its ugly work here as well. James asks "what is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you? Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members? You lust and do not have; so you commit murder. And you are envious and cannot obtain; so you fight and quarrel." But the good news is that as we draw closer and closer to Jesus, communing with Him, we are shown our sinful, ways of self and can give them up. Turning away from self and toward Jesus is the path of life. And this path leads to fullness of joy.[:)] Nicely said LiveLoved. An important remainder for us all.

figmentPez -> RE: Why are some of God's sometimes rude to others? (4/23/2008 12:26:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: colliefan In terms of doctrine, there are major and minor points of doctrine and when someone feels what is a major point of doctrine and it is called a minor point, feelings again get hurt. quote: ORIGINAL: URForgiven The anonymity of these forums is part of it. People feel free to treat others in a way they never would in the "real" world, simply because they are cloaked, hovering over their computer screens. Again, one would hope that it would be different for Christians. quote: ORIGINAL: drcain Simple answer? Pride. The oldest sin recorded is pride. "I see it my way and if you don't, you are an idiot." Sound familiar? That is pride. The idea that "my way" is better than "your way" in the context of the OP is a stumbling block that I myself has had to overcome (and still do). Galatians 3:1 You foolish Galatians, who has bewitched you, before whose eyes Jesus Christ was publicly portrayed as crucified? Matthew 23:33 "You serpents, you brood of vipers, how will you escape the sentence of hell? 1 Corinthians 5:2 You have become arrogant and have not mourned instead, so that the one who had done this deed would be removed from your midst. Is there no doctrine worth strong words? Is there nothing that would cause to you wonder if a professing "christian" has been bewitched by some deception? Is there no theological stance that you would consider calling it's adherents a "brood of vipers"? Is there no sin that is being embraced that would make you say that someone has become arrogant when they should have mourned? I'll tell you the truth. If someone denies that Jesus Christ is God incarnate, the eternally begotten Son of God made flesh, I will call them a heretic in public, to their face, just as surely as I will tell them that on these forums. If someone denies this basic and essential truth of Christianity, they are not a Christian, and they need to be told that. There are doctrines that are worth defending, with strong words. There are teachings of God that are absolutely, unquestionably, major doctrine that must be accepted for someone to follow Jesus Christ. It is not pride that says that Jesus Christ is God. It is not the anonymity of the forums that gave the disciples to proclaim that Jesus Christ is LORD, even to their deaths.

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