Kelly Balarie

Responding like Jesus When People Judge You

#faith #hope #love #criticism

For the longest time, judgments have thrown me off.

If I saw you looking at me weird, I was convinced you hated me.
If you had a comment that I wasn’t doing things right, I’d be devastated.
If you raised an eyebrow at my parenting style, I’d want to go climb into a hole and stay there until you are long gone.

It’s been hard for me to contend with people who condemn.

With certain people, I expect them to act a certain way. I can almost hear the words they’re going to say before they say them. I can almost see the pain strike my heart before the words are even formed in their mouth. With this, I internally fear and steer clear of them. I put up layers so they don’t prick me. I hide to protect my own hide.

I think, today, though, I am ready to admit, I am pretty much tired of this approach. I no longer want to relegate myself to a hole like a tiny mouse unworthy and unable to be myself. I want to step out – into the light – and do my thing, gnaw on cheese, squeak with joy or pounce around without caring what you, or anyone else, for that matter, thinks.

Jesus didn’t tell us to hide our light. He told us to shine it.

Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead, they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. Mt. 5:15-16

Recently, I met with a friend. She’s spent every day of her life being who a family member wanted her to be. I could see how it had taken a toll on her. I could see she was ready to, like a butterfly, break out of her cocoon and fly-free. I wanted to see her colors. I knew God had something great for her – when she’d start being – who he made her to be.

God is helping me to see things. If we let external criticisms dwell as internal truths, we’ll live imprisoned. You see, the peanut gallery will always have comments as to who we should be. Yet, we don’t have to be who they say we should be. Who we should be is - who God created us to be.

What if Jesus changed who God created him to be in order to accommodate man’s standards? In order to please Pharisees or religious elite?

Jesus didn't let criticism and condemnation define him. With this, God gives man's condemnation no room to define us either. There is simply no one who has the power to destroy us. Because Jesus believed in who Father made him to be, and walked accordingly, he duct-taped the world’s mouth shut. No one could waver the mission of Jesus, because Jesus never gave them the chance to.
I want to be like that. Do you

Like Jesus, if we just hear the Word of God and walk accordingly, it doesn’t matter what man says. He can’t change our destiny. He can’t wreck our future. He may try to tell us we are ugly, we will never succeed or we are always falling short. But…blah, blah, blah he goes.
Jesus is in me.
The Spirit is alive.

The fruits of the Spirit are growing.

With this power working from me, I can turn right back around and say to him words of: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness and self-control.

Why? Not because I am good, but because Jesus’ good love holds me tight and says, I am untouchable. I am unremovable from his care. I am undeniably chosen and wanted. For Jesus is attached in me, not the words of someone trying to take me down.

Buy my book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears!

Take part in the 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

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Why You Keep Sinning

#hope #grace #love #life


In order to put on my ski clothes, I had to tug on long johns. Then, I'd layer super-tight, hard-to-get-on socks. One after another, I'd put everything on until my legs felt like they were the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. Only then, would I pull on my snow pants, the final covering that prevented all cold water from entering the warmth that was under the coverings.

There was a process to the putting-on. I couldn't just start and end with the outer shell of snow pants. If I did, I'd go through the night freezing.

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.  Col. 3:12

Compassion. Kindness. Humility. Gentleness. Patience.
These are great things. We run after them. Daily we attempt to put them on, don't we?

I know I do...

I wake in the morning and tell myself, today, I am going to be compassionate and kind. I am going to speak gently and tenderly to my children. Two minutes later, I blast them. Their faces look plastered with shock at my poorly chosen words. Sorry?

I also whisper to the Lord, "I am humble. I want to walk in low places with you." Ten minutes later, I think, "I could have done that ten times better." Whoops! 

I try to move towards gentleness and patience, saying, "Watch out world!" Halfway through the day, I am tapping my toe and giving the evil eye to the car that's moving at a snails pace." Go figure.

What God calls me to put on - falls off halfway through the day.

Ever noticed this happens to you? Every wondered why?

I've noticed, I put on the shell of good acts, but what lays under is empty. Underneath, I have not layered myself up, with God, so I can endure the cold times of my day. This discourages us. It causes me to think, "I can never do this Christian faith thing," "I will always fail" or "There's no use for me."

Do you feel like there is now hope for you too?

Like try you may, but you will always fail?

