Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minded women?
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Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minded wo... - 4/29/2008 10:58:27 PM
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aldrmctchr
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I know this is a loaded question, but I am trying to understand more and learn from my previous experiences.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 4/30/2008 12:21:41 AM
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alaskadrifter
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I would think it depends on how you present yourself/interact with others. For me, I think I could get along fine with most people, as long as they are not proud or arrogant.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 4/30/2008 1:12:00 AM
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ChoirDJ
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Yes...your question is about as loaded as a double barrel shotgun (lol). I agree with the previous poster.
I don't think most spiritual men are intimidated by intelligent and strong women but insecure and unsipiritual men are. What is a turn off is when a woman who uses that intelligence to try to wear the pants in the relationship and that was a huge part of what eventually led to the breakdown in my marriage. In the interest of being humble, respectful and considerate of her views, I would go to my ex for her thoughts on how to deal with a situation and she couldn't give the advice without criticizing, belittling or wanting to take over. Not that I didn't feel confident in making many decisions but I was really trying to do things as a team rather than dictate how things were going to be. There was no acceptable way for me to tell her that I just needed her help and not for her to take over. If she couldn't take over she would usually end up getting angry and shutting down. I rarely felt the sense of us approaching problems as a team because I always felt she was too busy trying to one up me when there was no need to do that.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 4/30/2008 9:03:07 AM
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TomTurn
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quote:
I would think it depends on how you present yourself/interact with others. For me, I think I could get along fine with most people, as long as they are not proud or arrogant.
Ditto, if presented in a "male trait" way, as a single guy I am just not interested in dating/marrying another guy. If presented in a feminine way, I like it and am not "threatend".
A "man" wants to be with a "woman", go figure.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 4/30/2008 1:18:08 PM
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APZR
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Strong minded... closed minded... or strong willed?
I enjoy a good intellectual conversation, not arguing, but have a low tolerance for those who flat out refuse to listen to opposing views and ideas.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 4/30/2008 4:42:14 PM
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StephenJ
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Not really, insecure guys maybe.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 4/30/2008 6:08:34 PM
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PreserveWildlife
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quote:
Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minded women? I am not.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 4/30/2008 9:55:43 PM
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tbrobinson
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Nope. Married on 28 years ago. She challenges me and keeps me on the straight and narrow. Her walk has forced me at times to examine mine.
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Psalm 118.5/6 In my anguish I cried out to the Lord and he answered me by setting me free. The Lord is with me, I will not be afraid.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/1/2008 1:05:17 PM
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SavedByGraceMD
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Not me, I find a strong smart woman very attractive. Unless you mean a feminist, then I would say that I would be put off.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/2/2008 10:05:15 AM
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aldrmctchr
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I am definitely not closed minded. Strong willed....maybe. As I have grown older and somewhat wiser I have learned to back off a little and not be quite so blunt. I am not a feminist either. I just have opinions and want to be able to discuss matters with a gentleman who can hold a "real" conversation.
Beyond SHADOW OF A doubt my ex was insecure, very. He always said he was dumb and that I didn't deserve such a mean person and all of his ****, and he always said that he wondered if I would be better off without him...I guess I will find out, although not my choice...I believe whole heartedly in working on a marriage, but you can't do that if the other party just can't or won't communicate.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/2/2008 11:16:43 AM
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Child4Jesus
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I will put my piece in.
I agree with the posters here. I am not threatened by an intelligent and strong minded woman. If however my strong minded: closed minded... or strong willed then I wouldn't be threatened but turned off. If she is a feminist then forget about it. Being proud or arrogant would be a huge turnoff as well.
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Richad
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/2/2008 1:25:32 PM
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trainfan
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quote:
Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minded women?
I am not, so long as it is not held over my head all the time. Then it would just be a turnoff.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/2/2008 1:38:51 PM
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ladyamythist
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Having grown up in the 60's, when there was so much stuff written on women and feminism, NOT to be strong-minded was truly looked down on. Join the military, go to college and get a career, you can't depend on a man, toot your own horn. How disastrous this stuff is to relationships.
