RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here!
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 8:42:22 AM
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John_O
Posts: 6882
Joined: 9/5/2006
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The snarkiness thread? Where's it at?
Actually I'm pretty happy. It's John that was sad. (Isn't that right John? Oh come on. Blow your nose and come talk!!) John can be awfully moody sometimes. Glad I'm not him.
(wait a minute! am I him? I've lost track... OOHHHHHHH NNNOOOOOOOO!!)
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Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 8:42:45 AM
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mutinywxgirl
Posts: 12768
Joined: 4/29/2005
From: west coast of FL
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It's in Theo House
here
< Message edited by mutinywxgirl -- 5/15/2008 8:48:45 AM >
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When blood and water hit the ground.
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down.
We were free and made alive.
The day true love died. The day true love died.
THE ROWDIES ARE BACK!!!!!!!
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 11:54:38 AM
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FunBetty
Posts: 4186
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Dr Pepper Country
Status: offline
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Good morning, Johnno.
Johnno, I've been recently lacking in bad jokes. Can you tell us a joke please????
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 12:56:46 PM
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Focusing
Posts: 5221
Joined: 5/19/2007
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Perhaps he can come here and share some punny stories!!
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Sam
"You're my nightcap"
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 1:36:33 PM
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besiderself
Posts: 1124
Joined: 11/8/2007
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Hi!
Uhmmm...is it really so unusual to find John talking to himself, even in a crowd of people?
Nah. Didn't think so.
At any rate: Hello John!
Here. Have a Jelly Bean.
besiderself
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Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability
Sam Keen
Besiderself's Batty Belfry
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 1:50:48 PM
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John_O
Posts: 6882
Joined: 9/5/2006
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exo 16-21
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Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 1:55:19 PM
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WaitingforBoaz
Posts: 3019
Joined: 2/11/2008
From: The Hundred Acre Wood
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quote:
ORIGINAL: John_O
exo 16-21
O Come on! You just come in and ignore all these fine folks. (stomps off)
I'm leaving!
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Nadine
The LORD repay your work, and a full reward be given you by the LORD God of Israel, under whose wings you have come for refuge.” Ruth 2:12
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 2:00:55 PM
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John_O
Posts: 6882
Joined: 9/5/2006
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Hello Everyone!! Thought I was being invaded there for a moment.
Someone asked for a joke?!
A rather inhibited engineer splurged on a luxury cruise to the Caribbean. And just as he was beginning to enjoy himself, a hurricane roared upon the huge ship, capsizing it like a child's toy. Somehow the engineer, desperately hanging on to a life preserver, managed to wash ashore on a secluded island.
Outside of beautiful scenery, a spring-fed pool, bananas and coconuts, there was little else. He lost all hope and for hours on end, sat under same palm tree. One day, after several months had passed, a gorgeous woman in a small rowboat appeared.
"I'm from the other side of the island," she said. "Were you on the cruise ship, too?"
"Yes, I was," he answered. "But where did you get that rowboat?" "Well, I whittled the oars from gum tree branches, wove the reinforced gunnel from palm branches and made the keel and stern from a Eucalyptus tree."
"But what on earth did you use for tools?" asked the man.
"There was a very unusual strata of alluvial rock exposed on the south side of the island. I discovered that if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into forgeable ductile iron. But tell me," she said. "Where have you been living all this time? I don't see any shelter."
"I've just been sleeping on the beach," he told her.
"Would you like to come to my place?" she asked. The engineer nodded dumbly.
She expertly rowed them around to her side of the island and tied up the boat with a handsome strand of hand-woven hemp topped with a neat back splice. They walked up a winding stone walk she had laid and around a Palm tree. There stood an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white.
"It's not much, but I call it home." Inside, she asked him to sit and offered him a drink.
"No, thanks," said the man. "One more coconut juice and I'll throw up!"