What if we have it all wrong? I can't help but think, God didn't just tell us to "do", there is a whole other component - a component I often forget about. Take a second look at the first part of that verse above: "Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved..." (Col. 3:12)

First things first, friends.

Embracing the goodness of God, lets you live the goodness of God.

To feel embraced, you must layer up:

Layer 1: You are chosen. God picked you. He wanted you. He will use you. He has plans for you.

Layer 2: You are holy. His hanging on the cross, earned your holy status. Nothing can remove that from you.

Layer 3: You are dearly loved. You are loved from above and even when you act dumb, still, you are loved.

As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance... (1 Pet. 1:14)

As ones internally covered with God's garment of grace, mercy and love, like children who need what God has, let us draw near to God's warmth, so we may go to the cold places of the world.

Order Kelly’s powerful book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears, today!

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all the Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

 


When You're the Only One Not Gifted

#faith #fear #doubt #gifts



Baseball. It taught me who I am and what to never, ever, do.

It all started on the bus ride to a game...

"Hey....Kelly," the men's Italian voices echoed in unison as I walked down the center aisle, clothed brightly in both team colors and Disney World-like smile. Breathing it all in, I could fully sense the air of excitement: it smelled like Syran-wrapped ham sandwiches with American cheese, it sounded like a portable pre-game radio talk and it felt like the freedom of crunched peanut shells underfoot.

Crackerjack box in hand, I left that bus and walked the stands like I owned the place. This day, I'd be - encourager. The fans would hear my chants, they'd see my team colors and, like last year, I'd start the wave. No doubt, where two or more are gathered, my sister and me? We'd move mountains - or the masses in this case.

We did. We cheered and the wave moved the stadium. The game was groundbreaking. I didn't watch a lick of it. Still, I learned: she who thinks she is small is big when she let's loose God's gifts within her.

I liked that idea, very much. What I didn't like was all this talk about the pitcher's slump. Apparently, he lost his luck, which was ironic since he did a little song and dance before every pitch. Plus, I couldn't figure out how he could possibly be in a "slump." He was still the same man as yesterday. He wasn't hurt or crippled. He could still throw 102 miles an hour. He still was strong and powerful. Yet, somewhere along the line, his mind failed him. I guess he figured, "I've lost my effectiveness," or "I'm a fraud." Maybe he thought, "They'll all laugh at me if I do bad" or "I really never was as good as I thought."

That pitcher? The fear that stole his could, was the mindset of - I can't.

I've had his mind of anxiety lately - one of I can't. I can't act godly enough. I can't love my kids well enough. I can't do what God is calling me to. I can't find my way. I can't get out of the hole of discouragement. God can't really love me, can he?

Fear has sent me to left-field looking for daisies.

And that gift of encouragement? The one that rises people out of their seats, the one that can move masses, the one that sings Jesus' name? It's a crumb in the bleachers.

What gift of God feels lost? Frightened away by fears?

What spiritual base of - I can - through Christ - has been stolen by the mindset of - I can't?

Perhaps, like the pitcher, we recognize, our mind may say we can't, but the grace of Jesus says, "We can."

Grace says we are:

Loved beyond the very definition of the word.
Cared for infinitely and intimately.
As much saved today as yesterday.
As free as the grave is empty.
As victorious as Jesus is lion.
As gifted as always.
Irrevocably called.

Our mindset doesn't define us, a mind set on Christ does.

Choose to win.

Baseball is a fight to win. So is the Christian walk. You can't walk out on the field of dreams without the armor of grace, truth and love. That's a fight in futility friends. I've played like that - in defeat - for 36/38ths of my Christian life. I remained - slumped.

Sure, I knew Scripture.
Sure, I knew about God.
Sure, I knew the right thing to do.
But, surely it was in my head, not my heart.

A switch must occur. Have you heard of a switch-hitter? It is a player who can hit from either side of the plate. God is calling us to switch to a new mindset that can attack any fear, fret or fury from any side. With a mind set on Christ, led by the power of the Holy Spirit, nothing can stop us.

Today, let's be switch-hitters - ones with eyes set on Christ, ones ready to fight -and win.

Order Kelly’s powerful book, Fear Fighting: Awakening Courage to Overcome Your Fears, today!

Discover how to flee from fear and fly in faith through 4 Days to Fearless Challenge.

Get all the Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.