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bride48 -> RE: Here Comes The Bride (7/8/2006 5:03:15 PM)
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The following is from my MSN Space blog:
When I was little, my physical therapist monitored my progress each year by taking black and white home movies of me. It always rather shocked me to see that gangly, jerky creature on the screen (a body distorted with Cerebral Palsy) and hear the therapist coo, "There's Debbie!" I saw myself as a princess, not as a female Quasimodo.
Growing up, I wanted to be called "Deborah" or "Deb." When I wrote short stories outside of school, I'd sport the by-line, "D. Lynn Simmons." My middle name seemed so much prettier to me than my first name. As I approached high school, I didn't make a big fuss when people called me "Debbie," but I'd try to steer them towards calling me "Deb."
During my senior year of college, I hit on the idea of being called "DebbieLynne." It seemed to come out of the ante-bellum South, carrying images of pastel hoop-skirt dressess, lacy parisols, soft Georgia accents and the heavy perfume of Magnolia trees on a summer evening. In other words, I felt pretty when I thought of myself as "DebbieLynne." And ugly when I thought of myself as "Debbie."
Just a few years ago, I realized that, deep down, I connected the name "Debbie" with the home movies that my therapist shot. And while I can't deny that Cerebral Palsy does make my body difficult to look at (although my husband thinks otherwise), I know that Jesus has made me one of His princesses. In Him, I am lovely, and using "DebbieLynne" reminds me of my loveliness. My new last name, which my husband gave me on our wedding day, deepens my feelings of bing beautiful and cherished.
My name is DebbieLynne.
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