"It's not coconut juice," the woman replied. "I have a crude still out back, so we can have authentic Pina Coladas."
Trying to hide his amazement, the man accepted the drink and they sat down on her couch to talk. After they had exchanged stories, the woman said, "Tell me, have you always had a beard?"
"No," said the man, "I was clean shaven all of my life until I ended up on this island."
"Well if you'd like to shave, there's a razor upstairs in the bathroom cabinet."
The man, no longer questioning anything, went upstairs to the bathroom and shaved with an intricate bone-and-shell device honed razor sharp. Next he showered - not even attempting to fathom a guess as to how she managed to get warm water into the bathroom - and went back downstairs. He couldn't help but admire the masterfully carved banister as he walked.
"You look great," said the woman. "I think I'll go up and slip into something more comfortable."
As she did, the man continued to sip his Pina Colada. After a short time, the woman, smelling faintly of gardenias, returned wearing a revealing gown fashioned out of pounded palm fronds.
"Tell me," she asked, "we've both been out here for a very long time with no companionship. You know what I mean. Have you been lonely...is there anything that you really, really miss? Something that all men and woman need? Something that would be really nice to have right now!"
"Yes there is!" the man replied, shucking off his shyness. "There is something I've wanted to do for so long. But on this island all alone, it was just...well, it was impossible..."
"Well, it's not impossible, any more," the woman said seductively.
The man, practically panting in excitement, said breathlessly: "You mean you actually figured out some way we can check our e-mail here?"
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Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 2:02:35 PM
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John_O
Posts: 6882
Joined: 9/5/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: followtheLeader
quote:
ORIGINAL: John_O
exo 16-21
O Come on! You just come in and ignore all these fine folks. (stomps off)
I'm leaving!
You are far too hasty. I only came in to post my reading and then I find all sorts of wonderful people had left me wonderful greetings. It takes time to post a reply. Especially when people ask for jokes.
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Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 3:06:48 PM
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John_O
Posts: 6882
Joined: 9/5/2006
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quote:
ORIGINAL: besiderself
Oh! 
Does that mean you are "reading" by listening on your way to work?
I have bible mp3s that I listen to. It's not as good as reading, but quite often it's all I get.
Nope. I just read from several different bibles and this way I can keep all my bookmarks in one place.
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Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 3:16:05 PM
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FunBetty
Posts: 4186
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Dr Pepper Country
Status: offline
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I came in here because I was having John jokes withdrawals.
And now, one for you...
A Baptist preacher and his wife decided to get a new dog. Ever mindful of the congregation, they knew the dog must also be a Baptist. They visited kennel after kennel and explained their needs. Finally, they found a kennel whose owner assured them he had just the dog they wanted.
The owner brought the dog to meet the pastor and his wife. "Fetch the Bible," he commanded. The dog bounded to the bookshelf, scrutinized the books, located the Bible, and brought it to the owner. "Now find Psalm 23" he commanded. The dog dropped the Bible to the floor and showing the marvelous dexterity with his paws, leafed through and found the correct passage, then pointed to it with his paw. The pastor and his wife were very impressed and purchased the dog. That evening, a group of church members came to visit.
The pastor and his wife began to show off the dog, having him locate several Bible verses. The visitors were very impressed. Finally, one man asked, "Can he do regular dog tricks, too?" "I haven't tried yet," the pastor replied. He pointed his finger at the dog. "HEEL!" the pastor commanded. The dog immediately jumped on a chair, placed one paw on the pastor's forehead and began to howl. The pastor looked at his wife in shock and said, "Good Lord! He's Pentecostal."
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RE: Members of the John_O Fan club society. Get in here! - 5/15/2008 3:20:15 PM
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John_O
Posts: 6882
Joined: 9/5/2006
Status: offline
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Great joke Betty!! Thanks
_____________________________
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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Hey, did you read the snarkiness thread? That'll cheer you up. 
Hi John! 
Uniquely Super UF 