Then, you had what your church said, stay married, have babies, support hubby. But, no one really told us "how", since we were seeing great marriages to copy. How do we find someone who will go the distance? Hum....take would take two mature individuals with a lot of knowledge.
I like what I have been reading here. One thing I know. The world doesn't know what to do to make a marriage last. So, when you look to the Word, you read that God highly honors a woman with a quiet spirit. Don't we all like people with quiet spirits? Don't we prefer to be around them? Brash, rude, in your face type of women are a turn off to me as girlfriends; they most certainly seem to be that way to men. And, those men who do have relationship with women practicing that condition of spirit, aren't ones that I am attracted to. It seems that their relationship actually mirrors those poor qualities.
No, there is nothing wrong with having qualities that are masculine, and we as women can have them. We just don't have to be a man to exhibit them. We can handle them in a feminine way. And men, when they show the qualities we consider feminine, and they do so in a strong, manly way, don't we love them for their way of showing that they are men, and not women? I don't want to fall in love with a women, but a MAN! I appreciate the understanding that this forum has given me. I think it's due to the insight of the MEN who are posting here. Thank you Brothers!!!
Annette
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/2/2008 5:17:06 PM
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ChoirDJ
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Good points ladyamythist...Men tend to be logical and concrete one the one hand were women tend to be more in tune with the emotional and abstract side of life. The key to a successful relationship is not beating the other side over the head until he/she sees things your way but for both sides to meet somewhere in the middle. You're sort of expressing that same idea but in a different way. Men need to be more in tune emotionally and women need to balance the emotions out with logic.
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Live each day as thought it were your last for one day you will be right.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/4/2008 11:10:14 AM
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aldrmctchr
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I wished mine would have even met me a third of the way!
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/5/2008 12:34:31 PM
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ChoirDJ
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LOL  .
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/7/2008 10:22:08 AM
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APZR
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quote:
ORIGINAL: aldrmctchr
I am definitely not closed minded. Strong willed....maybe. As I have grown older and somewhat wiser I have learned to back off a little and not be quite so blunt. I am not a feminist either. I just have opinions and want to be able to discuss matters with a gentleman who can hold a "real" conversation.
Beyond SHADOW OF A doubt my ex was insecure, very. He always said he was dumb and that I didn't deserve such a mean person and all of his ****, and he always said that he wondered if I would be better off without him...I guess I will find out, although not my choice...I believe whole heartedly in working on a marriage, but you can't do that if the other party just can't or won't communicate.
Sounds reasonable to me. To have a strong marriage you've got to have similar interest, including intellectual stimulation. I've seen couples where one is smart and could be the leader of a nation, but the other could be the poster child for a impulsive, mud bogging, parting, "hold my beer and watch this" kind of redneck. Those relationships never last, completely different desires in life style. So to answer your question knowing more about your situation... no, a smart and wise woman would not scare me away. You will just need to become active in social activities that you enjoy and stimulate your mind, and date like minded gentlemen. If you go to a greasy spoon, pool hall bar to look for dates... you know what to expect.
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Ya can't keep trouble from visitin, but you don't have to offer it a chair.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/8/2008 11:27:41 PM
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doer
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quote:
ORIGINAL: aldrmctchr
I know this is a loaded question, but I am trying to understand more and learn from my previous experiences.
I am a single guy looking for an intelligent, strong minded woman.
_____________________________
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/9/2008 12:32:02 PM
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TomTurn
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Is this a strong minded woman?
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/9/2008 1:06:27 PM
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DaveW
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Only the dumb and/or weak minded ones.
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/9/2008 3:44:56 PM
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aldrmctchr
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No, definitely not that bad! She may have had some valid points, but that is not the way to go about it. That is what I hate. I hate yelling and screaming and cursing, especially when it is directed at me! 
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RE: Are guys threatened by intelligent and strong minde... - 5/9/2008 3:46:46 PM
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aldrmctchr
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DOER - Your name reminds of the insurance commercial where the artist has his studio saved by his insurance agent and he asks who is Steve the Doer?
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